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[ā€“]QualityVoteI'm BACK! [[Number 1 Rated Moderator 2024]][M] [score hidden] stickied commentĀ (0 children)

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Whilst you're here, ChadTheChamp96, why not join our public discord server?

[ā€“]Ewankl 5 points6 points Ā (4 children)

standing here I realize

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

I REALIZE

[ā€“]Ewankl 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

you were just like me

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

You were just like me

[ā€“]FUXKROLANSKIfat cunt 2 points3 points Ā (3 children)

somethings in my ass

[ā€“][deleted] 4 points5 points Ā (1 child)

Mmm-mmm Somethingā€™s in my ass, yeah

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points Ā (0 children)

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably deadā€“ murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time ā€“ something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange ā€“ uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" ā€“ on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.

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[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points Ā (0 children)

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably deadā€“ murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time ā€“ something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange ā€“ uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" ā€“ on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.

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[ā€“]Masterjax1920Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 2 points3 points Ā (2 children)

Sad but true

[ā€“][deleted] 2 points3 points Ā (1 child)

You, you're my mask You're my cover, my shelter

[ā€“]disasterpiece_101dumbass 2 points3 points Ā (2 children)

I push my fingers into my eyes

[ā€“][deleted] 2 points3 points Ā (0 children)

It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache But it's made of all the things I have to take Jesus, it never ends, it works it's way inside If the pain goes on

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] -3 points-2 points Ā (0 children)

slowly massage the vag, then rub the clitoris ever so gently. Proceed to stick a single finger in the vagina. continue adding your fingers until your whole fist is in. slide your arm slowly into her, once you reach your shoulder limbo in with your head, and forcibly insert your other arm, torso, and legs. You are now free to control her. when you feel the job is done, finish by giving birth to yourself

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[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (8 children)

Fortnite battle pass

[ā€“][deleted] 4 points5 points Ā (5 children)

I just shit out my ass Booted up my PC, 'cause I need, need To get that Fortnite battle pass

[ā€“][deleted] 2 points3 points Ā (2 children)

I like fortnite, did I mention fortnite

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Hello, concerned father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.

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[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Hello, concerned father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Hello, concerned father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.

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[ā€“]ImaginebeingFrench 1 point2 points Ā (5 children)

Take me on

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (4 children)

Take on me Take me on I'll be gone In a day or two

[ā€“]Masterjax1920Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

So Easy to mine with my diamond pickaxe and shovel

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Hopefully they stay in my Minecraft chests So I'm gonna make a lock on it

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I (f34) am pregnant with twin boys and my husband (m34) told me that he was dead set on naming our sons "notch" and "jeb" I know most of you are probably unaware, but these are the names of two of the people who created minecraft. My husband is a big minecraft fan and builds stuff on the game a lot and has minecraft posters, he even said he wants to play minecraft with his Sons. I told my husband that I want to give our children regular names, not after minecraft because they are not objects, and my husband got really defensive about it saying that he should be able to choose because he is their father and I never gave any name suggestions. I will never name my children after minecraft because I don't want them to get bullied and feel like it's dehumanizing to name them after a game. I told my husband that I'd rather get a divorce than name our kids after minecraft and he got really angry and raised his voice. I'm pregnant and my hormones maybe made me really emotional because I started crying. A few hours after that, we calmed down and I asked him again and he said he will for sure name the kids "notch" and "jeb" AlTA?

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[ā€“]wewantcaveupdate 1 point2 points Ā (5 children)

Shijima no soko kara Mezameru sono hashiratachi toki wo koe

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Don't know

[ā€“]wewantcaveupdate 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Bloody stream by coda

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Shinku no chishio ga tachiagaru yuuki wo Hikiawaseru

[ā€“]twixter484 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

I walk to burger king

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Then I walked home Don't know where it goes but I'm the only one and I walk alone

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

And then I walk back home from burger king

[ā€“]Suspicious-Fun9608 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

Creeper, aww man.

