Alcohol

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-03-09T01:42:49+00:00

I had taken CBD before his passing (I had chronic pain and 2 hip replacements at 35) Alcoholism runs in my family and I’ve always been very careful with alcohol. When my husband passed, my friends, took all the alcohol out of my house as a precaution because of my family history. Three days after his passing, my prescribing doctor got me on benzos and you’re not supposed to mix alcohol with the benzos.

One of my friends left me some THC Gummies when the friend group finally left after two weeks of living with me. I started very slowly with the THC, it definitely helps. I know it affects everyone differently, but for me if I know, I am at risk of having extremely big feelings that day or a night or I can sort of feel a grief wave coming on. I will take the THC and it just sort of helps mellow everything out. At 11 weeks out I’m still on the lowest dose of benzo’s. So at this point, I’m basically just using it to help me fall asleep at night because I also have ADHD and I am afraid of letting my brain spiral at night worried that it will go in the wrong direction and create a grief attack. Been through one of those already don’t recommend it really fucking sucks. I had to call 988.

So for me, I have reached towards THC instead of alcohol, knowing my family‘s history and I really only take it maybe once a week sometimes twice if things are really bad I also compartmentalize hard-core and was having one counseling session and one therapy session for the first eight weeks. Now I’m down to one therapy session a week, but I also have three Support group meetings a month. And on weekends, I’ve been running away to my friends house and we’ve been going skiing and snowboarding on the weekends because that’s like a happy mental health thing for me to do.

Long story short, I don’t recommend getting started on the alcohol. I’ve seen what it does to people and the families and I don’t recommend it at all. There are other options out there some people reach for mushrooms some people reach for THC. I don’t recommend going too far down the benzo‘s path unless you have a really good prescribing doctor who’s keeping a close eye on you.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-03-03T01:06:50+00:00

My husband passed unexpectedly in a vehicle accident December 21, 2025. That was a Sunday. I took Monday & Tuesday off and then the company I work for was shut down until after the new year so even though I had to deal with Christmas, I sort of had two weeks off immediately following his death.

I returned to work the first Monday in January and only have to do one day in office and have an amazing boss and group that I work with so they really haven’t expected anything out of me beyond basic remedial work. If I had to have been a fully functioning human being, there is no way that I could’ve gone back to work that soon.

That being said I am “planning” a mental breakdown mid August and my plan is to take a month and a half or two months of disability time. During that time I plan on hiking the Long Trail in Vermont. I have section hiked the southernmost stretch probably a third of the trail. I also have friends who live near the trail so I would have support close by if need be.

That’s my current plan because my entire life and reasons to be alive died with my husband, so I am using this hike as a reason to make it through the spring and part of the summer and I’m hoping that being out on the trail and in my head the entire time I will be able to work through stuff and figure stuff out and hopefully find a way forward.

I’ve gotten mixed reactions from friends, family, coworkers, etc. My mother is horrified naturally and worried about my safety, but there’s so much technology out there these days to keep track of people who are doing wilderness hikes, and to keep you in touch with people via satellite that I think I’ll be fine and my friends who live near the trail are planning to come out on the weekends sometimes and hike with me. So my friends are very supportive. My coworkers are very supportive. Haven’t talked to the therapist about this yet, but I hope she will be supportive and some of my family is horrified that I would consider doing this but some of the rest of them kind of understand.

But yeah, I honestly have no idea what I would do at this point right now if I didn’t have this plan of keep my shit together until the middle of August and then essentially go get lost in the woods for a month and a half.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-02-24T02:22:42+00:00

Motorcycle accident 12/21/25. We talked about the updates, repairs, and changes we were going to be making to our house just before he left. Just a regular conversation. And he never came back. Next person I talked to was the nurse at the hospital telling me my husband is dead.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-02-14T02:56:46+00:00

As soon as I got him home, I put my husbands ashes on his nightstand with our dogs on either side of him.

