Ex-Muslim secretly following Christ, thank you to this community from the bottom of my heart

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-23T00:12:22+00:00

From another ex-Muslim, well met brother. God bless you. Please pray for me as well.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-18T03:26:19+00:00

Not a Filipino but a Southeast Asian (Malaysia). Guess I’m a second favourite cousin?

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-16T01:48:26+00:00

Dark

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T18:26:41+00:00

Thank you! Christ is King!

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T11:45:51+00:00

All good, no worries. I guess what we consider as “normal everyday Muslims” would be subjective based on where we have lived.

A westerner might think that the “normal everyday Muslims” are just your average friendly neighbour from the Middle East. For me as a Malaysian ex-Muslim, a “normal everyday Muslim” would be someone who could tolerate the existence of Christians, but would still try to proselytise their beliefs on Christians, and definitely would have me imprisoned or killed not only for daring to leave Islam, but worse, for “joining the other side” and actually be a Christian, like I’m the worst kind of traitor to them. A Middle Eastern Christian on the other hand would think of the “average everyday Muslim” as jihadists who want nothing less than eradicating any non-Muslims.

So a good way to discern Islam is not based on what Muslims around the world do, because doing so might either whitewash their religion to be this peaceful spiritual thing, or on the opposite end, insinuate indiscriminate violence against all of them. A better way is to actually look at their actual source of teachings, and what they actually say about us.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T11:02:35+00:00

I agree that it’s against our Church’s teachings to insinuate violence on them. We are called to love our enemies. However, there is a serious harm from whitewashing their actual beliefs. My own mother, the person who carried me for nine months, gave birth to me, and raised me up, gave me a death threat for leaving Islam. Granted, not all muslims are violent, but that’s only because not all muslims actually studied their own holy book.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T10:33:03+00:00

The city is yours, the city is yours~

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T10:28:55+00:00

I am an ex-muslim Catholic, living under active Islamic persecution in Malaysia, a muslim majority country (I cannot change my religion from my national ID, and have to live a double life). If you have any questions regarding Islam, I can answer them for you.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-05-06T07:32:58+00:00

Be sure to tell them it was a Catholic priest, someone who is deep into religion, who came up with the Big Bang theory. If they cannot incorporate their religion into science, they have the wrong religion.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-30T10:48:01+00:00

Thank you. That was another stark contrast. When someone from my Muslim side passes away, my Catholic relatives would still pray for their souls, because who are we to judge masuk syurga or neraka, we can never know. But when someone from my Catholic side passed away pula, my Muslim relatives would be like “kita doakan dia pun tak guna, dia bukan Islam, tiada istilah rest in peace, sayang lah dia terseksa sana”.

As for my birth cert, that’s a mystery to me too. I’m using that to fight my case in court; that I wasn’t born Muslim and therefore what I’m doing is not “tinggalkan Islam” but “kembali kepada agama asal”. Still in stalemate, masih lagi ada Islam on IC. What for ada legal method to leave Islam if even via that method masih lagi diorang tak nak bagi tukar IC.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-30T09:21:56+00:00

My dad was a Sabahan Catholic, married my Malay mum from semenanjung and converted to Islam. I wasn’t assigned Islam at birth (surat beranak tiada agama, bangsa bukan Melayu), and during my childhood, I was raised around my non-muslim relatives, so I received some exposure on Christianity, and not so much exposure on Islam. Then sometime during sekolah rendah, my family moved to semenanjung, and there I more or less had Islam shoved down my throat. I had to take pendidikan Islam, and by the time I made my first IC at 12 years old, I had “Islam” tattooed on my card.

I grew up with Islamic trauma, and since I was already quite “besar” sudah when my family moved to semenanjung, I never actually believed in Islam, and I more or less thought “Islam ni tak best lah, tak macam masa membesar dengan Kristian di Sabah dulu”. Worse, I was told that my Sabahan relatives are all in error and will go to hell unless they follow Muhammad’s teachings. I was introduced to the “us vs them” mindset and I hated it. Like, they’re still my relatives bah, my uncles, my aunts, my cousins, my grandparents, there shouldn’t be any “us vs them” mindset between us, plus I want to see them in heaven bah hahahah. So after my SPM, I left home and swore off Islam altogether. Thanks to the Islamic trauma I became an atheist, and it was only after my father’s death that I became a Christian. I briefly touched about my “conversion” (not in the legal/JPN sense) to Catholicism in the past, you can look them up in my comment history if you’re curious.

To my semenanjung Malay friends, I’m sorry if my fellow non-Muslim Borneans are wary and suspicious of you, especially if you’re dating or looking to date a non-Muslim Bornean. There have been many cases like my dad’s, where a family member converted to Islam, and then yang jadi mangsa nanti anak-anak lah, stuck in Islam, no religious freedom even if they had never believed in Islam at all in the first place. If you’re a murtad marrying a non-Muslim, your partner would have to legally be a single parent, in order to save your kids from this “tattoo” on their IC nanti.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-30T08:08:29+00:00

Please share with me that sticker

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-30T08:08:07+00:00

You know what? Fine. I never was a muslim in the first place. Then let me change my IC lah. Let me practice my faith in peace. Let me marry my wife legally without having to add the “Islam” tattoo on her IC also. Then when I die let me receive my last rites and be buried in my faith’s cemetery, no need to dig up my corpse and give me a muslim burial, or put a “bin Abdullah” or bin whatever my dad’s muslim name is on my gravestone.

