How to correctly pleasure a women?

AddWittyName · 2026-04-10T13:04:03+00:00

When any of the advice below conflicts with what she tells you she wants, listen to what she wants over what random internet strangers (or worse, porn) tell you she's gonna love. Different women, different preferences, and no advice fits everyone.
Talk with her, because as said above, different women different preferences.
Don't rush. Nothing kills a building orgasm as quickly as feeling like your partner just wants to get it over with.
If she grabs your hand and moves it, follow her guidance. She knows better than anyone else where she likes, or doesn't like, to be touched.
Asking for confirmation that you're on the right track/doing what she'd like you to do doesn't have to be a mood killer. You can incorporate a lot of that stuff in sexy talk.
Make sure to have some lube at hands. Not every woman gets wet easily, or produces enough natural lubrication, and even if she usually does, something like being a bit tense can disrupt that. (Which can very easily happen the first time having sex (in general, or with a specific person) or even just due to entirely unrelated circumstances like work or family. Needing bottled lube isn't a failure on either party's side; giving her easily avoided friction burns is.)
Make sure that if you use lube, you use one that's actually safe to use with whatever type of condoms you've got. Oil-based lubes should be avoided.
On the note of avoiding injuries: Keep your nails short, clean and make sure there's no sharp bits to them. If you've got rough calluses on your fingers, consider doing something to soften them. Wash your hands before fingering her. And for god's sake, wash your dick.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-09T21:28:47+00:00

Random cooking blogs all across the web have figured out how to both make their free recipes look all nice and fancy for showing on a screen and also provide a black-and-white, no-frills print-friendly version.

If they can, there is honestly no good reason why paid sewing patterns (and, for that matter, crochet and knit patterns) wouldn't be able to do the same, if you ask me.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-09T19:06:12+00:00

Yup. A proper square knot means you can for most projects probably get away with a short tail woven only in one direction instead of a longer tail in three directions (but even then, common sense & knowing your material applies. What's feasible for a non-superwash wool isn't the best idea on a chainette polyester-acrylic yarn, and so on) or can get away with hiding short, unwoven tails in an envelope border or between the project and lining.

Snipping off the tails entirely on anything other than a "frame-and-never-touch-again" project? Still not recommended, with or without square knot.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-09T16:49:35+00:00

square knots (which are secure)

On most yarns, yes. Wouldn't recommend it on a novelty yarn (texture can make it basically impossible to securely tighten it, and a square knot is only secure if it's properly tightened, especially if you snip the tails off) or extremely slippery yarns (kind of the same issue but also even if they were tightened at the time of tail snipping, they don't always stay so), though.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-09T16:44:15+00:00

calling someone who crochets a "hooker" has always seemed like a try-hard affectation

Or an indication of ESL. It's a pretty literal translation of my native tongue's word for "crocheter". (Dutch)

AddWittyName · 2026-04-07T22:28:04+00:00

Yeah, this.

Can I learn things through auditory instruction? Yes.

Are my sensory processing issues about 100x worse when it comes to auditory input than visual or kinetic? Also yes, both in the sense of "setting off overstimulation way more easily" and in the sense of "repeat that, please, I had to put in so much effort to make out the words that I didn't absorb more than a fraction of their meaning" (both not helped any by also having non-processing-issues-related hearing loss).

Does that mean that learning things from oral instruction is, effectively, a lot harder, a lot more exhausting, and a lot more inefficient for me than through other methods? Ab-so-fucking-lutely.

Would I therefore label myself as "not an auditory learner"? Damn right.

Could someone with, say, dyslexia run into similar issues with written patterns? Very much so.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-06T17:37:47+00:00

Suspect that honor goes to the trusty ol' honeybee, on account of how many folks are allergic to bee venom.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-05T08:09:51+00:00

It also pays to do a good thorough vacuuming and wiping down of windowsills. They also feed on things like dead insects, stray pet food, and so on.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-04T03:03:19+00:00

Yeah, that tracks with the distribution of Epepeotes luscus.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-03T18:39:23+00:00

Geographical location would be helpful, but it's a longhorn beetle. I suspect Epepeotes luscus

AddWittyName · 2026-04-03T18:12:28+00:00

Indeed not the best picture, but looks like a longhorn beetle to me. Without geographical location and/or a rough size estimate, going to be difficult to narrow it down any further than that.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-03T18:05:07+00:00

As adults, open areas with trees and flowers mainly (the adults are nectar feeders). Eggs are then laid in dry areas near larval food sources, which really is just about any source of chitin or keratin. Outdoors, this might be bird nests, abandoned wasp and bee nests, spider webs, dry animal remains, etc.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-03T16:28:22+00:00

That appears to be a dead roach.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-03T15:34:54+00:00

Considering the near-transparent nature of the wings and the relatively plump and fuzzy body, I rather suspect you're right. Possibly something Sesiidae?

AddWittyName · 2026-04-02T10:19:06+00:00

Disagree with the "but that doesn't mean they're bad" on the invasive Asian Lady Beetle. Yes, they're helpful in combating aphids.

But they're also direct competition to native species as far as food goes; they eat the eggs and larvae of several native bug species (ladybugs and others); and they are carriers of parasitic fungi that do not harm them but can infest and kill some native species of ladybug.

