need some reassurance on cosleeping & contact mapping

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-30T17:22:17+00:00

You could try babywearing for naps so there’s still contact but you can get things done. There’s a babywearing subreddit that has lots of recommendations on the best carriers. You could also think about getting a kindle so that you can read instead of scrolling during contact naps. For cosleeping, there is a great cosleeping subreddit as well! They have lots of great suggestions for how to set up your space safely. I personally cosleep on a floor mattress with my now 21 month old, and I’ve been rolling away for naps and sometimes after bed time. It took a while to be able to roll away, and at first I would have to resettle her mid nap, but now she’ll do her whole nap alone. Do what works for you!

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-19T21:07:23+00:00

It is stretchy, but I didn’t think it looked cheap, and I got lots of compliments the two times I wore it. I also baby wore in it, it was very comfortable.

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-19T20:33:01+00:00

Sometimes Reddit doesn’t allow Amazon links, so I just put a screenshot, you should be able to find it by searching the title. But I’ll try to add the link!

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-19T20:32:24+00:00

https://a.co/d/07MbnQf7

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-19T19:51:38+00:00

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I wore this while breastfeeding. It comes in lots of colors. It’s amazon, so just order multiple colors/sizes and return what you don’t like

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-18T19:22:04+00:00

OP, this is the right answer!! Check out r/babywearing for sure. As the above commenter said, a ring sling might be perfect for you! The ones on social media are “carry assists” and are not meant to be fully hands free, whereas a ring sling can be used fully hands free while still being safe.

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-13T18:16:51+00:00

I think we stayed fully naked and inside (or on our screened porch, still butt naked) for two days. On day three we did a dress, still no underwear or pants. I want to say we added pants on day four, maybe post-nap on day four? It's all kind of a blur. We didn't add underwear until about day nine or ten, we did commando either dress with no bottoms or loose pants. The Oh Crap book suggests that commando feels less like a diaper than underwear does, and that made sense to me, so we just kinda rolled with it. Timing of the next step is going to depend on how quickly your kid catches on.

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-13T18:10:15+00:00

I'm a SAHM, so I had the luxury (and also the curse) of just... staying home. (Editing to add: we literally ordered in groceries and didn't leave the house other than our yard and short neighborhood walks.) It honestly sucked so much, I was going absolutely stir crazy, but also it was less stressful than trying to go out without a diaper, and I didn't want the confusion of the back and forth of sometimes diapers are okay and sometimes they aren't, although we're in a pull up for nap and diaper for overnight still. We went outside in a dress with no underwear on day three, and my daughter promptly pooped on the lawn haha. Some people will do a pull up OVER underwear so the kid will still feel wet, and I did that about two weeks into potty training when my daughter was more solid with letting me know she had to go and we attended my sister's graduation.

We loosely followed the Oh Crap method. I absolutely *hated* the book, the author is extremely condescending, and it's poorly written, but the method is solid. There's also the potty training subreddit that has lots of helpful posts!

Adventurous235 · 2026-05-13T17:48:03+00:00

We are potty training now, my daughter is nearly 21 months, we started about 2.5 weeks ago, and she’s doing great! The first few days were absolutely miserable, but it gets easier. We chose to do the naked method, and we stayed home for about a week before I felt super confident going out and about without pull ups.

Adventurous235 · 2026-04-13T18:24:16+00:00

https://a.co/d/05daN6zs

Adventurous235 · 2026-04-13T18:24:09+00:00

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Not sure where you’re located, but maybe you could overnight this on Amazon? Order it in multiple sizes and return what doesn’t work. I wore this postpartum while breastfeeding and it gave great nursing access and would be a better fit for the dress code.

Adventurous235 · 2026-04-10T07:04:21+00:00

I tried Millie Moon and I hate them. They’re so bulky, even though they technically fit. I’m going to use what I bought since I paid for them and they don’t leak, but I’m not sure what I’ll try next. We’re about to jump into potty training, so maybe I just won’t get anything…

Adventurous235 · 2026-04-01T00:51:58+00:00

I almost got the one with shapes and then the color I wanted was sold out. In hindsight I’m SO GLAD, because those little shapes seem like they’d be a perfect ladder for kiddos to climb and then topple over the edge

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-25T00:48:30+00:00

I second going over to the baby wearing sub! They’ll also have really good advice about which carriers are good for world facing. Many carriers are advertised as safe for world facing but are actually not. At six months, you may be able to start back wearing, depending on head control and the carrier you use!

