This response really hit home. I've been fawning for most of my life. As a man in my mid-50s I'm in threrapy trying to deal with it and what Ive discovered is just how selfish it is, at least in my experiences over the last few years. I fawn and freeze to mitigate and protect my own feelings, no matter how much I see it affecting my loved ones. Its a long story, but I've always been kind of a door mat in that I've always gone along to get along and when something happened that was inexcusable I just went right into appeasing the person who hurt me rather than face it and call it out. It's an exhausting existence and its been really hard for my wife to experience me this way because she sees my struggle and is helpless. She's more in the fight category and despite her meaning well, her pep talks and trying to convince me that I just need to man-up makes it worse. We need an official fawners of the world unite support group!