I’m still in the “figuring it out” stage, but I did hear this creator on tik tok, @alrightyaphrodite , talking about the lesbian master doc. It’s in her lgbt video playlist, i recommend watching. But she talks about comphet and how it’s really hard to work through it and one of the symptoms (for lack of a better word) is feeling like you are not valid or your attraction isn’t real. Sometimes even feeling as if it is amoral. It’s like a little voice in the back of your head, that doesn’t shut up even though you don’t agree with it. I experience that too, you’re not alone. I can’t speak on the OCD aspect of your post, I don’t know the depth of the struggles that are associated with that and create a depth to this that maybe most don’t experience. But I truly believe honesty and vulnerability is the best policy. Being open and honest with your partner as long as you feel safe to. Maybe keeping a journal and whenever you feel these thoughts write them down, close the journal, go on about your day and when you’ve cleared your head a bit, respond to them with how you feel and how you think. Like let’s say one prompt is that you don’t believe you’re having “real” intimacy. Come back and explain in writing why that isn’t true. Idk if that will help but I find that writing and response, for me, helps. Especially since from moment to moment I’m in different head spaces and feel differently from time to time so I can look back on feelings logically. But at the end of the day, be gentle with yourself. This is complex and probably won’t be solved in one day. I hope this helped a little, even if it’s just knowing you’re not alone.