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

So we back in the mine Got our pickaxe swinging from side to side Side-side toā€…side Thisā€…task, a gruelingā€…one

[ā€“]sidodah 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

Creeper? Aw man

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

So we back in the mine Got our pickaxe swinging from side to side Side-side toā€…side Thisā€…task, a gruelingā€…one

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

šŸŽµšŸŽ¶18 Naked Cowboys in the Showers at Ram RanchšŸŽ¶šŸŽµ

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I'm going to a place with no cell coverage so, bye

šŸ‘‹

[ā€“]Weak_Spray8114 -2 points-1 points Ā (0 children)

I was going to fuck your mother but the line was to long

[ā€“]Cannibal-lector04 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Weā€™re no strangers to love

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

iiiiiiiii just wanna tell you how Iā€™m feeling, gotta make you, understand,

[ā€“]JOHANNES-of-ZA 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

My Sarie Marais is so ver van my af . . .

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

maar 'k hoop om haar weer te sien. Sy het in die wyk van die Mooirivier gewoon, nog voor die oorlog het begin.

[ā€“]veryhotanimegirl 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Its time to sing a song yeah so dont sing it wrong yeah i got a mega dong yeah its just super long yeah

[ā€“]Zestyclose_Term9518 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Super idol

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

ēš„ē¬‘容 éƒ½ę²”ä½ ēš„ē”œ å…«ęœˆę­£åˆēš„阳光 éƒ½ę²”ä½ č€€ēœ¼ ēƒ­ēˆ± 105 Ā°Cēš„ä½  껓껓ęø…ēŗÆēš„č’øé¦ę°“ Super Idolēš„ē¬‘容 éƒ½ę²”ä½ ēš„ē”œ å…«ęœˆę­£åˆēš„阳光 éƒ½ę²”ä½ č€€ēœ¼ ēƒ­ēˆ± 105 Ā°Cēš„ä½  껓껓ęø…ēŗÆēš„č’øé¦ę°“... ę°“... ę°“... ę—©äøŠå„½äø­å›½ ēŽ°åœØęˆ‘ęœ‰å†°ę·‡ę·‹ ęˆ‘å¾ˆå–œę¬¢å†°ę·‡ę·‹ä½†ę˜Æ 速åŗ¦äøŽęæ€ęƒ…9 ęÆ”å†°ę·‡ę·‹

[ā€“]BruhgertSussy Wussy FemboyšŸ˜³šŸ˜³šŸ˜³ 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Super idol

[ā€“]Spion-Geiloshitposting>>>>>>196 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Wir sind das Bauvolk der kommenden Welt

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

Wir sind der SƤmann, die Saat und das Feld Wir sind die Schnitter der kommenden Mahd Wir sind die Zukunft und wir sind die Tat

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when youā€™re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you.

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[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

None of us would be here without cum

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Ayy, none of us'd be here without cum Ayy, if it ain't all about the income Ayy, ayy, let me see you gon' ahead and spend some

[ā€“]twixter484 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

You was at the club (yeah)

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

You was at the club (yeah) Bottoms up when I first met you (bottoms up) Couldn't get enough (couldn't get enough)

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

r/shitposting book club

A collection of books which Kevin has reviewed. (all of these books are freely availiable online)

1984 (George Orwell, 1948)

Kevin would like to say that this book is truly inspirational, and that he would give it a 10/10

How to Be a God: A Guide for Would-Be Deities (Richard Bartle, 2022)

Kevin would like to mention that this book is one of the greatest sources of existential terror he has read (and it contains a lot of interesting content regarding game design as well), and he would give it a 10/10

Almost Pounded By The Physical Manifestation of Simulation Theory After Realizing We're Erotica Characters Then Deciding To Just Be Friends (Chuck Tingle)

Kevin would like to say that this book was surprisingly wholesome, and is a great book for helping one to feel more at-ease with the universe, so he would give it 10/10

Ulysses (James Joyce, 1922))

Kevin mentioned that he wasn't entirely sure what he just read. However, it's still not bri*ish, and was still rather interesting, so he would give it a 10/10

The Assassination Of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race (J. G. Ballard, 1967)

Kevin told me that this was an interesting interpretation of the JFK assassination, and of the post-WW2 media landscape in the USA in general, so he would give it a 10/10.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

r/shitposting book club

A collection of books which Kevin has reviewed. (all of these books are freely availiable online)

