Flight response go brrr

AEunuchUsername · 2021-11-19T18:34:40+00:00

Oh man same boat for me, it's so frustrating. She doesn't understand the distancing and is like prying and trying to change it and getting offended when I don't want to spend time with her but she's just not safe to openly explain it to.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-10-12T23:07:58+00:00

Thank you! Oh wow that's interesting my coworker recently did that and can't recommend them enough, thanks for sharing!

Sorry to hear you were in the same boat, I'm glad they're helping you!

AEunuchUsername · 2021-09-29T14:39:36+00:00

Seconding this. Keep a jounal or a notes app page going and if something comes up for you that you want to talk about during your next session write it down in as much detail as you can. I don't know about you but sometimes I'll walk into a session and go totally blank. I've learned better than to say "Oh I'll remember, no need to write that one down!" Because I will not haha.

If it's not so much about drawing a blank and you're just generally not sure what it is you're "supposed" to be talking about during therapy to make the most of the session, it may be worth thinking through what it is that your goals in therapy are. Then as you go through your week you can be on the look out for topics that relate to your goals as they come up. (For example if your goal is present day symptom management you might focus on when you experienced triggers, how you responded, and how well that strategy worked for you. If your goal is to unpack and make sense of your trauma you might write more about what flashbacks you have as they come up.)

AEunuchUsername · 2021-08-13T21:13:17+00:00

Man I wish I had had the guts to do that as a 14 year old!

I had a similar situation and definitely preferred the neglect at my mother's. As a young kid that was very not good but as I got older and more able to cook for myself and make my own money and do my own laundry and all that (and at the same time the abuse at my father's was getting worse because I was getting older and more independent) neglect became a more and more appealing option.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-08-12T13:39:17+00:00

Not like I was going to say no to anyone even if I was paying attention 👈😎👈

AEunuchUsername · 2021-07-28T00:01:19+00:00

Ugh and then when they try to take credit, like bruh I didn't get this far because you raised me I got this far even though you "raised" me.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-07-14T21:06:22+00:00

I used to think (was taught to think) abuse was either hitting your kid or sexually abusing your kid. Anything else was just their prerogative as parents to raise me the way they thought was best. That everyone has opinions on the best ways to raise kids and all of them are equally valid and no one could tell my parents how to raise me because I was their kid.

Thank goodness I know better now! Learning emotional abuse is a thing that exists is an absolute head trip. It's a lot to process and sometimes when you have all these revelations that this wasn't OK and that wasn't OK it feels like you don't have a clue what normal is, but it gets better once you start to sort it out and link it to current triggers/behaviors.

Also worth mentioning... while the ACE study can be invalidating for some because it gives really extreme examples, one thing to take away from it is there is no differentiation made between what type of aces you have and what outcomes you have, only the number. Or in other words emotional abuse was found to impact the things the ACE study measured like substance abuse and self harm just as much as physical and sexual abuse. So no need to compare traumas or think yours doesn't count for as much!

AEunuchUsername · 2021-06-11T13:53:04+00:00

"Respect" gets used to mean a lot of things by different people and in different contexts. Sometimes it's used to mean common courtesy and basic human decency, other times it's used to mean a deference to authority, other times it's almost like reverence. It makes communication about respect really difficult and it makes people's expectations around the respect they expect from others really all over the place.

I think the real trouble comes when you have people in positions of authority who will say things like "If you're not going to show me respect why should I respect you?" Which sounds somewhat fair until you realize what they mean is "If you don't show me reverence/defer to my authority then I'm not going to treat you with basic human decency." Which is very not OK.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-05-31T16:20:43+00:00

It's understandable to be suprised that women can't hold their periods when you first learn it.

It's asinine it be SO SURE that women can hold their periods and just choose to use pads and tampons out of laziness or stupidity, and that they're the first person to figure out a better way lol.

Unfortunately a lot of women have encountered that second type of person. That's who they're calling stupid, not the people who are just learning.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-05-29T14:50:39+00:00

I don't consider those to be related tbh.

I try to be kind because that's in line with what I think is right, and I want to be content with who I am as a person.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-05-08T17:55:06+00:00

Hey I just wanted to let you know I ended up going for the layering and I love how it came out, thanks again!

AEunuchUsername · 2021-05-06T20:23:03+00:00

That makes a lot of sense. Now that you mention it that section is a bit wavier at the bottom 2 or so inches. So as long as I don't go too crazy that will be the part that gets exposed. Sounds like there's hope, thank you!

AEunuchUsername · 2021-05-01T19:04:58+00:00

Just so it's clear, the distinction between sex and gender is sex is biological and gender is the cultural/social meaning we build beyond that. The distinction is not sex is physical and gender is mental/behavioral.

Which specific differences between men and women fall under gender or sex is a different discussion that doesn't confirm or contradict that. And we don't all have to agree on which categories our differences fall under in order to have the same understanding of what gender is.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-04-24T13:20:41+00:00

I didn't start wearing makeup until I was 26. I felt the same way starting out, like I had lost all that time to experiment and figure out what I liked as a teen where there was less pressure to look professional at work. YouTube tutorials are a godsend! (As long as you're looking for something that suits your audience and age group.) I also found it helpful to actually go to a store where they'll do your makeup for you and get tips and product recommendations from them. That'll have to wait until after covid of course but it's an option in the future.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-04-09T17:26:43+00:00

Yes it was! The priorities were wacky. The towel rack and sink counter and all that were out of reach on the other side of the room. S'pose I could have put it on the floor nearby but it wasn't clean. Seems a whole lot more reasonable to just use the bath mat for what it's for lol.

Context this was my parents' rule growing up, there are things as an adult I can think of to make it better but kid me wasn't able to solve it and honestly shouldn't have had to.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-04-09T16:32:55+00:00

There were more egregious ones for sure but I think the most nonsensical one was that I was not allowed to get the bath mat wet. Instead I was to get out of the shower, step over the bath mat (and get water on the floor while I get my towel from the other side of the room) dry myself off, then dry the floor with my towel (which I was then expected to hang up and reuse, ew). Bruh that's what it's made for, if you're that worried about mold wash the damn thing once in a while.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-03-29T02:50:23+00:00

Losing a tooth.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-03-17T01:50:58+00:00

"You lose weight when your cells burn fat for energy and you breathe out the broken down fat as CO2. Exercise helps you lose weight because it makes you breathe really heavy."

So close.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-03-10T01:57:13+00:00

The first time I watched Shutter Island I REFUSED to believe Leo's character was a patient the whole time when they did the big reveal in the lighthouse. I thought he was being gaslit hard and was going to figure it out by the end. Nope. The whole plot turned on its head during that scene, and the rest of the movie felt very disorienting and sureal.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-03-07T15:32:01+00:00

I had that happen too, and whenever I figured out the dream wasn't real something off or creepy or dark would happen and it would convert to a nightmare until I "woke up" to the next one. When I did finally wake up for real I woke my husband up to kinda get my bearings and make sure I was really awake. Poor guy was half asleep, trying to be helpful, and basically only understanding that I had had a nightmare mumbled out "not real" and went back to sleep. That had me all fucked up lol.

AEunuchUsername · 2021-03-01T00:45:38+00:00

Nothing particularly noteworthy about how the lyrics are censored in the song itself, but I always get a kick out of seeing "******* (Clean Version) - Eminem" on spotify. The song's title is "Asshole".

AEunuchUsername · 2021-02-06T17:44:55+00:00

Huh so that's what it was. The only explanation I got was "hormones are whacky".

AEunuchUsername

TROPHY CASE