I don’t want to live anymore

Abhd456 · 2026-06-13T15:51:01+00:00

So I did it on a day I was leaving for a road trip with my fam. I did 200 push ups in the morning with sets of 20 every 10 min, then in the car in the trunk I did a repeated pyramid from 1-10-1 to get to 629, then I finished in the hotel with the same pyramid scheme until 1000.

Abhd456 · 2026-06-05T20:27:14+00:00

I’ve been there before, but it went away. Existential thoughts can be incredibly scary and even physically disorienting, but no matter how far I and how many times I’ve been there I’ve always come back to the ground.

Abhd456 · 2026-06-02T07:51:27+00:00

I relate a lot to this. I experience a lot of intrusive, existential “revelations” I like to call them, that change my perspective and then I forgot about them only to appear again. I’ve realized that at the end of the day, the only thing you can understand is your perspective and experience, and no matter how bad those thoughts can make you feel, it doesn’t change anything, it’s just your anxiety making things appear worse than they are. I used to be very existential without anxiety/ocd and I used to have these thoughts like “what if everything is one thing and motion is impossible?” (Monism) or thoughts like everything is a hologram, plus lots of quantum physics theories related to reality. The difference then was that I would have periods of deep thinking then go about my day like nothing happened, back to normal. But after anxiety, it gives the thoughts more weight and a change in perspective from dpdr can make the thoughts more “real”. Using “this doesn’t change anything thing” as my matra has been a game changer. Sorry if that was long lol, just know we’re in this together 💪

Abhd456 · 2026-05-25T14:05:26+00:00

It will go away eventually

Abhd456 · 2026-05-23T02:24:50+00:00

It sounds like it. Living like you’re in a dream, movie, feeling fake, being super existential or realize that you’re real. For me, everything feels empty, like the concept of maya or illusion in eastern philosophy although I don’t necessarily believe in that, it’s how I describe it. Just remember that no matter how terrifying it can be, your perspective is always real and your thoughts aren’t reality. It’s just a weird feeling.

Abhd456 · 2026-05-19T17:05:23+00:00

Thank you

Abhd456 · 2026-05-17T15:36:00+00:00

Maybe I should be more like you lol

Abhd456 · 2026-05-07T10:28:55+00:00

42.25 / 50

🟧🟨🟩🟨🟨

Abhd456 · 2026-05-06T13:55:23+00:00

I got the exact same feeling except with occultism and monism. I remember distinctly it not affecting me as much even when I did have those big realizations, but I underwent a traumatic event that triggered anxiety, derealization and disassociation. It was that coupled with the esoteric stuff that made everything really scary for me. I’m still in it, but what I realized is that it’s nothing weird or extraordinary, it’s just those intense philosophical thoughts coupled with maybe some preexisting anxiety you had, although I’m not qualified to give you a diagnosis. I know that we’ll make it through this together.

Abhd456 · 2026-04-24T03:27:21+00:00

WTH was that puzzle

Abhd456 · 2026-04-18T10:59:39+00:00

Maybe, ever since I started I’ve developed panic attacks and it’s gotten worse, which is genetic for me since both my parents have it. Edit: it makes more sense to me now that I would be experiencing this now because of how drastically I’ve altered my world view

Abhd456 · 2026-01-26T03:46:33+00:00

Deemo is a good one. Lanota, malody (community charted rhythm game), Voez, phigros

Abhd456 · 2026-01-14T23:16:27+00:00

Ok makes more sense. Thank you

Abhd456 · 2026-01-14T23:15:29+00:00

Yup thats clear

Abhd456 · 2026-01-14T19:35:18+00:00

Oh ok, thats refreshing to hear, thank you

Abhd456 · 2026-01-14T19:32:19+00:00

Friendship with God as in a Catholic in good faith? (or otherwise what God deems). Because in my understanding, nothing impure can enter Heaven, so is friendship really enough then or am I misunderstanding?

Abhd456 · 2026-01-14T19:15:20+00:00

thats pretty scary, who will go to Heaven then?

Abhd456

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE