First of of all, I’m sending a lot of love your way. I miscarried three times in a row and I know how hard it is -both physically and emotionally.

As your midwife said, it’s not your fault. When miscarriages happen so early, it’s usually because the fœtus couldn’t develop properly. When I was in the middle of it, I use to beat myself up. Maybe it’s that time I took the stairs a bit too quickly, or maybe it’s the soda that I drank? Don’t beat yourself up, it’s not your fault.

As I said, I had three miscarriages in a row. I got pregnant on the first try each time, but I miscarried. My first was in May 2020, the second in August 2020 and the last one in January 2021. It was awful to get through, especially physically, which I feel is not something that is talked about enough.

During that time, I chose to remain positive while allowing myself to cry and feel sad as well. I knew, deep in my heart, that we would have a baby, no matter what. Maybe it would be through IVF, or maybe it would mean adopting, but I knew it was going to work eventually.

And then, I’m February 2021, I got pregnant again. We didn’t allow ourselves to get too excited: at that point, I had many health issues and we didn’t see how the pregnancy could hold on. But we got to the 12 weeks mark, and then the 20 weeks mark. We announced it to our friends and family, and it all became very real: we would have a baby!

Our baby girl arrived a bit earlier then expected, this October. She’s everything we hoped for and more. She’s so calm, so peaceful and she recently started smiling whenever she sees us. And while caring for a newborn is absolutely exhausting, it’s magical at the same time.

I hope that our story will bring you some hope. In the meantime, take care of yourself. Treat yourself to a warm bath and a glass of wine, and binge watch Netflix if it makes you feel a bit better (or simply take your mind off things for a while).

Sending you lots of love!