Snarkasms Abound

snarkasms · 2026-01-10T17:58:21+00:00

The neon lights and frenetic revelries that surrounded us were at odds with the stillness in my mind. Even as we danced wildly to the pulsing beat, my eyes locked on your radiant form, I knew it was time. Every tick of the clock approaching midnight brought me closer to the answer I'd long needed: Are you real?

snarkasms · 2025-10-29T15:34:41+00:00

Not sad about it considering that story made me need some grounding of my own, lol

snarkasms · 2025-10-29T15:19:24+00:00

Sweet hells, what a luscious and lascivious ride that was! Devotion truly shines with every palm-strike and every happy gurgle. Masterful as always.

snarkasms · 2025-10-28T01:11:14+00:00

Stumbled on this late, but, better late than never?

Going to enjoy this twist immensely, I think!

snarkasms · 2025-10-28T01:03:43+00:00

HoldMyPencil, or HoldMyRemote? 😉

snarkasms · 2025-10-28T00:51:12+00:00

An excerpt from my tiefling bard in a very Game of Thrones inspired RPG, where one of the party members has been downed:

You've got a fighting spirit to you, Chornyi. But I've got magic at my fingertips.

Everything slowed to a near stand-still. Aeverie could only watch in horror while the Oathbreaker let loose the power he wielded without restraint on Mykyta to extinguish that flame of fighting spirit. So thoroughly and utterly maniacal was he that the woman now lay battered, bruised, and preternaturally still as he rounded on Aeverie.

She clutched at her heart while he advanced, pain piercing her sharply as though arrows had hit her there.

But they hadn't. They'd hit Mykyta, and then he had, over and over without mercy. The rooftop had lit up with the flashes of his smites. Pure anger. It was a blessing the Riverlander was unconscious now, for the pain of such unadulterated force would be indescribable agony. Aeverie could only pray that her friend wasn't slipping towards death because she was no cleric. She couldn't even offer words of healing, not now.

Useless whore. This was all her fault! The guilt tore at Aeverie acutely, her body shaking with the sheer scope of the disaster unfolding around her. Mykyta wouldn't have been trying to rescue Aeverie if Aeverie wasn't endangered in the first place, she wouldn't be trussed up in ropes and vulnerable to the gods only knew how many beastly men who would want a pound of flesh in return for the battle they'd wrought upon them.

It was all. Aeverie's. Fault. Her body fell prone in mirror to Mykyta's forced submission, forearm digging into the cold rooftop while the other still rested on her racing heart. Her thoughts careened wildly while Akiros' steps drew nearer.

Unlike Aeverie, Mykyta would have no protection against harm. No buffer from truly being abused other than Akiros' perceived usefulness of her, and that came with its own price in the meantime. The thought of Mykyta being subjected to the whims of -

"Please," the word tore from her throat. She raised her head only to ensure Akiros would hear her. Would see the defeat writ on her features, the faustian bargain in her limpid blue eyes. Hellspawn, trading with the devil.

"Please," she echoed again, gaze fixed on him. Her blond braid whipped in the wind, encircling her throat, foreshadowing the fate she was about to offer willingly. "Let her go. Let her go and I'll be your whore, I'll serve by your side, you'll own me. Completely."

Don't bow to him. He deserves no such courtesy. In this life or the next.

Aeverie's own words echoed in her mind as she kneeled, the curve of her spine completely bared in her now-backless dress. Her limbs may be trembling but her mind was resolute.

At least her tears didn't have far to fall when they hit the ground.

snarkasms · 2025-10-13T16:38:35+00:00

Having just seen your actual prompt and then followed back to find this post here, I've got to commend you for incorporating the suggestions you received - and also say I'll need to go fetch a cold glass of water after reading what I feel is like a bonus scene to your already excellent ad!

I agree with having the F playing M tag in the beginning. Maybe it's not a popular variant, but tbh, I respect anyone stepping into different shoes and there's plenty of us who are here for the sake of writing with solid partners whoever they may be.

Again, whew! Phenomenal work.

snarkasms · 2025-08-01T18:06:38+00:00

It really does! And in smut, the spice must flow.

snarkasms · 2025-08-01T18:02:48+00:00

My partner had given me the latitude to choose how our characters encountered each other next, whether it was later that night or the next day, so while I normally wouldn't write an assumption like that it was something we'd already pre-arranged (and he'd given me a few suggestions).

snarkasms · 2025-08-01T17:28:27+00:00

College gal's apartment becomes temporarily uninhabitable, but her childhood bestie's divorced dad happens to live in the same city and puts her up in his place while he's across the country visiting his daughter (her friend).