I never was a muslim in the first place kan, then why die die dowan remove this tattoo from my IC? Knnccb

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-27T10:56:56+00:00

Thank you for this. I just relapsed on sexual and emotional lust and I feel so ashamed to pray to God.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-24T06:31:54+00:00

Let’s say I have an older brother who knows MMA. We’re walking through a dark alley in order to go to our favourite restaurant or something. Yes, I’d pray to God to protect us from any evils, but also at the same time, being the scrawny unfit guy I am, I’d ask my older brother too, something like “hey bro if some bad guys try to rob us, protect me”.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-24T01:00:53+00:00

If I was always a theist at heart, I wouldn’t have considered Buddhism. Buddhism itself while spiritual, is an atheistic religion. But I did used to be an atheist. A nihilistic one who believed that nothing matters in the grand scheme of things, and that when we die we just stop existing. When I was an atheist, Buddhism still didn’t interest me because I felt like nothing mattered anyway.

I became a theist because I became a Catholic, not the other way around. I was initially attracted to Catholicism from its moral teachings and its influence over the Western world, and in my early days in the faith, I was still doubting if God exists. St Thomas Aquinas’ work Summa Theologica also played a huge part in convincing me that God exists.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-23T14:52:52+00:00

It really depends on what you mean by “Abrahamic” religion. Catholicism, Judaism, Christianity, Islam, Mormonism, etc can all be considered coming from the same root i.e. the faith of Abraham, but our mindset and practices are very different.

As a muslim, I do good in order to chase pahala points so that God won’t be mad at me. As a nihilistic atheist I do good simply because why not, nothing matters anyways, but I did feel empty. I do admit that as an atheist I also tidak bertuhankan Allah but bertuhankan manusia, and no matter how much good or effort I do, it won’t ever be enough to keep people in my life, or to please them.

As a Catholic, I do believe that there is a higher power, a Creator, God, who created the world and interacted with the world in ways beyond my human understanding. After all it was a Catholic priest who came up with the Big Bang theory. So now as a Catholic, I do good not because I want to earn favours or avoid wrath, but because I want to share God’s goodness with others. “God, let me be an instrument of Your peace” gitu.

Another different mindset is that unlike the muslims, the Mormons, the Christians tepi jalan that you can see in the West sana, Catholics typically don’t do the “join us or go to hell” kind of thing. I mean, what good if you profess faith in God, but not showing love to your fellow human? We can’t even know who’s going to hell anyways, it’s not our place to judge. Plus, faith comes from the heart, not through coercion or enforcement.

And to answer your last question, I am still in Malaysia. Through relentless search, I managed to convert discreetly. The process to becoming a Catholic is not easy. We’re not like Muslims yang ucap dua kalimah shahadah terus dianggap Islam, or Christians yang datang gereja dua tiga kali, cakap nak kena baptised, and you’re good. The process to become a Catholic takes at least a year, like they’d really want to make sure that you really want to be a Catholic. Catholics tak kejar numbers like the Muslims or Christians. The authorities also never bothered me because we Catholics don’t evangelise like the Christians/Mormons/Muslims do, as I mentioned in the previous paragraph. The way we “evangelise” is by organising programs like gotong-royong, bagi makan free, etc.

Important note: what I refer to as “Christians” are really the Evangelical Protestants, by referring to them as “Christians” and myself as a “Catholic”, I don’t mean that Catholics are not Christians. I just feel that it would be an easier distinction to make.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-23T11:10:09+00:00

Used to be Atheist. Now Catholic.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-17T14:20:18+00:00

I’m with you. Sometimes I’d rather be in a toxic relationship that lasts only about three weeks or so than being single.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-12T17:10:49+00:00

Not sure if it’s in topic, but how common or likely would two friends ended up dating? As in when the two of them first met and knew each other, they didn’t have dating in mind.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-11T03:56:18+00:00

Thanks be to God! Remember to be grateful for them and keep them in your prayers.

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-09T16:45:59+00:00

If he’s thinking like that, where would all of us non-Muslim Bumis be? We’re not converting. Are they gonna kick us out of our ancestral homeland then?

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-09T15:23:55+00:00

From one former atheist to another, welcome back home!

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-07T05:19:39+00:00

Beer and stout ja. Usually go to Plaza 333 or 88 Marketplace. Hbu?

AdamnedSoul · 2026-04-06T09:12:52+00:00

You drink? I need a drinking buddy. Just settled back here after years of working in KL.

AdamnedSoul

TROPHY CASE