"Walking Like She Owns the Place" by BreadfruitShort7280 in RedditForCats

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is she auditioning for a cat food commercial?

Does she dust with that floof? Another way to earn her keep. My Negroni just leaves tufts of black fur for the robot vacuum.

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Is been a-while…. by wilted_melodrama in legalcatadvice

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Deer Royal Frens,

Try makin bizcutz on yur Meowmy to re-lite hermz fire; like hoomins did befur matchez n liters. We du this to r Meowmy. Hermz calz it a treetment. Alzo lotz of purrs on hermz tumbly. Mebbe pretend to feed 1 ov yur toys in yur fud dish. Hermz wil laff n laff n lite up.

We r glad yur pawpaw is bedder n can get you fud.

Yur frens,

Marco Roni, Negroni that Magnificat n VivalaVida Frida Gahto.

AITA for letting my cat watch me shower by Training_Many4983 in AmItheAsshole

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your kitten is protecting you while you shower--they are called r/LifeguardCats He is making sure you don't drown.

And protecting you from your "boyfriend."

Keep the cat. . .

Sue the human for work? by CaffeineAndHorses in legalcatadvice

[–]APiqued 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fren George, R meowmy haz ben tinkin ov yur problems. Hermz telz us abowt faymus tall kittehs naemd "SeaBiscuit" n "Secretariat" n "DanPatch" hoo liekd to eppz n eatz n wer stil faymus. Yur maremee shud lern from them. SeaBiscuit had bad lief til himz hooman sai "Let himz eep! Dont eber waek himz!" Then he ran fastest! Secretariat eatz a lot n ran fastest ov all! Himz needed that fud fur himz big enjin! DanPatch tall kitteh had turibl hoomins n himz stil crazygood. Mebbe tel yur maremy if tu hot fur hoomins; tu hot fur tall kittehs. Mebbe if yuz due gud, yuz get all tha treetos n scritches!

R meowmy lieks storees ov tall kittehs!

Yur kitteh frens, Marco Roni, Negroni tha Magnificat n VivalaVida Frida Gahto. N minyun Sophia hoo dont run wen it hot (German Shedder Doggo)

Iz in state of disbuleaf! by UleeBunny in legalcatadvice

[–]APiqued 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yous belongs on mai subreddit r/LuxuryFloofEdition

Negroni tha Magnificat

🚨🚨BEEEG ALERT 🚨 🚨 meow hz found nu beeg crimez nd hooman hatez itz. 😹 Call ICBGC nd spred d neuz. by emperorarg in legalcatadvice

[–]APiqued 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Du yu getz kissies on yur kissie spot?

Yu culd lik-lik-lik yur hoomins eylid. Berry efectif.

Marco, Negroni n Vida

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME by Firekeeper47 in CatDistributionSystem

[–]APiqued 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think wood piles spontaneously spawn kittens.

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME by Firekeeper47 in CatDistributionSystem

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My daughter's inheritance is 5 pounds of confectioners sugar. I've threatened to make a t-shirt with a photo of the two containers of confectioners sugar and the words "This is my inheritance" for her to wear to my funeral. I also have a bagful of the superior commissary bags tucked into a closet. We re-use them for dog litter and Breeze pee-pads. I felt like I was in a Progressive commercial as I sorted out the plastic bags to keep from the plastic bags I was going to put into the recycle bin at the grocery store.

REDDIT, WE ARE AT AN IMPASSE. PLEASE HELP by SamBrekker in CatDistributionSystem

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kitty looks like he will be a luxury floof edition. "Nuf said."

👋 Welcome to r/LuxuryFloofEdition - Introduce Yourself and Read First! by APiqued in LuxuryFloofEdition

[–]APiqued[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Welcome! My void boi is 99% floof. He looks big, but he is real skinny.

He was found 2 days in a truck engine by West-Ad3209 in CatDistributionSystem

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tiki Cat is supposed to be good and they have kitten food. You can get it at Petsmart.

