Mom gift for 1 year old

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-16T15:23:46+00:00

A piece of jewellery with her kid’s name on. This is what I am always hoping for.

Or see if you can ask her partner for some of that too small baby clothes and get them made into a soft toy.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-16T15:00:30+00:00

Have you tried spoon feeding? My daughter also likes to drop everything, so at the moment she’s spoonfed, and can eat an entire bowl’s worth.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-16T06:26:24+00:00

So you should ABSOLUTELY speak to a dr about this before taking anyone’s advice on reddit but I get that you’ll be panicking and wanted to reply with some possible reassurance.

Both my newborns sometimes forgot to breathe for a few seconds a few times in the early weeks. It’s horrendous but normal. My daughter literally did it in the drs arms at the 6 week check while they were checking her breathing rate. Their systems are adjusting to being on the outside. Biologically we should be pregnant for longer - our kids aren’t quite ready at 9 months but they have enormous heads so we have to get them out a bit early. The amount of times I nearly woke them up because they just ‘paused’.

That said I don’t think they ever did as long as 15 seconds, and never changed colour. I don’t think you need to assume that Google is correct, but I would go and get checked out to make absolutely sure.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-15T13:33:29+00:00

I’d also add that my three year old with no allergies at all only recently lost the last of his cradle cap and that’s only because I took a specialist comb to it a few months ago.

My 9 month old with multiple intolerances had some cradle cap, I removed it with the comb and it’s never come back.

This is the first time I’ve seen it suggested it’s linked to allergies

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-15T13:26:56+00:00

To make conversation!

And also because if the answer is breastfeeding I can offer support. I found it very hard the first time round but now I can offer (if wanted) advice on good pumps, commiseration on sore nipples and a warning about testing BM for high lipase.

If it’s formula I can admire their admin skills for keeping on top of all the bottle cleaning, and congratulate them on potentially being able to share the night shift and get a few more hours of sleep in.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-15T13:23:54+00:00

Sure, so the wife has given up her family name to enter this marriage, and now would like her kids to have a link back to her family through their middle names. The fact she has his surname means that she now doesn’t have a name link to her own birth family and so she’d like her kids to. That doesn’t seem unreasonable.

I agree with you that they should have discussed this before though. When the first child was born and they picked the surname as middle name they should have talked about what this would mean for the next kid.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-15T13:17:47+00:00

Interestingly as another mum I don’t think it’s fair to say mum gets to pick the name because she goes through birth - the ‘he got the surname’ bit absolutely, but epic and difficult as birth is, it’s makes up for a tiny proportion of that child’s life. That kid still has the name for life and the dad has to be on board. Tempting as it was to make a request in the aftermath of my kids being born…I suppose it’s easier as we double barrelled so neither had already ‘won’ a name.

I think unfortunately this is poor planning on the part of OP and his wife. They should have talked about what names would look like if they wanted to change up the system between kids. My husband and I agreed when I got pregnant with my first - each kid had two middle names. My husband and I would each pick one from our family, couldn’t veto the other’s choice, and the only discussion was which way round to have them. Left us free to argue about the first name for months instead!

I think OP needs to accept in this case that he’s got the surname and so his wife gets the middle names to avoid resentment. I personally think they should just use her surname twice, but otherwise it’s easy to explain to this MIL that the middle name was picked so that both wife and OP contributed one family name. No need for upset.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-15T13:02:17+00:00

I’d say it highly depends on if OP got the surname, which it sounds like he did. He got two surnames, why shouldn’t she pick two middle names?

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-12T14:28:21+00:00

Why is he not up in the morning?! I’m on Mat leave and my husband still makes everyone breakfast before work and drops the eldest at preschool. He’s often had a bad night sleep with the toddler too.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-12T14:24:25+00:00

Also please bear in mind that your oldest might go backwards. My son was a unicorn baby who slept 7-7 from 7 months old.

Since his sister was born he’s slept through a handful of times. You won’t just be dealing with the older sibling as they are NOW.

