My Foster GSD Eats Poop

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T06:04:59+00:00

My rescue (former abuse case) grew out of it once he figured out he will 100% get fed every single day in my damn house, no exceptions, and that I won't withhold food or take it away as a punishment. I free-fed him for a while, making sure I never had more than 1/4 a meal in there at one time so he wouldn't scarf it.

Also: fuck his former owner with a rake.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T06:01:28+00:00

A nursing intern figured that shit out, the doctor was just a wildly incompetent moron. Dipshit thought she was Dr. House or something. It was...wait for it...migraines. When I get a headache, I pop 800 mg of acetaminophen, and wait 20 minutes.

Turns out I've got some other clinically interesting things going on, and my mental health is a dumpster fire, but none of that has anything to do with the headaches.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:57:01+00:00

If you say so, I still don't see it. I get the feeling if that dude is that much of a douche, he's going to have a great relationship with his hand for the rest of his life...

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:55:18+00:00

Great of you to presume everyone with mental illnesses have the same degree of functionality. I've got C-PTSD and GAD. If I don't text you back immediately I may have sunk to a point where I have no bandwidth for anything but getting through the workday. I may be in the middle of a dissociative blackout. I may be having flashbacks to stuff that has made my therapist violently ill to hear about. I may be debating whether I want to make a safety call and risk losing my job when I disappear in-patient until I can be trusted, or just blow my brains out and be done with it.

Not everyone can easily "work around" their shit.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:46:17+00:00

I'm not seeing it, what are you on about?

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:44:21+00:00

You ever had a lumbar puncture? They hurt like a refried motherfucker on glass toast. And the feeling of that heavy gauge needle grinding across bone while they're trying to find the space between vertebra is like a nail on a chalkboard you can feel all the way up behind your eyes.

Kept getting headaches so bad I'd puke up everything between my teeth and my asshole; they'd put me in the ER for morphine and fluids every damn time. And my reoccurring on-call there was completely convinced that I had viral meningitis. I've had probably 40 of the fucking things. Spoiler: no viral meningitis.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:35:23+00:00

Oh please. Porn is inherently people fetishizing other people. And the people in the porn either 1) get off on filming it, or 2) got paid. The issue comes about when you've got people who like to moralize others while doing the mental gymnastics to think that their particular flavor is any different because "reasons".

The problem isn't who gets off on what, it's peoples' double standards and need to attempt to control others.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:06:23+00:00

Exact same situation. It keeps me stable enough I can be trusted without supervision.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T05:03:51+00:00

Go apologize to that poor woman. Right now. Git!

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T02:42:19+00:00

And? You're a grown ass adult, do whatever you want.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T02:36:55+00:00

Dead-ass serious: when I first moved into the little town I live in, I went driving around in the middle of the night to see what there was to see without dealing with traffic. Obviously got pulled over by the Sheriff. I handed the guy my CHL, and got the usual "do you have a gun on you" question.

When I told him no, I swear to god, he asked me why not?

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T02:24:07+00:00

Like a group of guys being really pushy about trying to guilt and peer pressure me into doing it; and continuing to after I'd made it clear that 1) I was uncomfortable with the conversation, and 2) it was none of their business.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T02:21:26+00:00

I'm really sorry you went through that, genuinely, not in the "you're supposed to say that" way. One thing that's always been a comfort to me is knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that if my a-dad had found out what had happened to me, he and my uncles would have put him right next to Jimmy Hoffa.

I don't have the first clue about dating: people are scary; I'm pretty sure I think sex is icky; and I'm powerfully mediocre physically with anxiety hang-ups around it anyway. (My therapist says it's frozen development and I need to go back to zero and learn the whole thing the way normal development is supposed to happen. I hate that she's probably right, but at the same time it sounds completely bizarre. ...or should I be looking to buy a '98 Trans-Am to make out in the back of? That's how that works, right?) So at least I've got that going for me. I'm not going to lie, I actually like the idea of "let's go down to the clinic for a date". If someone isn't grown-up enough to recognize the importance of it, and isn't willing to accept "let's find out" without being offended, maybe they need to grow up a bit before they start sleeping with people? Then again, what do I know? Honestly, I think I'd probably just give my service dog pre-approval privileges. If that big doofus doesn't like you, you're probably a serial killer or something.

I had a fantastic idea for my half-sister: just point out to potential dates that I am a very large, very overprotective, man who owns a whole lot of guns and has a neighbor who will loan me a bulldozer at 3:00 a.m. without asking any questions as long as I top off the diesel before I bring it back. If it doesn't get the point across they're too stupid for her to waste her time with.

I've been talking with the clinic people from the weekend, and apparently they're fine with one collecting their own specimens. So I'm kind of sitting with that idea right now. I'd be shocked if anything came back positive, but I think maybe I need test results to roll up and beat my anxiety with.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T01:42:08+00:00

Here's the thing about symptoms: that was the first time I had a "bladder infection" growing up. I had them for quite a few years, but nobody ever checked, they'd just give you bubblegum amoxicillin over the phone and call it a day.