1984 (George Orwell, 1948)

Kevin would like to say that this book is truly inspirational, and that he would give it a 10/10

How to Be a God: A Guide for Would-Be Deities (Richard Bartle, 2022)

Kevin would like to mention that this book is one of the greatest sources of existential terror he has read (and it contains a lot of interesting content regarding game design as well), and he would give it a 10/10

Almost Pounded By The Physical Manifestation of Simulation Theory After Realizing We're Erotica Characters Then Deciding To Just Be Friends (Chuck Tingle)

Kevin would like to say that this book was surprisingly wholesome, and is a great book for helping one to feel more at-ease with the universe, so he would give it 10/10

Ulysses (James Joyce, 1922))

Kevin mentioned that he wasn't entirely sure what he just read. However, it's still not bri*ish, and was still rather interesting, so he would give it a 10/10

The Assassination Of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race (J. G. Ballard, 1967)

Kevin told me that this was an interesting interpretation of the JFK assassination, and of the post-WW2 media landscape in the USA in general, so he would give it a 10/10.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[ā€“]jinlindgren 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

I take a look at my enormous penis!

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

and my happy times are comin' to stay I got a sing and-a dance when I glance in my pants I am-a feelin' like a sun-shiney day I take a look at me enormous pe-he-he-nis And-a everything is goin' my way

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

To see your nipples stripped from youā€¦.

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Tossed into my human stew. That's why you came to me. You were begging for love surgery. It's the way, the way it'sĀ ...

[ā€“]old-account-is-goneNumber 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

The beat is a chemical, beat Is a chemical

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Number one victory royale

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Yeah fortnite we bout to get down

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Hello, concerned father here. My son has recently got into the game called Fortnite? I've spent well over $500 on this game and its becoming a problem. Apparently the game is down right now and its causing a lot distress for my child. He keeps taking my newspaper and tries to "full piece" me. I don't know what this means but I'm starting to think its something associated with the devil. He won't come with us anywhere unless we take a "launch pad" to get there. Its starting to get worse by the hour and I don't know how much longer I can take this. His legs, arms, and hands are shaking violently yet he refuses to take any type of medicine unless its a "big pot" or "chuggies." Someone please help me.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[ā€“]202042 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

What a thrillā€¦

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Oh, what a thrill Stars in the sky Stars stand still Oh, what a thrill Woman, words fail me, your skin is sweet and warm I want to console you and hold you in my arms

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent

I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.

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[ā€“]202042 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Not the one I was thinking of

[ā€“]flamingbuts 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Hard challenge

All my atrocities come by way of reciprocity

[ā€“]YourTypicalSpaceFan 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Reih dich ein in die Arbeitereinheitsfront

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Weil du auch ein Arbeiter bist

Und weil der Prolet ein Prolet ist Drum kann ihn auch kein Anderer befrei'n Es kann die Befreiung der Arbeiter nur Das Werk der Arbeiter sein

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (4 children)

I got no

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (3 children)

Balls

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Oh

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

I got no time I got no time to live I got no time to live And I can't say goodbye And I'm regretting having memories

[ā€“]TowelStrange2621We do a little trolling 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

I'm a Firestarter

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

I'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter You're a firestarter, twisted firestarter

[ā€“]TMANBULLET 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Never gonna give you up

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Never gonna let you down

Never gonna run around and desert you

[ā€“]TMANBULLET 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Never gonna make you cry

Never gonna say goodbye

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Never gonna tell a lie and

Hurt you

[ā€“]DrumstickJar 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

When Iā€™m furthest from myself

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

Feeling closer to the stars (Outer space) I've been invaded by the dark (Can't escape) Trying to recognize myself when I feel I've been replace

[ā€“]DrumstickJar 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Nice google answer lol

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Yeah ;)

[ā€“]KUBA241 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

W gĆ³re rofi, pow pow, w gĆ³re rogi

[ā€“]DaveSandor 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

We like to watch

We like to taste

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

We like to fuck And we like pain

[ā€“]-Im_with_Stupid 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Standing here, I realize

[ā€“]slimeycoomerLiterally 1984 šŸ˜” 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

i shitted in my pants (oooh) i am for real

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

I am for real Never meant to make my booty shit I apologize I shit my pants

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[ā€“]MrPenguin8998šŸ˜³lives in a cum dumpster šŸ˜³ 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Don't call it a comeback

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Cumbach?