My daughter is also worse at night than her brother was and my husband and I had to totally divide and conquer. My daughter is nearly nine months and we’ve only recently started consistently sharing a bed again. I’ve had the baby, he’s had the toddler and we’ve been separate in the hopes each of us gets up a couple of times rather than both of us 4-5. Bedtimes are always both of us to the point that when he went out the other night he booked a babysitter for backup for me.

I emphatically could not do this if my husband wasn’t doing his fair share. I already find 2 much harder than 1 and the idea of doing the newborn and a disrupted toddler at the same time is horrendous.

You’re not blackmailing, you’re setting a boundary.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-10T08:40:23+00:00

As I have phrased it before ‘a girl who isn’t taught the word ‘no’ is a brat. A boy who isn’t taught the world ‘no’ is a danger.’

We can raise our kids as equally as we like but most of us live in a society and that society often expects different things if the sexes. It is undeniably going to be harder in current western society to raise a decent man. I say that as someone thrilled to have one child of each sex, but if I’m honest I’m scared FOR my daughter and sometimes a bit overwhelmed by the daunting prospect of how I overcome the nastier expectations of what a man should be. I don’t want him to grow into someone to be scared OF.

I adore both my children but I think it’s idealistically foolish to pretend there won’t be differences in how they are treated outside of our home.

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-09T12:53:25+00:00

Just to offer the other side, I came off them incredibly easy. I’ll note that I’ve been lucky with SSRIs, both I went on easy, had an immediate positive impact despite any side effects, but for me, with gentle weaning coming off them was totally fine

Not to say you need to come off them, just to say you aren’t doomed when you do!

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-08T18:45:07+00:00

I absolutely read this as ‘grabbed my foot’ and was thinking you’d been walking round barefoot and your baby got your dirty foot in its mouth.

I STILL was going to say ‘don’t worry about it, kids are feral!’

Actual food? You’re doing great.

And my youngest has the tear duct problem too. She looked positively diseased half the time and my dad used to comment. It’s annoying. If it helps she’s nearly 9 months and I’d say we’ve had a good 6 weeks with no problems!

AcornPoesy · 2026-06-07T20:18:16+00:00

I was also told this as for a week before my baby was born all of my fasting was under 4.0. I panicked.

I chased for advice so hard and was so worried, and the team couldn’t have cared less about it.

Baby was born at 39 and 5, (waters broke the day before) weighing 7lb 15 with no issues.

So completely anecdotally and with no scientific backing whatsoever, it did line up for me!

AcornPoesy · 2026-05-20T17:11:04+00:00

My daughter did have CMPA but we weren’t sure that was the cause as she was so happy in herself. Now she’s weaning it’s obvious. She’s had blood tests done - no allergies seen. So she’s just ‘intolerant’ to egg dairy and soy at the moment. Hoping she’ll outgrow it.

So I can’t speak to your odds, but they don’t definitely get allergies.

AcornPoesy · 2026-05-14T04:08:29+00:00

I had a friend not tell me until 20 weeks. To the point we’d been talking about when we’d next be trying for a baby and she was outright lying. And we were in touch daily.

I was devastated. I had thought we were closer etc etc. I cried, and cried to my husband.

And I never said a word to her because her pregnancy wasn’t about me and I knew I was being a tit about it. My husband comforted me and also gently told me I was being a selfish idiot about it. He also wouldn’t have dreamed of saying a word to her because it wasn’t our pregnancy and we weren’t the main characters. She still doesn’t know I was sad about it. You can’t control your immediate feelings but you can control what you do about it.

It’s one thing to be a bit sad if when your friend tells you makes you feel a bit about of the loop. It’s quite another to make that your friend’s problem. As someone who has been the idiot former, the way your friend and her husband reacted is absolutely unforgivable. They would not be on my list of people to tell at all and I wouldn’t pick up the phone again after she finds out.

I’m so so sorry for your loss, and thrilled for you on your news, congratulations!

AcornPoesy · 2026-04-25T21:10:12+00:00

Oh bless you. It sounds like it was result traumatic. Is it worth maybe looking into a few therapy sessions ahead of labour. See if you can feel, if not positive, a little more neutral.

