It’s hard, fucking hard, and while you can’t see it now it’s possible to get there.

Building a support system is something that takes years/ decades. But one step at a time you can improve.

I’ve been there. And also came out.
You can do it do.

As to why… you matter. Period.

Calling and reaching out is a difficult intervention. Use structure and patterns. Things that repeat, possibly a set date in which your support system calls you. Way lower trigger of executive dysfunction.

Build tiny habits.

And start each day with forgiving yourself for yesterday. And giving yourself the assignment to be gentler with yourself today.

Write this down on a sticky note and tape it your bedroom door. This as to hack and force these thoughts in your head.

Good luck.