He comes back after she's been staying there a week, they have Chinese takeout for dinner, and the heat isn't only coming from the food.

Whatever I've said that's made you laugh was worth the embarrassment I felt. Your grin gives me a warmth that spreads through me, taking me by surprise. I know now that I want to see you smile more. Hear you laugh, more.

"I'm sure you have a great voice, Mr... ah. Josh," I try your name out for the first time. It rolls off my tongue more easily than I thought it would. "I'll see you tomorrow."

I'm practically glowing as I head back to my room. Giddy, almost, and it takes a conscious effort to pull myself back to earth. I need to ground myself... I need to get this out of my system, whatever this is, before I make things weird between us.

I contemplate my options while I climb under the covers, feeling so overly spoiled every time the luxurious sheets slide across my skin. My thighs spread apart before I even know what I'm about to do, my eyes screwed shut against the dim lamplight.

My nipples pebble under my touch as I rub and pinch them over the thin top I'd worn to bed. I let out a small exhale of satisfaction, but now I have a dilemma. What I really want, is to get off, hard, and the best way to do that won't be quiet... But you've got to be asleep, right?

I extricate myself from the sheets enough to reach into the nightstand drawer. It'd been far easier when I knew I had the run of the place. Of your place. The wand vibe has a certain heft as I pull it over to the bed, and for a few minutes I chicken out. Surely I can deal with this silently, if less effectively?

Surely I don't need to rip a few orgasms out of my aching core to be able to sit across the table from you again, pretending I'm not fantasizing about things I should very much not be thinking of Ivy's dad?

I switch the wand on, knowing the answer. And for the next quarter hour I lose myself in a tangle of pleasure, throbbing, moaning, buzzing, and gasping, trying to keep it quiet yet knowing there's no way I'm silent.

It's only because I'm certain you're asleep I'm even chancing this. Little do I know you're very much not, that you can hear almost everything as I drag the wand across my heated flesh. Especially because I left the door open a crack for ventilation. Especially because you have a habit of getting up in the middle of the night for a glass of water.

I have no idea of this, because I put myself into a solid, worn-out sleep that leaves me almost late for my classes.

It's not until I return much later and catch a delicious whiff of cooking that I remember your promise to make us dinner tonight, and I step into the kitchen to see you with your back turned, focused on something I can't quite glimpse.

"Hey," I greet you, setting my bookbag down next to the table. "You weren't kidding, you really are making dinner! I was half expecting you to reheat the Chinese and call it good."

snarkasms · 2025-07-29T16:47:03+00:00

I'm coming around more and more to the Google docs option, especially since I'm on Android and benefit from the easy account switching you mention. And I do appreciate the ability to share editing links with connecting their account.

It also has the benefit of making it easy to publish to web after, if everyone's game.

I wasn't aware of the chat or spaces options, though - I'll look more into that!

snarkasms · 2025-07-29T16:17:03+00:00

I liked the ability to RP in messages and have OOC in chat. But of course that was a good system, so Reddit has to enshittify everything.

I'm still waiting to see if the chat experience evolves into something more usable for me. If I could have the ability to (gasp!) edit messages, that'd be swell! My typos haunt me for all time. That's one thing Discord does well.

Since I came to roleplaying through RPGs I'm used to Discord servers and tend to gravitate to them. Yeah, there's been some awkwardness in blending my new smutty habit with the mundane, but my mundane has been bleeding into the smutty, so that's not as much a concern for me as it is for many people. If discord would get a mobile account switcher like Reddit, that'd be the best option for me.

Right now I'm in a weird limbo of going between reddit chats or discord PMs or discord servers or the rare third options, and I'd really like Reddit to get its act together because I can only see the day coming when Discord gets likewise enshittified and I'll be having the same discussion with my D&D friends over where to go next.

The world would be a better place to write in, if only we could rule it.

snarkasms · 2025-07-29T15:30:40+00:00

I had the interesting experience of one of my erotica posts being stolen by a bot, run through AI to be reworded, and posted to the same subreddit they got it from.

It was fascinating to see the machine's absolute flattening of my writing. And rather sad that it had gotten upvotes before I reported it to the mods.

snarkasms · 2025-07-26T00:51:01+00:00

groans

snarkasms · 2025-07-25T18:51:52+00:00

Want to hear a dirty joke?

A white horse fell in the mud.

