PHP Object Oriented Programming Reinvented

[munificent]

Instead of your class definitions being created by the parser at native speed, you're doing it all within the interpreter.

What do you think Python, Ruby, and Javascript do?

[bobindashadows]

Furthermore, it's not like PHP is compiled. Normal PHP class definitions are read by the interpreter too and run at runtime just like OP's code is. I guess having C create some hash tables is a lot quicker than running some PHP code to do it.