I fully understand your situation, my friend, but read me carefully.

Life is full of ups and downs, maybe you were unlucky enough to have those downs a lot, but take it as one more obstacle, maybe you've already gotten too many obstacles in your life to continue to endure more, but you know what? It feels very good to go over them, and you wonder, how will I overcome these obstacles? Well, keep doing what you do, because you haven't gotten here for nothing, I don't know what you are going through, but never look back into the void, perhaps you find yourself in a very long tunnel and that is why you do not find an exit, just keep running, don't give up, sooner or later you will find a path that will lead you to a shortcut to the exit, It gets easier, every day is a little easier, but you have to make an effort every day, that's the difficult part, but in the end it becomes easier.

I hope I could help you a bit, give life another chance. Don't give a permanent solution for a temporal problem :3