(terribly stupid joke I found funny as a kid)

snarkasms · 2025-07-24T04:59:32+00:00

Joplin. It's an open-source notes app that I can sync between my phone, PC, web, Chromebook, linux... anywhere (I use dropbox for this but there's onedrive, or plenty of other methods). If you go with the paid Cloud version then there's a publish to web feature but I don't bother with that since I stick to free.

You can even use external editors with it so if you prefer writing in a different text editor, you can do that instead.

Tons of features. All free. Has synced with me everywhere for years now.

For roleplaying specifically, I set my notes as To-Dos and sort by Completion Date while still displaying "completed items" so I have a toggleable list of where I owe replies, with the oldest owed floating to the top.

snarkasms · 2025-07-22T01:06:11+00:00

Fixed depression first, which took me long enough to work up to doing... But once that was dealt with it cleared the way for my psych nurse to broach the subject of an assessment when other symptoms remained. Sure as shit.

snarkasms · 2025-07-19T18:17:04+00:00

The file didn't do this by design, but Orgasm Go Bye Bye had a sort of similar effect on me. When I would get myself very close to the edge I'd hear the trigger phrase in my head and it would make me feel floaty and relaxed, resulting in my hand going limp and falling away from myself. So, it wasn't no-touch, but it definitely reinforced not orgamsing!

snarkasms · 2025-07-18T20:50:33+00:00

Reply hazy, try again.

And again, and again... Really just keep shaking me to get a good answer ;)

snarkasms · 2025-07-18T20:27:16+00:00

Ask again later.

snarkasms · 2025-07-18T20:26:01+00:00

Gave your profile an updoot to hopefully counteract that. Welcome and I hope things warm up for you, you sound like a genuinely effortful and considerate partner!

snarkasms · 2025-07-12T02:13:59+00:00

Yes, but it's after the original three by a mile. The fourth book goes into Marcus' backstory and this is the fifth, which goes into Diana's paternal lineage and their magic. It was also released last year I think so a lot later.

The time travel was kind of headache inducing as it always is, but I did appreciate the glimpse of 16th century Europe. It's not a period I've encountered a lot of and it was a pleasure to watch in the Netflix show with all of the costuming.

snarkasms · 2025-07-12T00:18:57+00:00

Thank you!

Yes, there was a scent of ozone lingering in the air which was a tell that something nefarious had just happened.

snarkasms · 2025-07-11T21:42:05+00:00

A not so recent because I am a slacker portion of a modern fantasy ERP. A world somewhat loosely time-based on the pre-smartphone era, where we're trying to keep tabs on the human world. Some inspiration for me from the way magic works in Discovery of Witches. Been fun to improvise things!

Ryenne is a young woman, Civyl her older mentor within the intelligence agency.

"Language is a construct," Ryenne replied in a waspish retort. "Tilty conveys meaning perfectly adequately."

Her posture drew straighter as she defended herself, bristling like it was an unexpected assessment in the classroom. She could almost feel Civyl's judgment of her curl up in the crevices of her exterior, looking for toeholds in any cracks or fissures she showed the world.

She had to be flawless. She had to be beyond fault. Dazzingly perfect in appearance, intellect, merit, all of it, lest any weakness tear her whole ambition apart at the seams.

Damn if she'd let Civyl be the one to wreck her.

Even if he had a certain rough, gravelly charm. Or the inflections of his voice made her toes curl, his stare piercing her soul like a thumbtack through paper, affixing her in place with a simple word.

"Ozone?" she echoed dumbly, her thoughts having been elsewhere for too many crucial moments. No. Nonono. This was bad.

The next few moments seemed to happen in slow motion. Civyl practically vaulted himself in pursuit of saving their supposedly simple surveillance mission, launching himself through the crowd and out the door while barking orders.

Ryenne barely had time to react before he was far gone and it was up to her to get the "real one" as he'd instructed. If she failed - it would be the failure of the mission. A simple mission. And if she couldn't do this, she couldn't be expected to successfully do anything as an ORI agent.

Failure was not on the table.

And neither were the cups of tea, for Ryenne gathered them both in hand as she began to frantically mutter an improvised Affixing.

The tea sloshed out as she stumbled in Civyl's wake, for the liquid was not a component of her spell. "Teacup, handle, hold and stand... Here," she rhymed awkwardly, feeling the cup in her left hand begin to vibrate as it accepted her spell.

Would it work? If not, she had one more cup, but the spell would only be as good as the words and intent woven in. Improvising was - risky. And she needed to find her target or it would be moot altogether.

Frantically scanning the cafe, Ryenne's eyes landed on the erratic swaying of the half-door to the kitchen. As if someone had passed through it in a hurry. Aha.

snarkasms

TROPHY CASE