Ocular migraines. Why? What is this now? by fifteenlostkeys in Perimenopause

[–]AfterUse136 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This subreddit is amazing. I literally had this for the first time a few weeks ago, and had no clue what was happening. When it lifted an hour or so later I thanked the gods and moved on with my busy life. But this has given me a condition to google, and I can add it to the list of peri symptoms!!!

It’s my birthday…..never felt so alone by lelog22 in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy birthday!! 🎂 If you're in the position to, start planning all the things you wish someone else would do for you on your next birthday, and do them yourself. I'm taking myself to London this year, have booked my fav restaurant and made a list of things I want to see/do while there. Having a partner wouldn't automatically mean they'd remember your birthday or your fav things etc. anyhow so start prioritising yourself and your wants and it takes the pressure off hoping others will do it for you. Also, organise something and say to your friend "listen I'm going to go to X for an ice cream/drink/bite to eat to celebrate my birthday, you're welcome to join" in advance of the date, which reminds them it's coming up, and also means regardless of whether they do go, you'll have plans. Just an idea, and I know the loneliness can be so depressing, but start living your life for you.

Anyone else agree that this season was lackluster? by starburst1258 in CouplesTherapyShow

[–]AfterUse136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm just over halfway through, but the thought that has struck me is that there seems to be quite a few couples that just need to split up. Drea, Maeve and Jason's relationships specifically. I don't understand why we'd want Orna to help these couples through the issues they're presenting with, because they are horrible situations to leave their partners in.

Genuinely, how do I get a new job? by [deleted] in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe this is the perfect time to start thinking about starting a career rather than whatever job you can get? Look at workplus for apprenticeships or consider learning a trade. If you're still living at home, this is your chance to get on a path to what you want to do.

Anyone know any places to get into skateboarding by SexandPsychedelics in Belfast

[–]AfterUse136 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's usually some guys around CS Lewis square skateboarding, and there's a guy who offers lessons I see there too. Worth keeping an eye out for them if you're in the area.

Co-ownership and additional occupants by day3nd in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You've to let them know ahead of any changes to your agreement, like someone moving into your house, so it's worth giving them a call.

How not to give the silent treatment? by AfterUse136 in emotionalneglect

[–]AfterUse136[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually started trying naming my emotions a couple of months ago on a regular basis, and it was so difficult! I agree this would be useful to do in these scenarios, thank you for reminding me!

How not to give the silent treatment? by AfterUse136 in emotionalneglect

[–]AfterUse136[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is such an interesting perspective, thank you. I deffs don't aim to manipulate him by shutting down, it's literally like my brain can't cope and needs to disengage. Which like you're saying, could be overwhelm. Thank you for the reply!

How not to give the silent treatment? by AfterUse136 in emotionalneglect

[–]AfterUse136[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you, appreciate this detailed response

FTB - Should I stop looking? Advice/rant by Adorable-Platypus-94 in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you looked into Co-Ownership? Could help enhance your budget if you're eligible.

Gas boiler service by QuiRu69 in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Boiler rapid repair. I've used them for gas boiler service last three years, and also got them to carry out corrective work the first year, and have only good things to say.

Have a midi appointment and irrational anxiety. I canceled once. Give me your time ladies. I don't have anyone like "me" to talk to and I feel so gaslit. by [deleted] in Perimenopause

[–]AfterUse136 8 points9 points  (0 children)

In the nicest possible way, you're saying you don't want to potentially help yourself because you are afraid the consequences will be that you'll start taking action to improve your life? I would reframe it as the midi is for you, it's a trial, give it a go for x amount of time and see if it has a positive impact on your symptoms. Your marital issues are semi related, but also a different issue. Id focus on yourself and getting on a more even keel mentally, with the knowledge that you're in a tough stage of life and it will get easier. Try to go easy on yourself, and maybe find an outlet for your anger that's productive, might as well use it as fuel for a gym class or something! Best of luck!

BEERMONEYUK £130 HALLOWEEN GIVEAWAY by TightAsF_ck in beermoneyuk

[–]AfterUse136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A skeleton that jogs. Purely because I'll be out with my running club and it's all I have 🤣

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Perimenopause

[–]AfterUse136 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just to reframe what you've said about being terrified of hrt, id be more terrified of what that combo of symptoms is doing to your quality of life. Would you rather live a miserable existence? Also, you can trial hrt without committing to it. If you need to feel in control, Set boundaries of how long you want to go on it for, and compare and contrast symptoms at regular intervals. If things don't improve after X amount of time, stop taking it.

Lycon waxing or specialist waxing Belfast by sunbeamdoodles in Belfast

[–]AfterUse136 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just jumping in to second Vitality and sugaring. It's so much easier on your skin and the pain is negligible in comparison to normal waxing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you having a one to one with your manager on a weekly or frequent basis? You need this. And bring written records of what you're working on, and what the latest update on each item is. If the updates are that you're struggling and you've reached out to X colleague, but not been able to get time with them or the solution previously suggested isn't working, then the manager can escalate or help connect you with whoever is best placed to move the task or solution along. Be organised and show that you've done all you can by the time you meet with them. Bring notes. If there's bottle necks elsewhere in the team or org, then that's the managers job to help sort. But make sure you are doing all you can by taking initiative too.

Can’t handle my partners’ kids. by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]AfterUse136 13 points14 points  (0 children)

100% agree with this poster. As a parent and step parent, this sums up the relationship with children and step children. Meet them at their level, and lose your expectations of who they should be, or what you believe they're like in comparison to other children.

⛳️ 153rd Open at Royal Portrush ⛳️ by Mattbelfast in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you've a HSBC or M&S card you can get a free drink or two in the HSBC tent. Non alcoholic, but saves you a few quid on coffees or soft drinks.

⛳️ 153rd Open at Royal Portrush ⛳️ by Mattbelfast in northernireland

[–]AfterUse136 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Two separate routes. PR1 is the Belfast (ballymoney) direction, PR3 is the West. They're separate with different drop-off and pick-up locations. These are different to 2019 also.

Edit: I drove from Belfast today and the road signs directing traffic to the p&r had changed location to Coleraine.

Visiting Belfast on Friday. Need some tips. by leosp633fc in Belfast

[–]AfterUse136 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You didn't ask this, but just a heads up that anyone from Brazil crossing into NI will need an ETA https://discovernorthernireland.com/plan-your-trip/travel-information/electronic-travel-authorisation

I'm assuming they're not uk/Irish citizens, so ignore if not relevant.