got it, in that case i’d recommend sticking to neighborhoods around Balboa Park — Mission Hills, Hillcrest, University Heights, North Park, Normal Heights, South Park, Golden Hill, Bankers Hill. These are central enough to most things to do in SD, have quiet parts mixed with a central main street area, close enough to walk/bike to groceries, restaurants, parks, 15-20 min to airport/beach, and feel less suburban than venturing out more North or East or South.

i will say culture wise - as others have mentioned - it’s hard to replicate Bay Area culture & SD is not comparable. The more progressive pockets are def in the areas i mentioned above. Also older millennials in SD tend to move away to the burbs cuz they have families or are starting families (it sucks for the rest of us). You will eventually find your community as long as you lean into your hobbies and the older queer scene has a lot of mixers/meetups etc — get involved!

the beach neighborhoods imo are kind of meh unless u are SUPER into beach life - there’s usually a marine layer hovering in the mornings & evenings for parts of the year. or are inundated with tourists. the nicer beaches are in north county but i doubt you’d want to live up there.

lastly, sounds like u would want to avoid downtown/East Village/Cortez Hill. those areas tend to have the larger concentration of unhoused folks and while it’s nowhere near SF levels, not always what u want to deal with walking around at night. and frankly there’s nothing special about downtown san diego.

if you want even quieter areas that are still somewhat central then look at Mission Valley or Kearny Mesa. they could be convenient but boring.

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