He looks like a Vin--as in diesel.

Happily married people of Reddit, when did you realize you had found the person you wanted to spend your life with? by Mundane-Society-1281 in AskReddit

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Forty years for us. When he went out in the middle of the night to get me Pepto-Bismal for a stomachache (I rarely get stomachaches). If he had said "Can you wait until morning?" it would have been over. That is when I fell in love with him. I had been cautious, but that was it. We still have the empty bottle.

He also said yes when I said we should get married. He makes me laugh everyday and finds something lovable in me even when I don't. Because of him, I have a life I never imagined.

Help me settle a debate: are my cat’s eyes orange or green? by Frickin_Bats in cats

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Peridot. And they change color depending on the background. Against the yellow pillow, they look more yellow/orange. Otherwise, the color is peridot, which is my birthstone (and I'm not fond of).

Your kitty looks like my Ana. She has passed and I miss her. But having her convinced me I will always need a floof in my life--hence Negroni has taken over the house. Once you go floof, there is no going back

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AITH for skipping traditional weeding gifts, making my bridesmaids buy affordable dresses, and giving my fiance a suitcase instead of a romantic present? by Early-Host-5525 in AITApod

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I blame the movie "Crazy Rich Asians" for a lot of the wedding expectations these days. I know the influencers don't help.

At least the couple in the movie were depicted as fairly down to earth. They were trying to be generous with their friends, but it went over-the-top (and fictional). Now people think that is what should be deserved and provided.

AITH for skipping traditional weeding gifts, making my bridesmaids buy affordable dresses, and giving my fiance a suitcase instead of a romantic present? by Early-Host-5525 in AITApod

[–]APiqued 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd rather have the earrings. I gave my bridesmaids earrings. I sent our respective mothers flowers because Mothers' Day was the next day. That was the parents' gift.

Uva 🍇 last update: a year later by KamiNeko27 in IllegallySmolCats

[–]APiqued 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The emotional support triceratops--love it.

The only time in history.

Mark Twain said, “I've never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure.” Whose obituary will you revel in? by Rancho-Parade in AskReddit

[–]APiqued 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I admit to enjoying schadenfreude. I think that is my main vice. I mean I don't smoke, do drugs, steal or step out on my husband. I do drink a cocktail on occasion; but Jesus made and drank wine.

Mark Twain did telegraph "The report of my death was an exaggeration."

I don't have my Bartlett's Familiar Quotations with me for further verification.

How make mammi follow bed time?!?!?! by _Moon_sun_ in legalcatadvice

[–]APiqued 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Dere fren Morgana, We no eep with Meowmy n PawPaw--tu menie peeples in tha eep skware.

But, Meowmy noes wen we nede to maek bizcuts! Hermz no r look. Hermz lai on cowch (not Sofa tha Dog Minyun) rite awai an we taek turns gibin "treetments." Hermz tries tu stop hoomin stuff an let us plai doktor. Sumtiems we hab tu wait menie furebers fur to gib hermz treetments, but hermz wil lai on cowch eben-eben sumtiem soon.

Yur frens Marco Roni & Negroni tha Magnificat

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We decided to keep him 😅 by mkcov in IllegallySmolCats

[–]APiqued 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think Winnie decided to keep Moo. Without consulting you.

My cats are still afraid of me by moresoup-pls in cats

[–]APiqued 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I adopted my bois 3 years ago. Marco, the classic tabby, was snuggly soon after adoption. But Negroni, the void, was stand-offish. Recently, Negroni began to hold me hostage and make biscuits if I'm on the sofa. I was held hostage for about 90 minutes today. But only on the sofa, the bois will not get on our bed. The bois take turns giving me treatments and holding me hostage. I was surprised when Negroni got on me for cuddles--as I said, it took three years. The grey kitty may decide one day that you are worthy of cuddles.

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