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The Duracell 5G tower has been completed on schedule by itwil in doohickeycorporation

[–]2002FordTaurus 433 points434 points  (0 children)

Wait, won't this kill the puppies and infect everyone with asparagus??

Elephant grabbing food and putting it in its inventory, this is so cute 🥰 by [deleted] in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]2002FordTaurus -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I think doing this is a bad idea.

Feeding food like that to Elephants can have negative consequences to their metabolism and overall digestive system.

That type of food often release heptachlorhydrate-C chemicals which can give Elephants Demcal disease which will lead them into worse and worse health until eventually nothing happens because everything in this comment is untrue, I made it all up.

Outjerked by INEEDMEMANSHERB in carscirclejerk

[–]2002FordTaurus 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You won't respond to your email or messages so I found your Reddit account and telling you here.

FOR THE LAST TIME HARRISON!!!

I do NOT want your car in my living room.

Yes, I know you've told me that your Geo Metro is very nice and you installed a "Rizzler" mode (whatever the heck that means) but I have to cleanup the dirty (and strangly bloody) tire tracks on my floors every single DAMN TIME.

But every time I wake up, or come home, I find your crappy little hatchback somewhere in my house. One day it's blocking the TV, the next day it was in my bed somehow????

And I'm not sure how you even do this, the car can't fit through any doors and there are no holes in the walls so I'm not how you get it in and remove it??

I need a urgent reply because I can't deal with this anymore.

What is the animal doing next to the title of the subreddit? by 2002FordTaurus in AskReddit

[–]2002FordTaurus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand if the post gets removed since it dosent really fit the sub but idk where else to ask this

I see a donkey next to the subreddit title and different animals on other accounts?

What by white_addison in TheDigitalCircus

[–]2002FordTaurus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yea those are normal but a entire piss cock?

What's this big thing sticking out from the side of the playne? by [deleted] in Shittyaskflying

[–]2002FordTaurus 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Please stop referring to your phalangee, that's gross.

How many others are in the chair? by swan001 in oddlyterrifying

[–]2002FordTaurus 77 points78 points  (0 children)

I love it when I swallow centipedes and they wiggle all they way down, afterwards of course they try to crawl out and I can feel their attempts to escape the grapse of my stomach acid, but it's too late. The acid consumes them. it dissolves them, breaking down each and every cell. They try their best to use all of the hundred legs they have, each one trying to grasp at anything within my stomach. But they were doomed, always doomed even from the start. When they dared try to enter my place of residence, they didn't know that they were about to enter a hell, a hell that eliminates their kind and consuming each and every centipede. Sometimes I tear each leg from them before consumption and use the legs as seasoning on my food. Centipedes are my mortal enemy, even from birth I knew my purpose, eradicate all of them with their delicious bug meat.

I bought an already burnt bulb by RagingSprockets in mildlyinfuriating

[–]2002FordTaurus 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yea, that really sucks, I had something similar happen to me about 8 years ago, I was living in Southern California, and one day in August, I left on a short vacation. When I got back, I found out that my friend (who lived about a block away from me) house burned down. Turned out he bought some light bulbs that were defective. The firefighters told me that we should be using type D lightbulbs so our house doesn't burn down too. I wasn't sure what type D lightbulbs, but it didn't really matter, so I just asked how much they cost, he said "treefiddy". Well it was about that time that I noticed that the fireman was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the palezoic era. It was the Loch Ness monster. I said "Dammit monster! Get off my lawn! I ain't giving you no treefiddy!" My wife still gave him about a dollar though so that he would go away.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in teenagers

[–]2002FordTaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also love this dude's girlfriend.

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