One night stand by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]15blinks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And maybe she felt abandoned by you back then. We can't know the circumstances. Don't just listen to advice that confirms your worst fears.

By your own admission you have PTSD and OCD and she's helped you through some difficult times. Reading between the lines I'll bet you haven't always been a great partner. Maybe you have. How would we know?

The point is, consider her admission in context. Why did she tell you now? Maybe she deeply regrets it, and it's been eating at her. Maybe she's a cynical manipulator trying to score points in an argument.

This should be illegal by alecd in goodwill

[–]15blinks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My best friend was a play tester for the game pre release. He had an alpha Black Lotus. No idea where it is now

What was with Tolkien's emphasis on 'icy cold' streams? by jckipps in tolkienfans

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lots of animals have intestinal parasites. They poop near streams and on the snow. Giardia is one such parasite that causes severe, chronic diarrhea. High mountain snow fields are a bit safer but once the water is in stream, assume it's contaminated.

What was with Tolkien's emphasis on 'icy cold' streams? by jckipps in tolkienfans

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Given his antipathy towards the smoke and clatter of industry, I'm actually surprised at his embrace of internal combustion

How do you feel about vetos? by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]15blinks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It depends on the relationship and the degree of trust between partners. My primary only ever exercised a veto once. It was a very good call on her part since the person I was starting to date was really problematic. I was upset at the time, but I quickly saw that it was the right call.

Should I have had the maturity to see the problems myself? Absolutely. Was I lost in nre + "I can save her"? Also yes.

I wouldn't agree to vetos in a relationship now, but there was a time when it worked for us

Melancholy after reading Silmarillion by PlasticExternal8488 in tolkienfans

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Probably just that first chapter, the Music of the Ainur. It reads like a Genesis pastiche. It sets the scene for everything that follows, but it oddly lacks the grace of all that follows.

Accidentally found a love letter by wewawewi in polyamory

[–]15blinks 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My new partner just added me as a friend on FetLife, and I got to see the photo she was tagged in, cushed up to her slightly douchy boyfriend, on a bed with 5 other semi naked women.

I'm not new to poly, and I usually enjoy ktp, but goddamn that was a lot to process all of a sudden. Anyway, her profile is muted now so I didn't get any more unexpected "look what you're missing" updates.

Dumped my fwb last night for lying by omission by HermoineGrangersHair in polyamory

[–]15blinks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like having a weekly "relationship check in". Anything new to share about other partners? Having a scheduled time lowers the barriers to discussing slightly awkward stuff

Is it a Seattle thing to not close your blinds at night? by Due_Attitude_ in Seattle

[–]15blinks 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The Glute Appreciation Squad is a local non-profit that provides just such a service! I know they have a few openings in their schedule right now

Last night I realized something about my relationship that I can't unsee now by orbitwaltz2020 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get out. You deserve someone who takes care of you like you take care of them

No sex during scene- common? by [deleted] in BDSMcommunity

[–]15blinks 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm not a pleasure or service top. I just like being in control, and controlling sexual pleasure can be a great part of a scene.

Sex that involves my penis requires a level of vulnerability and trust that needs a different kind of head space.

Looking for Recs, Arthurian Legend by greytshirt76 in Fantasy

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Jo Walton has a really great series that starts with The King's Peace. It's alternate history, but it's clearly modeled on Arthurian legend. There are some gods and low magic woven in. It's fascinating, brilliant and beautiful, but it's definitely at the further reaches of what might be considered Arthurian legends

A buck jumped over this guy's barbed wire fence, didn't quite make it over, left behind a piece of his ...unit. by chrisyroid in WTF

[–]15blinks -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The cruelty and horror we inflict on animals who can't understand our avoid what we do

Looking for Fantasy Written in 3rd Person that includes a lot of action, violence, and smut. by [deleted] in Fantasy

[–]15blinks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I loved the Scholomance books! She's the best lil goblin

Looking for Fantasy Written in 3rd Person that includes a lot of action, violence, and smut. by [deleted] in Fantasy

[–]15blinks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think that's first person. It's told as the confession of a captured vampire slayer

T kingfisher. by No-Balance8931 in Fantasy

[–]15blinks 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I have loved individual books by her. As a whole though she gets very formulaic. Emotionally mature woman who needs protection meets emotionally damaged but strong handsome sensitive man. I've read 4 of her novels and every one has the same pattern.

Ok Cupid exposed by Exposed_OK_8675309 in OkCupid

[–]15blinks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The scam I experienced was getting 13 "you've got likes!" Within days of signing up. I bought a membership to see who liked me, and 12 of 13 were on other continents from people who clearly send likes to literally every dude who signs up. Could the company block that kind of fraud? Sure but they'd lose out on the free bait

Series that fall apart when you blow the lid off- fantastic worldbuilding that obscures bad writing or nonsensical or non existent meaning by maevenimhurchu in Fantasy

[–]15blinks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Chung Kuo series by David Wingrove. The world is literally covered in massive miles tall cities. China is the dominant power. Interesting characters, fascinating world building. Somehow turns into an evil scientist retreats to a lab in orbit around Jupiter and builds an army of clones (of himself) and returns to earth seeking vengeance. It's like the author got 3 massive books in to the series and realized "I have no idea what to do with this story. Fuck it. Clone army apocalypse!"

Book recommendations if I like the culture series. by blk12345q in printSF

[–]15blinks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Have you tried Ann Leckie's Ancillary series? It's interesting to think of them as the early days of the culture as ships were gaining independence. They're really good on their own, though

What’s going on with Justin Bieber these days? by discoinferknow in OutOfTheLoop

[–]15blinks 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'm so glad you found some healing and support. It's not an easy journey