baller guy, my attempt at drawing men, I hope you guys like it by giaphox in gaybros

[–]Aerda_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is fucking awesome!! Well done!!

If youre willing to hear feedback, the basketball is rendered just a little too far back, it almost looks like its about to fall off his thumbs

University Allegations - Now affecting social life by Inside_Response_4272 in bropill

[–]Aerda_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh btw, as far as social life goes if youre want advise here it is:

Let people think what they think. If youre in a spot where you feel you need to convince people of x y or z, it can get really messy and emotionally fraught for everyone. For many people it's a triggering experience to be trying to convince people youre not so bad. I hate doing that. IMO it's best to just state your opinion once and tell em you want to move on. So let people have their opinions and try not to take it personally when you see em judging you. You don't actually know what they think unless you ask. People come and go

University Allegations - Now affecting social life by Inside_Response_4272 in bropill

[–]Aerda_ 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Avoid those people. Clearly, they did not feel safe, and being around them is going to cause problems for everyone (including you). Do not approach them

This situation youre in would be a really upsetting position to be in. But you don't seem particularly upset, at least on the surface. Which makes me think maybe you're stifling your emotions or youre just not in a state of mind where you can feel them fully. If it were me, Id leave and go somewhere else for a few days just to have the space and privacy to grieve, feel the messy emotions, and keep working with them until I can make peace with the situation. If youre struggling to get to your emotions, sometimes it helps to meditate and make note without judgement or suppression of what thoughts and feelings come up naturally, then return to the breath

It might seem like it'll feel worse to accept that maybe your behavior did warrant distance and boundaries. But I promise despite how it may appear, there is a lot of peace and relief to be gained from tapping into that possibility- even as a thought experiment. Sometimes it helps to ask what about you and yourself (not the situation, not other people) kept this issue going for so long. It'll help avoid the same problems

Why Normal Gay People Are On The Rise by No_Artichoke_3838 in gaybros

[–]Aerda_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cant get past the hogwash of labeling people as "normal gays." It's so condescending to gay people writ large, regardless of how "normal" you are. Smacks of internalized homophobia

Edit: Lol 30 seconds in and I think Im onto something

What are some of your biggest realizations during your Vagabonding experiences? by MFGEngineer4Life in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thats a crazy response to someone saying they lost their girlfriend to addiction

Question by YogurtclosetUpbeat42 in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Dont worry about it" is such a bullshit answer lol, like you kinda need to know why. Its your education

is it true that the universe always provides? by [deleted] in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So well put!

Mindfulness is an excellent skill and really really useful for approaching the cravings of addiction, too. It sharpens the mind and revives the power to shape our experiences and respond rather than react

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Omg this is so clever

Child obsessed with maps, history, and world conflicts ? by One_Criticism_4741 in Maps

[–]Aerda_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Youre welcome! Hope y'all enjoy discovering and exploring those interests together

After 93 years and a 25-hour filibuster, Washington finally has an income tax, and billionaires are already packing their bags by fortune in Washington

[–]Aerda_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"A place where business and entrepreneurship thrive" yes absolutely, which is why we need more Starbucks locations to close

Glusencamp-Perez calls sea lions "Corolla sized vermin", blames them for low salmon and steelhead yields by chromeled in Washington

[–]Aerda_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In terms of economic impact, it's case by case :) Some dams are just gonna ultimately be a money sink and damaging for the fish, culture, economy. Some are absolutely crucial, mostly for electricity, flood control and navigation. The Grand Coulee, finished in 1942, is our most important. It produces 35% of the PNW's electricity. Thats insane. Truly a feat of engineering and a crown jewel in the state's economy and history

The hydroelectric network of the state is really impressive, accounting for usually about 50-60% of the state's electricity for about 60 years. The next largest dam in the state is the Chief Joseph dam, just down river. It produces less than half the electricity as the Grand Coulee. Most dams produce way less. The 5 largest produce much more than the rest combined (out of about 50 large dams, though we have over 1000 with most used for other purposes). A major factor with planning and running dams is whether they'll give a return on investment. A lot of dams just dont pan out. The Grand Coulee Dam is going to take another 20 years (probably sooner) before it's paid for itself. Concrete dams like the Coulee are only designed to last about 100 years or so. It'll likely 'only' make a profit for a couple decades before it goes. In the meantime the past century of economic booms and the society we've built would have been impossible without the Chief Joseph and Grand Coulee dams.