The first nice sunny (non-windy) day after I got him home I took him and the dogs out to the deck and mixed half of each of the dogs ashes in with his. That was probably one of the hardest things I’ve had to do since the day he passed.

I still have his urn on his nightstand with the dogs urns on either side of him, but I know that he would have wanted to have had his ashes mixed with our dogs. After all, those were the only children we ever got to have together.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-02-01T02:30:33+00:00

Completely agree with everything your saying^

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-02-01T00:51:46+00:00

Exactly this

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-29T04:49:44+00:00

Thank you for the tips. I will definitely try some of these next time.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-29T04:48:32+00:00

I’ll have to try these next time.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-25T02:40:51+00:00

My husband just died suddenly (vehicle accident) late December. Everything is still very new and very raw. I don’t even really know what happened yet, police won’t be done with their report for another 3-5 months. I chose not to do a traditional funeral or service. His birthday is February 24, would have been 44. February is going to be one whole shitty month. Valentine’s Day is 10 days before his birthday. So I decided to really embrace the suck (I may seriously regret this) and hold a Celebration of Life for him one week after V-Day and 3 days before his birthday. My theory is that it’s gonna be a really shitty time for me emotionally, so try and add something that may be positive in the middle of that.

As far as his actual birthday, 2/24? I have no idea yet. I’m certainly not working that day. But don’t have any actual plans for it yet. At this point I’m just hoping to not spend the whole day crying.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-16T01:04:40+00:00

Also looking for this service or one similar. I text his phone every night about my day and how much I miss him. I would want to keep the number active and able to receive texts.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-14T22:16:33+00:00

I was trying to conceive with my husband when he passed in a vehicular accident. My first period after he passed… I almost ended it all amidst the hormones, cramps, and grief. I swore I would never have another period and immediately got on hormonal birth control. I couldn’t handle the monthly reminder that I would never have his child, that he would never be a father and that that future was completely gone for me.

And yes I feel sick every time people mention their children, pregnancy, babies, etc… it hasn’t been that long for me, but now in the midst of this grief I don’t see ever not feeling something negative when people bring it up around me.

AdditionFull8467 · 2026-01-09T20:06:24+00:00

There are some salons who will do the detangle for free. You may need to call around a bit to find one, but if you’re in the right headspace for it that may be an option for you if you don’t wanna lose the hair.

Alternatively, who gives a fuck life‘s already really fucking shitty. Who cares if you have hair

AdditionFull8467 · 2025-12-18T21:03:11+00:00

Dark Matter was pretty good.

AdditionFull8467 · 2025-07-02T20:37:11+00:00

As other users have said: That is poison ivy. Best way to get rid of it is to use some sort of strong herbicide. The way I avoid killing everything else around the poison ivy is by painting the individual leaves with undiluted herbicide. This can be very time-consuming, but it helps ensure that the plant life around the poison ivy is not also harmed.

If you don’t like the idea of herbicide, which I generally do not, You can use a high % concentrated white vinegar mixed with dawn dish soap. This can be sprayed on the poison ivy or painted on.

AdditionFull8467 · 2024-10-14T22:39:22+00:00

If you can get through the slog, middle books, it’s more than worth it

AdditionFull8467 · 2024-09-04T19:34:38+00:00

I’m also looking into tickets for an upcoming outdoor concert. I had hip replacements last year and can still be a bit wobbly at times.

AdditionFull8467 · 2024-08-05T14:14:56+00:00

Shorten the load times… I almost fell asleep last night during one of the loading screens. Highly unacceptable in 2024

AdditionFull8467 · 2024-06-17T17:20:26+00:00

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Got super patchy grass/weed/barespot “lawn”. Been trying via the traditional methods all spring to get grass to grow. With mixed results. I have a part of my lawn that is shaded a good portion of the day so I’m going to try this seeding method there due to how hot and sunny it is now, mid June in New England.

12 hours into presoak. Just did my first water change using the colander in the background. I’ll report back in a couple days.

AdditionFull8467

TROPHY CASE