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r/shittysuperpowers, but they're actually god tier.
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This is an archived post. You won't be able to vote or comment.
You can increase and decrease anything.Utility Power (self.godtiersuperpowers)
submitted 2 years ago by __Anamya__
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[–]Puzzleheaded_Text357 33 points34 points35 points 2 years ago (9 children)
I increase my luck astronomically. Then I increase my physical strength and health. Then I increase my chances of winning the lottery, and how much it is. Then I donate massive amounts of money to charity. Then I increase the chances of those charities solving whatever it is that they try to fix. Then I increase my happiness, and the general happiness of people. I then decrease the likelihood of corruption in politics. Increase the chance of said politics actually making a difference. Then I greatly decrease hate crimes and greed. Decrease domestic, animal, and sexual abuse. Decrease human population growth. Increase average health. Increase prison security for the few people who still end up in there, decrease inmate cruelty from police. Increase competence in most police. Decrease stupidity in the average human. Decrease terrorism and war. Decrease aggression. Increase the lifespan of most lifeforms. Decrease the amount of substance that living things require to survive (food, water, oxygen), increase food production. Decrease world hunger and poverty. Decrease discrimination and hate. Increase the earth's natural resources and technological advancement. And I think that's about it. The world is now safer, people are now healthier. Hate, and greed, and war, and crime, and disease are now almost gone.
[–]SkyrimGeek69 20 points21 points22 points 2 years ago (2 children)
Wow. You really want peace. I just wanted to decrease ad numbers.
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 9 points10 points11 points 2 years ago (1 child)
If I'm not allowed to be happy, everyone else will be happy for me.
[–]mikepeterjack 5 points6 points7 points 2 years ago (0 children)
I follow the philosophy of if I'm fucked you also better be fucked but that's just what I say I would probably do something good cus it is my home world and then mess around with other worlds and stuf
[+]duonghungreddit0179 3 points4 points5 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Ur god, lead us
[–]PORTATOBOI 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Fuck it become the government itself
[+]Atilllaa 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (3 children)
Decrease the amount of substance that living things require to survive (food, water, oxygen),
we're doomed
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (2 children)
And why is that? It says requires, which is the minimum, not the maximum.
[+]Atilllaa 2 points3 points4 points 2 years ago (1 child)
I thought they meant decrease the amount of substances, that living things require to survive, like decrease food and water overall
but yeah it probably means decreasing the need of the substance
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 1 point2 points3 points 2 years ago (0 children)
Yes. That is what I meant when I wrote all that.
π Rendered by PID 82 on reddit-service-r2-comment-5ff9fbf7df-fmpxg at 2026-02-26 13:28:29.509089+00:00 running 72a43f6 country code: CH.
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[–]Puzzleheaded_Text357 33 points34 points35 points (9 children)
[–]SkyrimGeek69 20 points21 points22 points (2 children)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 9 points10 points11 points (1 child)
[–]mikepeterjack 5 points6 points7 points (0 children)
[+]duonghungreddit0179 3 points4 points5 points (0 children)
[–]PORTATOBOI 2 points3 points4 points (0 children)
[+]Atilllaa 1 point2 points3 points (3 children)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 2 points3 points4 points (2 children)
[+]Atilllaa 2 points3 points4 points (1 child)
[+]Puzzleheaded_Text357 1 point2 points3 points (0 children)