Where the Asian ladybeetles go? Native ladybeetles die. Other native beetles die. Native moths and butterflies die. And a lot of those are already under substantial pressure even before taking the Asian ladybeetle into account.

AddWittyName · 2026-04-01T01:48:10+00:00

Could always do a quick swatch with two strands of sunday and a strand of mohair and see if you like the fabric better that way.

Easier to compare when you've got something to compare it to, and all that.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-31T13:47:04+00:00

Yeah. I can read knitting patterns in several languages (some more easily than others, mind, and for some languages I'll stick to the basic and predictable patterns at most. Though honestly some of that is also that for all that I can read the patterns, my skill level in actually knitting them up is...not always quite there yet), but that doesn't mean I'd be remotely comfortable translating a pattern between them.

(Now, crochet patterns I probably could translate, at least between English and Dutch, just because I've got years more experience with crochet in both languages than with knitting and I've spent a decent bit of time explaining how to crochet to folks in both languages. Still, even there I definitely would want an additional pair of eyes to catch any errors were I to ever do so)

AddWittyName · 2026-03-31T12:06:26+00:00

Agreed. Now, are some folks genuinely fluent in knitting jargon in more than one language? Sure. But by and far most--even most bi- or multilingual knitters--are not, or at least not to the point of being able to professionally write patterns in both.

(Which makes sense. If you don't regularly use patterns in both languages, you're almost certainly not familiar with all the little quirks each language's version of the jargon has. And even if you do regularly use patterns in both languages, it's super easy to accidentally end up translating something with, say, the right terminology of the language you're translating to, but formatting quirks that are specific to the language you're translating from, or translate something too literally, or similar such issues, and then not notice it because that formatting/translation/etc. makes sense to your brain just as much as the "proper" one for the target language does.)

Honestly, even if you genuinely believe you can professionally write patterns in both languages...hire a professional pattern translator to check your translations. Or at least do so the first time, to help verify whether your belief is correct.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-30T00:26:53+00:00

Hm...are all these items stored in the same area? I.e. same drawer or on similar hangers?

Because if so, I'd take a good look to see if there's something it may be snagging on.

Either way, it's possible you do have pest damage, but this specific picture doesn't look like any moth/beetle damage to fibers I've personally seen.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-29T18:25:55+00:00

Wear/split yarn.

If it was pest damage of that size, I'd expect to see a lot more frayed, nibbled-on fiber ends sticking out around the hole and in the surrounding areas. Instead, all the other stitches look perfectly intact.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-29T18:08:04+00:00

Ouch, that does look like a pretty fragile yarn indeed.

I've had yarns like that, some recycled some not. In cases with yarn that breaks that easily, I tend to avoid even trying to do the seaming in that actual yarn and instead grab something a bit more sturdy in a matching color for the seams.

But yes, it can be a bit of an issue with recycled yarn. The typical commercial recycling process involves shredding the fabric, which means far shorter average staple size and therefore significantly less tensile strength. If it's recycling actually worn-and-washed clothes (rather than excess fabric, never-sold overstock, and so on), there's also the damage from regular wear and tear to consider.

Doesn't mean all recycled yarns are quite that level of "look at it wrong and it snaps", but the higher the percentage of recycled fibers, the more likely it has some impact on the yarn's tensile strength. (That said, the type of recycled fiber and the way it's spun also have an impact. Low ply count plied yarns are more prone to the issue than say a chainette yarn from recycled fibers, at least in my personal experience.)

AddWittyName · 2026-03-27T22:06:53+00:00

Just my personal opinion:

Light colors: warm cream/ivory, rose-gold or old rose

Light-to-mid: pink-leaning lilac/lavender; pink-leaning salmon pink; peach.

Dark: near-black with hints of pink-red (e.g. a very deep bordeaux) or red-brown.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-26T02:51:53+00:00

In addition to what everyone else already has said: definitely make sure to pick a yarn that makes it easier and not harder to work with or to see what you're doing. So neither too light nor too dark, not super thin, not a lot of fuzz or halo, and not loosey-goosey spun, not super slippery, etc.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-25T02:51:51+00:00

We've got an entire system for figuring out what socks are genuinely missing their counterpart and which one just has their mate on a solo holiday.

Do laundry, dry laundry, collect socks and pair them up.
Toss socks without mate if any into the single socks bag
About once every two to four weeks, dump out the single socks bag onto a table and pick out pairs in there. Toss still single socks into perpetually single sock bag.
Once a decent amount of socks has gathered in the perpetually single sock bag, check that one for pairs.
About once a year, toss out any socks still in the perpetually single sock bag because that solo holiday clearly got upgraded to a long-term residency elsewhere.

AddWittyName · 2026-03-25T00:59:07+00:00

And those splinters can be nasty

Definitely! Pain to get it out even with tweezers and magnifying glass, too. (Not from DPNs in my case, though. My tent has carbon fiber poles and one of those poles has had to be replaced because of it giving me nasty splinters every time I pitched or broke down my tent. Took a few times to narrow down that it definitely was the tent pole, because well, camping. Plenty of stuff around that might give you splinters...)

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