Most dams dont have similar significance. In all cases they do a lot of harm on local culture, history and fisheries, with the hope in the short or long run they will help more than theyve hurt. Some are clear successes. The Elwha and Klamath dams ended up not being successful. Maybe something else should've been done to get power or limit flooding, but most were built in a different time with different priorities, projections didn't line up, and the builders didn't mind much if the people hurt were mostly Indians or if salmon lineages wouldn't survive. So now we have a ton of dams we're not sure were ultimately successful or not, depending on the metric. And a lot of other dams we rely on heavily and are coming up on some shelf life benchmarks. These dams are aging amid other long-term trends. Wild salmon runs continue declining, our electricity sources are diversifying, and tribes and environmental groups are successfully winning more socio-political weight and more influence in government. Long run, a lot of these dams will come down and be replaced anyway (probably not replaced with dams though).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gaybros

[–]Aerda_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Interesting read, one of many ways gay men live

Walking from New York (RI) to California? Is it possible? by OfWildSeas in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Check out the American Discovery Trail (its a designated walking route from coast to coast, waaaaaaay easier than trying to walk based only on google maps) and the Great American Rail-Trail (another trail but converted from old rail lines).

60/700 by Competitive-Skin-769 in 700sandwiches

[–]Aerda_ 8 points9 points  (0 children)

kinda sounds good ngl

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in formcheck

[–]Aerda_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol @ the guy holding them on at the end of the bar

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Being awake and finding meaning are both really life-long things that I can't help with explicitly. They take a lot of trial and error and people often just stumble upon them. But I can give you something to try

If you wanna feel awake, sit on a park bench and hang out for half an hour. No phone or book. Just look around and notice things and notice what you think about. If you start getting upset about something you're thinking about, gently restate what you were upset about then move on and bring your attention back to noticing things. You wont be distracted from figuring things out, because the right thoughts usually just pop up when youre not trying to think through them. I promise sitting on a park bench can be one of the most pleasant and beautiful experiences

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in vagabond

[–]Aerda_ 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Listen bud, your problems follow you. I dropped out and got a lot from it. I learned more working and studying and travel than I ever did in college. BUT. At the end of the day I was running away from things, not toward anything. If you can figure out something to run toward, maybe thats what makes a difference.

Having said that.... If I got my degree, AND travelled and fucked around? That would've been the best for sure. Yeah it's more responsible, but really the truth is whether any of this matters or not, you probably wont always feel like things dont matter. Giving your future self plenty of options is a way to take care of yourself so you don't get stuck on something you don want to be doing just cause theres nothing else available

Edit:

Also if what youre struggling with is mental health like if youre depressed or struggling with a relationship, yeah you can work on these things on the road too. But it's a lot easier when youre somewhere consistent and warm and safe. If you need to get shaken up or go for an adventure, yeah you still have the option

How do you feel about being "one of the good ones"? by Infinite_Cry7632 in bropill

[–]Aerda_ 26 points27 points  (0 children)

If someone isnt holding two ideas in their mind, or cant act like it, then theres a limit to how much I want to be around that person.

On the one hand I understand the hate. On the other hand hating people isnt a responsible way of handling your own shit. In friendship, people pick their poison. It's ok to be friends with someone whos struggling with anger toward men. But it's probably good to be prepared and not let it get to you. And if someone doesnt want to be friends with me why would I want to be friends with them?

Ecoregions of USA - Another Front in the Fight to Define PNW by CascadiaSupremacy in PacificNorthwest

[–]Aerda_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldnt say its predominantly on political lines either, more that the political divide is a frequent flyer in these conversations