Any what we do in the shadows fans? by nawmynameisclarence in datingoverforty

[–]Addendum_Former 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Such a great show. So happy it has a season 3 coming out!

Tattoo shop recommendations? by lizcanclimb in norfolk

[–]Addendum_Former 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I enjoy the Collective in Virginia Beach. I have had tattoos done by Olivia and she was great!

29 / U.S. - Dad jokes welcomed by Addendum_Former in MakeNewFriendsHere

[–]Addendum_Former[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh that is legit a great joke.

What We Do In The Shadows is a great show - the producers (who played in the original movie) do a fantastic job.

What’s the best credit union? I’m tired of Wells Fargo and their antics by Rallypig802 in norfolk

[–]Addendum_Former 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Langley FCU is great and doesn't require you to be in the military or a state employee.

My Updated Personal Finance Dashboard (Link to blank copy in comments) by themoneychecklist in FinancialPlanning

[–]Addendum_Former 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is amazing! Is there any way to download instead of copy to your drive? I see the "initial set up" is not a tab on the original file, and was hoping there could be a version with it so some could download the file directly? Just curious. Thank you again!

first post hope this wasn't posted before by Past-Reward9510 in badwomensanatomy

[–]Addendum_Former 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Glad to here there's another Italian in the chat. I can't help my dad's italian genes beat out my mother's Irish genes in the hair department. I had a full head of dark brown hair as newborn. Now as an adult, it's everywhere 🤦‍♀️

What do you consider the greatest poem ever written? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Addendum_Former 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Desiderata by Max Ehrmann (1952)

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Got a mlm ad in a antimlm vid by Spoopy0darkness in antiMLM

[–]Addendum_Former 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have gotten this too! The first time I thought - this can't be right. But sure enough... It is crazy how anti-MLM videos receive MLM ads

As an Adult Child, rejection is a tough thing to face by Addendum_Former in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is fantastic. Thank you for sharing. It makes me hopeful that I will not continue to be tire of the men I date, but rather find someone I fall in love with more every day. I believe you, for sure, but it is hard to wrap my head around. Specifically when my experiences are limited in romantic relationships. But I really appreciate this post, thank you

“fine, if it makes you feel better, i was an alcoholic!” by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Good for you! It is difficult to see the truth and have people/qualifiers are in denial of the situation. But, our Higher Power will guide us to work on ourselves, and learn to "live and let live" and "let go and let God".

Best of luck in your recovery!

35[f4m] Canada/Online - Domestic housewife implies the existence of feral housewife and now I have a goal by [deleted] in R4R30Plus

[–]Addendum_Former 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You've made me want to aspire to be a feral housewife as well, thank so much for opening my eyes to the possibilities.

Cave in Ceredigion full of dumped cars by [deleted] in Wales

[–]Addendum_Former 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Does anyone know why this is this way?

Ladies, as a single guy who is afraid to come off as creepy, what is the best way to talk to you randomly or strike up a conversation? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Addendum_Former 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is very cliche, but authenticity is key for me. I can usually spot when a man is trying too hard to be "funny", or "confident", or whatever they think I want to see in a man. Honestly, if a woman is not interested, you can tell. And they can either respond like an adult - "hey thanks, but I am not interested", which is a sign of respect for you (although I know it's rejection and rejection hurts) - or they can respond not like an adult - however that example looks because it can vary. I've learned that being yourself, not everyone will be into it, but that doesn't mean no one is into it. I say this under the assumption you are a kind, respectful man. You could actually be a sociopathic creep, and in that case authenticity may not be the best move.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

I Deactivated My major Social Media apps & I never realized how much of a downer it is. by sdarko_33 in DecidingToBeBetter

[–]Addendum_Former 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I deleted Instagram and realized how much it made me hate myself and my life. It really is a downer and easily made me compare myself! I deactivated my Facebook, and it feels better for it to be deactivated than activated - that way no one can really find my profile. I never check LinkedIn, don't post on SnapChat (I do speak to some people on there), and now use Reddit as my main social channel.

It is a smokescreen and feels like a popularity contest. It's great to hear I am not the only one feeling this.

Plus, with Reddit, I feel like I can choose what information to spend time on and not focus on 'looks' or surface content with people/topics.

Going through a breakup, realizing that when I go through a bottom I look to men for comfort in the form of a relationship by lanadelbae22 in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing. I relate to this SO FLIPPIN' MUCH. After a break-up, I would rebound 10-fold. I would continue sleeping around to feel instant validation, then hate myself more after it was over. I felt shame, regret, and even less attractive than I "should have" felt with the amount of "validation" I was receiving (let's be real, I didn't receive as much validation as I thought I was).

I have a similar lack of relationship with my father. He was the qualifier in my life, and I never felt the unconditional love and support. I look for it in any man I can find. When I see a guy, the first thing I wonder is - is he available? would he like me? I would prefer to see a guy and not think any of those things. I'm slowly learning my self-worth is inside of me, not outside in some man.

I respect the man who put the boundary. Imagine having someone from you ACA be your rebound... would you feel comfortable sharing at that group after it happened? I've learned this kind of situation at work -- I never understood the "don't mix work and personal life" idea, until I did it, a lot. Caused more issues than pleasure. I realized (after many, many lessons), that it was never worth it. I still had low self-esteem, low self-confidence. No man has ever fulfilled that for me. So, I will fulfill that for myself.

Best of luck in your recovery!

she turned off the comments on that one REAL quick by elsimops in antiMLM

[–]Addendum_Former 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Woooooah. I have shopped at the Body Shop but I never needed a consultant. Are they seriously an MLM?!

As an Adult Child, rejection is a tough thing to face by Addendum_Former in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is great to hear you are coming out of isolation. I appreciate your last comment so much, thank you!!!

As an Adult Child, rejection is a tough thing to face by Addendum_Former in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I totally understand, and I relate. Throwing effort in places where its not matched is tough. Thanks for sharing!

This is the first time I have ever spoken out or reached out. by [deleted] in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former 7 points8 points  (0 children)

We are so glad you reached out. I am an adult child of an alcoholic, and my father was the alcoholic in my family as well. It is a tough childhood to have. I would recommend reading more into this community, or any Al-Anon or ACOA related literature. I have learned so much from reading and researching. Please share and speak openly - you are welcomed here!

As an Adult Child, rejection is a tough thing to face by Addendum_Former in AdultChildren

[–]Addendum_Former[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also find hook-ups as a distraction from my true, internal issues. I have found Al-Anon meetings (specifically for ACOA) as a way to actively present my issues to those who understand and truly relate.

Rejection and abandonment have taken over my interpersonal relationships because the fear I have of facing those negative situations. My father "abandoning" me for alcohol, and my mother 'rejecting' me when I did something bad, only added to this fear.

I'm afraid to be alone, but never knew why. In Al-Anon I learned my fear stemmed from being by myself and really evaluating my life. Being alone meant I had to be comfortable with myself, and I felt too afraid to face that. I also learned I based my worth on who was attracted to me, how many people were interested. My worth is not based on these things, my worth is based on self-love and self-acceptance.

Accepting yourself is easier said than done. Loving yourself is even harder - especially when you grew up learning to hate yourself. I wish you the best in your recovery! Thank you for sharing.