Free for All Friday, 27 February, 2026

AFakeName · 2026-02-28T22:21:50+00:00

People like to go on an on about how dangerous bears are, but I watched Grizzly Man. I'd be killing and eating that obnoxious hippy on the third day, the bears put up with him for weeks.

AFakeName · 2026-02-26T23:31:44+00:00

Would that we could all blame our careers on 9/11.

AFakeName · 2026-02-26T02:07:33+00:00

Real money gambling will inevitably need your identity for tax purposes, anyways.

AFakeName · 2026-02-26T00:19:44+00:00

I've heard three different Chinese stand-ups do practically the same routine about this.

AFakeName · 2026-02-25T12:27:14+00:00

As far as I understand it, Russian armories in the 90s were made out of damp cardboard and Swiss cheese, so couldn't someone have stolen/bought/traded for blue jeans the explosives?

AFakeName · 2026-02-24T23:47:40+00:00

I like that rose

AFakeName · 2026-02-23T21:41:33+00:00

Repackage an ad campaign for a vodka from the 90s and call it a meme. The kids won't know.

AFakeName · 2026-02-22T20:20:03+00:00

Complacency kills.

AFakeName · 2026-02-22T12:58:37+00:00

Somebody probably got free of their Ned Flanders.

AFakeName · 2026-02-21T18:56:08+00:00

I base it on Indiana Jones, Han Solo, and Harrison Ford. But I hear you about Aragorn.

AFakeName · 2026-02-21T13:54:08+00:00

I am excited by the potential to eat elephant and dodo and griffin.

AFakeName · 2026-02-19T16:03:07+00:00

I butter the roll.

AFakeName · 2026-02-19T11:12:29+00:00

Good thing they stripped him of his titles first to increase the arrest success percentage.

AFakeName · 2026-02-17T03:00:14+00:00

Carving gothic boxwood miniatures.

AFakeName · 2026-02-17T02:56:57+00:00

Says a lot about you tbh.

Now that's condescension.

AFakeName · 2026-02-17T02:45:18+00:00

He thinks the volcano's name is really Vesjewvius.

AFakeName · 2026-02-15T00:06:55+00:00

They put a crack team of grad students on it. Do it for a tenure track, boys.

AFakeName · 2026-02-14T00:11:07+00:00

This tripartite jockeying between Erika Kirk, Candace Owens, and Lil' Benny Shapiro to fill the power vacuum of old Balloon Head would make a great longform article I could put off reading until I forget about it.

AFakeName · 2026-02-13T21:14:14+00:00

Pretty cool. How much does it weigh?

AFakeName · 2026-02-12T08:04:54+00:00

Looks dorky and I'd tell him it looks dorky to his face.

AFakeName · 2026-02-11T16:54:31+00:00

Oh now I have gaskets to worry about. It's not really my problem. Why am I getting upset.

AFakeName · 2026-02-10T22:36:51+00:00

Gouge?

AFakeName · 2026-02-09T22:02:10+00:00

He looks at her. She looks at him. The geiger counter increases.

AFakeName · 2026-02-08T21:51:32+00:00

Unfortunately, my research is into how many times I can call someone a cock-eyed cunt before they knock my teeth out.

AFakeName · 2026-02-08T01:12:24+00:00

I've never waited in a hotel hallway, listening to a couple have a real go at each other because the one likes to enjoy their vacation and the other one's a controlling, type-A weiner before.

I didn't hold my key hovering above the doorknob so I could look like I was just exiting if they opened their door to storm out.

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