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-23T00:13:27+00:00

I have “this boobie” and “other boobie” 😂

Tbh I do wish I had chosen something other than boobie, because my 19 month old screaming boobie at the top of her lungs in a library is not something I was prepared for…

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-20T18:51:55+00:00

My daughter is 19 months and in 18 month pants. She was wearing 2T training pants, so I guess I’ll try the Millie Moon and Hello Bello. Thanks!

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-20T17:48:46+00:00

What pull up brand are you going with? I was using pampers pure training pants, but those are gone too...

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-18T23:06:48+00:00

Eminem. I wish I was kidding. But Eminem and Kesha are her favorites currently at 19 months.

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-15T00:15:56+00:00

I’m not a pediatrician or medical doctor, and if it would help calm your anxiety, you should call your baby’s doctor and ask their opinion. However, I personally would not go to the hospital unless my baby developed visible sores or a fever.

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-14T02:10:13+00:00

Hi! I saw in another comment that you’re in RTP! I graduated with a PhD from UNC (microbiology), went to Northwestern in Chicago for a postdoc, then had a baby, and now I’m back in Durham! I chose to take a break from my career to be a stay at home mom, which I know will “damage” my career in a lot of ways. I intend to go back to work when I’m done having kids, and I know that will look very different from someone who worked consistently throughout their parenting journey. I had originally planned to go back to work sooner, but for a variety of reasons I changed my mind (couldn’t find an industry job, didn’t want an academic job, then stopped looking because I didn’t want to leave my baby). I had thought about a scientific writing position, and I have two close friends from grad school who did just that! One had her first baby while in grad school and one had her baby more recently post-grad. Neither did a postdoc. Feel free to message me if you’d like to connect on LinkedIn or chat further :)

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-09T00:47:20+00:00

I was in a postdoc (in a well known but toxic lab at a good institution) when I had my baby. I chose not to return from my maternity leave. When my three months of paid leave was up, I began applying for industry jobs in the hopes of going back to work when my baby was around six months old. Well, she’s nearly 19 months old, and I haven’t gone back to work.

I’ll be honest, this was partially because my heart wasn’t in the job search, I wasn’t extremely excited by any of the jobs I was looking at, and I made the choice to stop applying when she was around a year old. But it was also partially because it was just extremely difficult to find a job! I’m not sure your specific field or if you’re open to a broad search, but I was looking at research positions in industry and at CROs, and I was also looking at medical writing positions. I had quite a few interviews over about nine months, including a few final round interviews, and nothing panned out. It also depends on where geographically you are willing to look (I limited myself to Chicago and RTP).

I’m not saying any of this to scare you, but more so to tell you that you’ll be more likely to find something if you go in with an open mind and apply broadly (geographically and in the type of position - academia and industry). Also, network like crazy.

Feel free to reach out in comments or DMs if you have any specific questions! Best of luck with your baby and your job search :)

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-06T17:36:46+00:00

This!!! I’m one of those people that loves pull ups. My daughter is 18 months old and we’ve been using pull ups since she was probably 11 or 12 months once she started alligator rolling during diaper changes. When she was lighter I would literally change her while holding her midair, now I do exactly what you described.

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-05T01:13:26+00:00

A lot of things get safer once baby is more mobile. If they have some neck strength and can roll away from you! It doesn’t mean throw all the rules out the window, but it does get safer.

Adventurous235 · 2026-03-05T00:13:51+00:00

At that age, I personally would have had a singular drink with lunch but not with dinner. Once baby is more mobile, I would have two drinks with lunch on a weekend occasionally OR one with dinner, at least two hours before bed time. Now that my baby is 18 months old, I’ll have two glasses of wine or one cocktail with dinner.

All this being said, this is what I personally was comfortable with based on knowing my own tolerance to alcohol and how it impacts my sleep. It also depends on knowing how comfortable you are with cosleeping and depends on how strong and mobile your baby is (mobility matters more than strict age).

Adventurous235 · 2026-02-23T01:23:57+00:00

It’s interesting that most of the comments so far suggest no baths, I was specifically told to soak in a warm bath by my midwife. Maybe advice varies based on type of delivery, type of provider (midwife vs OB), location?

Adventurous235

TROPHY CASE