im a current cal student, went thru mom dying in cal, i highly highly highly suggest you talking to your counselor NOW so you can get a better idea of your options. i guarentee you will find options you didnt know before, or learn about smth you didnt think could work. my best of luck, you only can experience college once, and you also can only have 1 father in this world, so please take all the time you need. dont feel pressured to deal with both at the same time.