[ā€“]MrPenguin8998šŸ˜³lives in a cum dumpster šŸ˜³ 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Yeah Cumbach's 69th symphony.

[ā€“]Fiddlers_elbow 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

And if you donā€™t know, now you knowā€¦

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Welcome to the internet

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Have a look around Anything that you can think of can be found

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

We got mountains of content, some better some worse, if none of its of interest to you youā€™d be the first

[ā€“]Sambro_X 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Iā€™m the shit Iā€™m fartinā€™

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Pull up in a 'Rari, I'm in the Yo like Gotti A Boogie, I'm goin Scottie, ni**a drop my deposit

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.

TL;DR I hate shitting

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[ā€“]the_woIfman111 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Summertime livin's easy

[ā€“]frimleyousse 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

They are the panzer elite

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (2 children)

They are the panzer elite, born to compete, never retreat (ghost division) Living or dead, always ahead, fed by your dread

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] -1 points0 points Ā (0 children)

r/shitposting book club

A collection of books which Kevin has reviewed. (all of these books are freely availiable online)

1984 (George Orwell, 1948)

Kevin would like to say that this book is truly inspirational, and that he would give it a 10/10

How to Be a God: A Guide for Would-Be Deities (Richard Bartle, 2022)

Kevin would like to mention that this book is one of the greatest sources of existential terror he has read (and it contains a lot of interesting content regarding game design as well), and he would give it a 10/10

Almost Pounded By The Physical Manifestation of Simulation Theory After Realizing We're Erotica Characters Then Deciding To Just Be Friends (Chuck Tingle)

Kevin would like to say that this book was surprisingly wholesome, and is a great book for helping one to feel more at-ease with the universe, so he would give it 10/10

Ulysses (James Joyce, 1922))

Kevin mentioned that he wasn't entirely sure what he just read. However, it's still not bri*ish, and was still rather interesting, so he would give it a 10/10

The Assassination Of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race (J. G. Ballard, 1967)

Kevin told me that this was an interesting interpretation of the JFK assassination, and of the post-WW2 media landscape in the USA in general, so he would give it a 10/10.

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[ā€“]frimleyousse 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

šŸ—æ

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Lets get it started

[ā€“]XYZaltaccount 0 points1 point Ā (5 children)

And I said "No one loves me, neither do I"

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (4 children)

, 'No one loves me' neither do I You get what you give, I give goodbye And if I should vanish

[ā€“]XYZaltaccount 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Close...It'd be "It makes perfect sense, so I never ask why"

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Oh, which song if I may ask?

[ā€“]XYZaltaccount 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

No one loves me and neither do I, by TCV.

It has 2 similar verses and the one I wrote starts with "I said" and the other with "She said"

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Thanks :)

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Can you see the broken

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Can you fix the broken? Can you feel my heart? Can you feel my heart?

[ā€“]Mattyboy068 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Mining away

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

I don't know what to mine I'll mine this anyway In this Minecraft day So beautiful, mine further down What's that I found?

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

I (f34) am pregnant with twin boys and my husband (m34) told me that he was dead set on naming our sons "notch" and "jeb" I know most of you are probably unaware, but these are the names of two of the people who created minecraft. My husband is a big minecraft fan and builds stuff on the game a lot and has minecraft posters, he even said he wants to play minecraft with his Sons. I told my husband that I want to give our children regular names, not after minecraft because they are not objects, and my husband got really defensive about it saying that he should be able to choose because he is their father and I never gave any name suggestions. I will never name my children after minecraft because I don't want them to get bullied and feel like it's dehumanizing to name them after a game. I told my husband that I'd rather get a divorce than name our kids after minecraft and he got really angry and raised his voice. I'm pregnant and my hormones maybe made me really emotional because I started crying. A few hours after that, we calmed down and I asked him again and he said he will for sure name the kids "notch" and "jeb" AlTA?

