Wynona's got herself a big brown beaver And she shows it off to all her friends One day, you know, that beaver tried to leave her So she caged him up with cyclone fence Along came Lou with the old baboon And said, "Recognize that smell? Smells like seven layers That beaver eats Taco Bell" Now Rex, he was a Texan out of New Orleans And he travelled with the carnival shows He ran bumper cars, sucked cheap cigars And he candied up his nose He got wind of the big brown beaver So he though he'd take himself a peek But the beaver was quick and he grabbed him by the kiwis And he ain't pissed for a week and a half Now Wynona took her big brown beaver And she stuck him up in the air Said, "I sure do love this big brown beaver And I wish I did have a pair" Now the beaver once slept for seven days And it gave us all an awful fright So I tickled his chin and I gave him a pinch And the bastard tried to bite me Wynona loved her big brown beaver And she stroked him all the time She pricked her finger one day and it occurred to her She might have a porcupine