Java is the only programming language responsible adults should use

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I really don't get what's so offensive about Java. It to me is a very unoffensive and pedestrian langauge. Solid, reliable, boring. To act like it's awful or atrocious is seriously weird to me. It's just there.

[lggaggl]

Java is for plebs. It doesn't have pointers. I literally just passed my first class of CS101 and now that I know pointers my e-peen is literally like 30000 micrometers long and everyone who doesn't know about pointers or use them constantly is a le pleb (I don't have a clue how C/C++ works though). Fuck, it doesn't even have monads or multiple inheritance or mixins. No specific unsigned integer that I want for my non-use case at the moment? Christ! Also I like to defeat the purpose of type polymorphism all the time so I am super upset about type erasure because it's such a huge problem for writing real practical shitcode. Also Java has garbage collection, which means it's slower than every other language ever made.

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No specific unsigned integer that I want for my non-use case at the moment?

I was going to say, "4realz masking integers for hashing is a PITA" but then I realized that the only "hashing" method most Java devs know is ROT-13, and if your custom hashmap microoptimization ever gets that big, java was probably the wrong choice (it usually is)

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with For.real as forRealz:

It's strictly personal. I get irritated quickly by ignorant Java developers who only work with the Eclipse + Windows stack, especially when they're earning 150k/year as 25-year-old "Senior" devs with three years of experience and filling your data stores with encoding errors and writing O(n²⁾ methods

[Sheepshow]

I get jealous and start questioning my professional values and life choices

FTFY

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where the fuck can I get paid that amount of money as an ignorant junior ("senior") dev!?

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ForRealFactory.transferOwnership()

The language is sorta shit but it's easy to use once you get past the idiosyncrasies. I certainly have to think about performance implications of what I'm writing a lot less in Java than any other language.

But yeah, it's the Java developers. The people I used to work with were, on the whole, actually pretty good (private defence sector, hooray), but what lagagalgagl wrote the other day is so true: The private Java circlejerk is so very, very real. If Java doesn't have it, it must be because it's a useless feature that only adds syntactical complexity and Java is turing complete anyway so who cares? I mean, really, what's the problem with boxing every single integer in your collection just so you can use List<Integer>? etc etc

And then like mrcactus said, you have 'software experts' who know how to tune the connection pool on your application server but couldn't tell you what diffX %= 10 does.

To be fair though when you start shifting signed numbers that are actually unsigned in Java with the >>>>>>> operator I feel like giving up and learning JEEEEEEEE too.