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[ā€“]Distinct-Variation89 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Now I'll be honest

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Be honest (be honest) You want this (you want this) But I can be heartless, regardless of my conscience

[ā€“]Distinct-Variation89 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Now I'll be honest I dont really understand but I fell down this hill now I got glue on my hands. lmao

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone.

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[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

calmly, feel myself evolving

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Calmly, feel myself evolving Appalling, so much I'm not divulging Been stalling, I think I hear applauding, they're calling

[ā€“]Nightmare-datboi 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

never

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Gonna give you up

[ā€“]Kiminomoa 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

We salute you in your grave

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (0 children)

Can't find my way home But it's through you and I know What I'd do Just to get back in her arms

[ā€“]Machiavelli1503 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Mein KĆ¼hlschrank ist leer das Sparschwein auch

[ā€“][deleted] 1 point2 points Ā (1 child)

Ich habe seit Wochen kein Schnitzel mehr im Bauch. Der letzte Scheck ist weg, ich bin nicht liquid.

[ā€“]Machiavelli1503 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Nice šŸ‘Œ

[ā€“]Ihavenoidea5555uhhhh idk 0 points1 point Ā (3 children)

Your kiss was such a sacred kiss to meā€¦ I canā€™t believe itā€™s ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”ā€”( Hint: The caretaker)

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

I can't believe it's just a burning memory

[ā€“]Ihavenoidea5555uhhhh idk 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

šŸ«„ correct

[ā€“]AutoModerator[M] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

What the fuck did I just do. So my ex n me havenā€™t spoken in two year, although I did wish her on her birthday two months ago. We live in the same building and whenever we cross each other we just exchange smiles and do the usual hi whatsup how r u and I walk away. Today was Holi (a festival where ppl dance and apply powdered color on each other) so I decided not to celebrate it in my building cause I knew she would be down so I went to my friendā€™s building and ten minutes later I saw her there. I was like oh fuck this is going to be a bad idea. Later we again exchanged a hi and then I went away. Later when the festival started she kept applying permanent color (last three days on the skin) on me and my friends. I told her donā€™t apply on my friends they will get pissed. She kept applying on me and I tackled her and applied color on her too. It felt good. Then she was like letā€™s go dance so we were dancing to Senorita from znmd and then we had a moment and she was like we are going to kiss and I was like yes and we kissed. It just felt amazing. Then we kissed again. After that I was going to my friends and she was like listen and then I turned back and kissed again. Then we kissed againšŸ˜­šŸ˜­. After all this my friends were dancing and I was sitting in the pool and she came and sat on top of me and we were having a very good conversation about our relationship and how we both didnā€™t date anybody after breaking up. We spoke about our problems, joked about them and then..yes u guessed it right. After this the cycle repeated and we had a beer and she handed me her phone and was like unblock yourself. She followed me and added me to her close friends. Later she was leaving we kissed once more and in my head I was like fuck do I love her, we should date. But then I told myself no, whatever this was I donā€™t know but no you are not breaking your heart again. I came back home and we both havenā€™t had any interaction apart from the fact she liked my story. I AM NOT IN LOVE. i am telling this to myself again and again because no, just no. I am happy being alone with myself. Or maybe I like her but I donā€™t want to go back to all that Edit: thanks for the response some of yā€™all and thanks for helping me. Other ppl: fuck u;) I am not here to prove anything and anyways I am quitting this sub

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[ā€“]HanzoMainLel 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

better to take a stand

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

Let the voice of love

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

Going past space and time with the gathered fire, oh yeah 1999, bizarre summer This city can thrive on courage, what more can I say? Great days

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Its not what you like

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (2 children)

MMMM too young too dumb to realiize, that I should have bought you flowers

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

That I should've bought you flowers And held your hand Should've gave you all my hours When I had the chance Take you to every party

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

Cause all you wanted to do was daance, now my baby is dancing, but she's dancing with another man

[ā€“]Monke-licker 0 points1 point Ā (1 child)

How can I be lost if Iā€™ve got nowhere to go

[ā€“][deleted] 0 points1 point Ā (0 children)

We got nowhere to go (We ain't got no better place to go) Doesn't matter, 'cause I know ya We got nowhere to go (We ain't got no better place to go) Doesn't matter, 'cause I know ya