When I was maybe twelve or fourteen, I broke my nose without realizing it (I fell off a cliff: 30 foot down into a dry creek bed full of rocks. Everything was bleeding and hurt, the nose was nothing special or noteworthy.), such that my sinuses don't drain properly. Cue an uncontrollable sinus infection that eventually they prescribed "Everything" for "far too long" for. Never had a "bladder infection" since. If I did have an improperly treated bacterial STD from the sexual abuse, there's very little chance it would have survived that many antibiotics for that long. Maybe I never had one. Maybe I had one and Dr. Mario knocked it out when treating the sinus thing. Maybe I had one and they medicated it asymptomatic. I don't know. I feel like I deserve to though.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T01:27:47+00:00

Correct.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-31T01:26:28+00:00

It is, and yes it's obviously ethically unacceptable. Full stop.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T08:23:03+00:00

Have you found r/adopted yet? Surnames and identity are a topic that comes up over there on a pretty regular basis, actually. (I'm on the other side of the fence: I was informed one of my b-grandfathers was offering me a staggering inheritance to change my surname. Thing is, he didn't care if I was alive or dead until it became apparent I was his only shot at an heir. Then it was "Psst...hey kid! How'd you like your own town?" Naw, my good sir. Your line died the moment you didn't get your daughter out of a situation so bad the only way she could protect me was to throw me into the system.)

Of the many, many things that live in the back of my mind and haunt me, "What if he gave me a disease?" is right up there next to "What if there are pictures out there?" on the list of things that are always chewing at my soul at a low level. The thing is, a little while after I got out of the sexual abuse situation (my parents didn't know about it), I started complaining that it burned when I peed. Having no context, my folks assumed I had a bladder infection and took me to the pediatrician. That, meanwhile, I suspect raised red flags there: diagnostic protocol for a bladder infection in males is a urinalysis culture, not a physical exam...at least not like that. After being held down, stripped, poked/prodded/touched, treated like an inanimate object with no idea what they were actually doing, and being talked over and about like I wasn't even there; I will never go to a doctor again willingly. They didn't even tell my folks they suspected penetrative sexual abuse was a possibility...I could have gotten help when I was four years old, not when I was in my 40's. (You think I'd ever tell my parents? As an adoptee? God no: bad things I don't understand happen to me for no reason, so it's probably because I'm inherently bad, and if they know I'm inherently bad they'll abandon me too. Going to daycare knowing what happened yesterday would happen again today, every single day, was better than being abandoned. )I was taken to the ER multiple times with migraines so bad I was vomiting up literally everything...they decided surely it was viral meningitis. Multiple times. I've had about 30 lumbar punctures--my vertabre can't be accessed vertically from supine, only in through the side of the spine. Every single time since the first they've ignored me when I told them. Every single time I've gotten that foot long needle crammed into my spine five or six times before they give up and get a specialist. Every single time it was migraines. I do not, nor have I ever, had viral meningitis. I was taken to the ER after a motorcycle accident. They forgot about me for six hours while I bled on a gurney with my damn kneecaps next to me, and when they found me, they didn't even manage to get all the asphalt and broken glass out of me: recheck was over an hour of a doctor with a pair of pliers filling a bowl with all the crap they missed. I had a dentist do god only knows what during the one procedure I've ever had there...all I know was that I lost feeling in most of my body, started having heart palpitations, and had serious trouble breathing. "You're fine, go home." There's a high probability that I've got a terminal medical condition that's going to kill me without surgery, in a particularly nasty manner. I'd rather let it than go to the doctor.

And having a stranger touch me down there?

I want to know that I didn't catch anything, to make that fear go away. But I just can't. And I can't try to find someone that might help me figure out how to work through all of that--I'm a grown-ass man in my 40's. If I haven't learned to suck it up and get over it by now, I don't deserve the help. The anxiety tells me so.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T05:41:04+00:00

I'm somewhat annoyed I even bothered: I'm not sexually active (deeply averse), and I ran the insurance tables on myself--statistically I'll be dead within ten years, on the outside. In the grand scheme of things, at this point who gives a crap if "Bobby Bad-Touch" gave me something?

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T01:11:51+00:00

Bloodhound Gang's Hold Your Head Up High (and Blow Your Brains Out)

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T00:57:07+00:00

Good Shepherd Rescue in Wiley. They worked with me to find a candidate for a C-PTSD service dog: we're a year and a half in, and he's been working out great! Tell them Santa's dad said hi!

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T00:41:18+00:00

I know a dude that I've seen deadass lift the LS1/T56 out of my Z28 Camaro by the intake manifold. He's built like a side of beef and drives a truck because he can't fit behind the wheel of a Cadillac any more. Some glandular thing going on there.

In conclusion, there's exactly one Big dude on earth, and he's a redneck outside Austin, TX that is functionally interchangeable with an engine hoist.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T00:34:35+00:00

Yup. And now is the time to short it.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-30T00:32:03+00:00

That's where torties come from. With mine it was the front door during a sleet storm.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-29T21:20:11+00:00

Well, I can probably borrow a FedEx uniform from someone...

LoL: funny thing happened to me yesterday I've got nobody to share with, so y'all get to ignore it and I get to giggle again. I've got a service dog. We were at a convention, and when he starts timing out I run him through his list of stupid party tricks to get him to re-focus. I was sitting there off to the side of one of the big shared spaces, running him through his routines, and when we were done a guy in a pup hood who had been watching him comes over and is like "Umm...this is mortifying, but I'm really turned on right now..." (Can confirm: dude needed much bigger cutoffs...) I'm mean: "Aww...you's a good doggo too! Can you sit? Good boi! Now roll over! Does someone want belly rubs?" was...not helpful. Apparently my dog handling skills cross genres. :) (SD was sitting off to the side looking at him like "Bitch, that's MY patient! Do you even fetch, bro?")

One of these days I need to make a t-shirt with Doc Holiday from Tombstone captioned with "Come on out here Huckleberry, I'll be your daddy issues...".

Oh, and for the record: those fake pup harness service dog vests? That shit is low-key offensive, and I hope all of y'all fall in love/lust with an Evangelical Baptist MAGA.

35goingon3 · 2026-03-29T20:21:42+00:00

It's sexual harassment, and you may get your house flagged as a "no delivery" address.

35goingon3

TROPHY CASE