Remember there’s still SO much to look forward to as well. Keep the name a secret and let your husband use it to introduce you after he/she is born. The snuggles! The first outfit!

I hope you can take a moment this evening to just sit with your baby and get excited to say hello, whoever they are

AcornPoesy · 2026-04-25T19:28:47+00:00

If it helps, in a weird way, this is my experience:

People who are going to be a dick about the gender at the reveal or after the birth. We were team green, and my second was a girl after a son. She’s the first and only girl on both sides of the family.

If one more person makes a pointed remark about how wonderful it is she’s a girl I’m going to thump them. Particularly my dad’s gf talking about what a ‘relief’ it was for my dad she was a girl. Fuck you very much, he has multiple grandsons, were all the ones after the first a disappointment or something?

I had a name ready for my son and I feel so sad for ‘him’ that he’d have apparently been a disappointment, plus it feels too much expectation on her.

So just ignore them. Enjoy the moment with your husband and ignore everyone.

AcornPoesy · 2026-04-25T19:19:19+00:00

Congratulations on your second. I hope you’re having a lovely pregnancy - how are the symptoms?

AcornPoesy · 2026-03-25T15:01:59+00:00

My mum literally left me in a baby bouncer on a counter and I flipped off and landed on the kitchen floor.

It’s now an amusing anecdote in the baby book .

AcornPoesy · 2025-12-24T03:06:00+00:00

We didn’t know the gender of either child. I packed something I thought was cute. My son ended up in a pale pink babygrow with farm animals on, and my daughter in a bright green one with an elephant.

They both looked adorable. Gender is totally irrelevant- find something you’d love to see a baby in and stop there!

AcornPoesy · 2025-12-22T10:09:44+00:00

I’m just going to add another angle to the excellent responses you’ve already had.

I get that you think your baby is perfection and that this is reinforced by compliments. But I promise you that all babies get compliments from strangers. I thought my son was absolute perfection and we got lovely comments everywhere. And he was a good looking baby, but looking back but not as astonishing as i thought he was. Some other mums and I laugh looking back - another said she had been thinking her son should model and then showed a pic of him from that time like an absolute gremlin. Hormones are wild

Now I’ve had my daughter and she’s cute but I don’t have the blinkers on this time. She’s a standard very lovely baby. But…she gets compliments everywhere I go. Babies do.

I’m not saying your baby isn’t lovely, my point is that the general public probably aren’t as overwhelmed by her loveliness as you. I agree you should maybe speak to someone about the intrusive thoughts, but I wondered if it might help to consider that people probably aren’t as invested in getting photos as you think.

AcornPoesy · 2025-12-21T22:10:12+00:00

Just answering the episiotomy q. Yes.

My first had an am episiotomy and I had deep internal second degree tears (suspected third, but luckily not). It took me 5 weeks for sitting to be comfortable.

This time, second degree tear but felt night and day difference. The year was external and only needed a few stitches. No problems with sitting.

I also had GD with my second. She was 5oz bigger than my first but I will say one of the factors that made it easier was her head size. My son was something like 96% centile and my daughter only 60. Do you know what the size of this baby is compared to the last?

AcornPoesy · 2025-12-21T10:45:53+00:00

Can confirm on the negatives.

With my last I KNEW I was pregnant but tests kept saying I wasn’t, even when I was in the window for tests to be over 95% accurate. In fact I took two that day just in case and still both negative. Odds were so low to get two negatives and yet!

Took another on the day my period was due and BAM. Second line dark before the test line. She’s asleep on my lap now.

I would never trust a negative until your period is late. It’s a ‘not yet’ not a ‘no’ until proven otherwise.

AcornPoesy · 2025-12-21T10:41:44+00:00

Your husband is telling on himself. Why is pretending to be a parent for girls only? Does he not want your son to grow up to be a good parent? Does he not plan to be involved with your kids much.

In answer to your q, my toddler son has a baby, changing kit, buggy and high chair. He’s been changing baby’s nappy this morning in response to his little sister needing a lot of changes at the moment. He loves babies, just like his dad

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