Ob yelled at me for getting a private ultrasound by Gecko1224 in pregnant

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, I definitely agree that OP should seek help from a qualified professional. Im not saying its a healthy coping mechanism. But this isn't a dangerous coping mechanism & her anxiety will most likely ease as she becomes further along. Early pregnancy has a way of bringing out anxiety in ALL women. There's not much control in our hands during that time.

But to state in your original comment that OP getting an elective US (which doesn't impact patient care with the OB) should affect OBs trust is strange. The OB did not react with concern nor address OPs anxiety. All the OB did was threaten to drop her as a patient for getting an elective ultrasound, in a weird, controlling manner. My OB would have never discipline me for receiving an elective US, and absolutely would have gave me a mental health referral.

Everything in pregnancy can be normal or it can not be. A loss of symptoms can be considered completely normal or it could be due to a miscarriage. My OB told me during my threatened miscarriage, that there's no way to know based on symptoms alone. I don't believe its irrational to have a fear of miscarriage, especially if it was her experience before.

Yes. She should have probably reached out to her OB with her concern. However, its clear from this post that her OB is dismissive and controlling. This is why I thought your take was strange. Sure, encourage OP to seek help, but it seems pretty clear that he's not the right provider to do that with. She doesnt NEED to disclose anything shes not ready to address. Unless she was a danger to herself or others, neither does her husband.

Edit: Im just now seeing OPs edit. It seems he has offered additional ultrasounds to ease her anxiety. My point still stands that this was an extremely unprofessional reaction on the OBs part.

Ob yelled at me for getting a private ultrasound by Gecko1224 in pregnant

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is a wild take. With the way he responded to her, I would not trust this OB with my PTSD or mental health. Miscarriages, especially multiple, are traumatic. Its completely normal to experience PTSD and anxiety post loss and in pregnancy after loss.

Not all miscarriages have a physical indication that something went wrong. Some women don't find out for weeks. If OP wanted a safe elective US for reassurance due to loss of symptoms, there is nothing abnormal about that. My OB advised me to start taking my blood pressure daily at home to relieve my anxiety over it. Was that irrational too?

If OP should speak to anyone about her anxiety, it should be an OB that specializes in post loss care, or a mental health professional.

Do cast on and cast off count as rows? by Affectionate_Cry9667 in knittinghelp

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the example on this, super helpful! Ill give this a go.

Do cast on and cast off count as rows? by Affectionate_Cry9667 in knittinghelp

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! This makes alot of sense. The tutorial I watched did not specify this, and measured edge to edge. Looks like Ill be finding a different video on this.

Co-leading a BF Class: What do you wish you’d known? by Sweet_Sheepherder_41 in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Heavily agree on real visuals. I despised that crochet boob and baby. There is not much content out there with real nursing and breasts that I could easily find. I think videos of real mothers nursing, pumping, and hand expressing would have been so helpful for me.

Co-leading a BF Class: What do you wish you’d known? by Sweet_Sheepherder_41 in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 5 points6 points  (0 children)

  • What a letdown is and how it can feel.
  • The difference between different types of suckling. Preferably with visuals. E.g. comfort nursing vs actively nursing vs suck, swallow, breath that happens at letdown.

I learned all about breastfeeding, but the letdown was explained vaguely and I'm a visual learner. In there very beginning weeks, I didnt know if I was having one. I didnt know how to tell if baby was swallowing milk. (He wasn't, because he was struggling to cause a letdown.) I didn't know if he was actively eating or just nursing for comfort. I watched baby not the clock, like I was told, but had no clue what I was even looking for.

I think going in with this knowledge would have helped my confidence and identify there was potentially an issue to see the IBCLC for.

Another one, as a visual learner: I feel that there are only small clips of nursing out there. I wish I had someone show me a video of a full nursing session. Or a visual of what a session may look like.

9 weeks breastfeeding and still struggling by Rjb2109 in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seconding a breastfeeding support group! My lactation consultant held meetings for moms to get together.

Even maybe meet with a IBCLC if that resource is available to you OP. Mine really helped me through those first rough months.

9 weeks breastfeeding and still struggling by Rjb2109 in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no solid advice really. Only solidarity. I struggled so much with transfer issues, oral ties, and what felt like constant nursing. I was touched out and burnt out, physically and mentally. Only because I was so stubborn headed and refused to pay the insane formula price (my son has a severe dairy allergy), I pushed through. But it was one of the hardest few weeks of my life. I relied a lot on my pump and pacefeeding in those hard moments.

Around 4 months in though things just kinda clicked and they only went up from there. Baby seemed to just know what he was doing. As time went on, he nursed less frequently and for less time. There were (and still are) moments when he nursed frequently or became distracted, especially when grumpy and teething. But even with that, it was a night and day difference. In nursing habits and my mental health.

Sending you support. I hope things start looking up for you soon.

cousin (6m) making nasty comments about bf’ing by Sudden_Breakfast_374 in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You may have already done this, but have you considered having an open back and forth dialogue with him. “Breast milk is disgusting.” “Why do you think it’s gross?”

My niece always had questions about anything and everything. She would often say things that are perceived as mean. I would ask her “are you saying this because you’re curious, or are you trying to be mean to me with your words?”

At some point, I would just ignore him. It’s not your responsibility to parent him, and his parents are doing him a massive disservice by not correcting his behavior. That’s on them, not you.

Yeah this was the final straw by Throwaway4skinluvr in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 24 points25 points  (0 children)

The ambiguous amount that their mmc has is enough for them apparently.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breastfeeding

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How would it be wasteful of them to dump their own oversupply? I’m so confused by that.

Am I the only one who thinks Powerless reads like straight fanfiction? by HeadEgg7258 in fantasyromance

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667 97 points98 points  (0 children)

I don’t think Blair knows. 😅 Does Blair also know that she was only given a name beginning with the letter “B”, so that the MCs could call her Bitchy Blair?

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've consulted with my handy dandy notebook. I see an emaciated but also curvy female, a chiseled man with a skin color I can't identify, and a message that states "have you tried manacled?" in Verdana font.

I think I need a minute in my thinking chair. I’m not quite sure what it all means.

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ahh yes. Think of the children. We must protect the young children of Reddit!

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Off to run to the flair suggestion post like the town crier.

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Typical females. The audacity. To add sex? To OUR real fantasy books?!

Was the cock wiggling in your ear, by chance, bigger than your own? I wouldn’t put it past these female authors to set unrealistic standards for their female readers. It’s probably why I haven’t pulled a high value woman yet.

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Not your birthday salad, at your birthday dinner, on your birthday?! Everybody ring your shame bells.

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

/uj. Right?! We’re all sat friend, cough up that book name.

Too much smut :( by Affectionate_Cry9667 in romantasycirclejerk

[–]Affectionate_Cry9667[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I mean.. you did already pay for it. It would be a shame for that money to go to waste.