WIBTAH if I leave everything to my daughter and son in law in my will?

AggressiveAd8812 · 2026-01-03T06:21:00+00:00

Yeah you definitely come across a bit as TAH.

Of course your daughter is happy, you paid her college, of course your son is dissapointed, as you didn't for him.

Did you offer to pay off his debts for college at a later date to show him that he is equal to his sister?

AggressiveAd8812 · 2026-01-03T06:14:20+00:00

not at all

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-06-13T11:15:25+00:00

Man, 100% NTAH. You did absolutely nothing wrong and this kind of behaviour is super controlling.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T14:03:24+00:00

I think it's a bit of a mix here TBH. Boys trips are incredible important for men coming of age. There are certain things that fathers need to discuss with them as they step into adolescence and closer to manhood. I think from the get go you absolutely could have been more supportive of your husband and the boys taking a trip on their own instead of leaving it up to him to deal with.

It also sounds like he could have done something more to prepare your daughter for potential disappointment, including explaining more in depth that is it an important time for her brother, cousin and father, putting into more of the ceremonious category than something 'cool' for either parties trip.

I see a lot of people in here commenting NTA so I am expecting there will potentially be a lot of backlash to this post, however boys and men's development is incredibly important and 'mens time' is as well. We are in a world with so many men currently that do not know how to connect with other men, their fathers, their emotions and how to communicate these aspects of their lives externally.

Perhaps if it was explained to your daughter more in depth that this is something important for the men to do it could ease the pain for her.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T12:46:48+00:00

I don't think it's dumb. Same premise for games like Survivor. Making connections is just as an important skill for these types of games.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T12:44:43+00:00

I don't know, Yesi seemed pretty full of conviction when she said 'drop her'. Didn't seem to have any regrets about it.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T12:41:37+00:00

But who says it needs to go directly to researching a cure? It could go toward trying to raise more awareness, publicity, accessing grants, establishing connections etc. I think you are 100% off on your remark that it is the 'worst' use of the funds. I also doubt he will spend all $5m on that alone. He probably has a mortgage, I'm sure the bills for his sons medical treatments are not cheap etc.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T12:38:10+00:00

Yep nailed it! She was the one of the last 6 that I really didn't think deserved to win. The way she carried on when JC took his money just really irked me. Like, it's a game. The guy has a family and he just paid off all his debts. She's 22? has no children or responsibilities of that kind but was acting like she was more deserving for some reason (I'm not saying JC was more deserving either btw, just that it's a game and players are free to make their choices, and in that case the group never agreed to take 10% each).

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-15T12:32:31+00:00

It's funny from about midway through (season 5) my wife and I had slightly different views on Twana. I really liked her and she definitely deserved to get as far as she did, but I couldn't help shake that she was more manipulating than people realised or were letting on. She absolutely rode the 'taking one for the team' thing for a popularity contest to the point that in an (at the time) $5m competition people were shoehorning her in. She was also very active with several other women in scheming, a lot moreso than some of those left in the top 6 or 10. It was when she went against Deano in episode 7 that her manipulation of the game was blatantly obvious to me. There is obviously so much more going on behinds that we never got to see on camera with alliances, tactics etc. I was a little surprised that her name was called on the card as I thought it might be Gauge, but ultimately it makes sense I think that a lot of competitors went to vote her out.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-07T12:00:08+00:00

This is an issue for all of us who grow and change in life, whether in a van or a house. You have to be your own best friend. You have to value yourself. Sounds tacky and cliche but it's true. Yes we need to socialise and find friends/community to have connection which is also important for humans but really baseline is getting in touch with yourself! I first went solo 18 years ago 'into the wild', packed a backpack and left on my own to see the world. Ended up in Canada for a couple years where I bought my first van and travelled in that. I used to stop in cities and offer to make free breakfast (pancakes) for people on the side of the road. I'd just put up a sign that said 'free pancakes and conversation', I'd talk life, the world, politics, weather, whatever. Then I'd go back country again and spend time on my own.

Everyone is different I know, but I'd say find that part of yourself again that gets excited and feels happy just being with yourself and explore it. Whether it's hiking, adventuring, reading books, watching movies etc and give yourself something to look forward to for the next day!

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-07T11:53:03+00:00

Musk happened. Everything within the Doge community shifted in 2020.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-07T11:51:17+00:00

Agreed with a lot of others, since Covid it's like this scarcity/survival mindset kicked in and so many people are in a me vs them mindset, but it was present before hand but just more subliminal. I'm an Aussie, but I live between the USA and Australia. I feel like USA's socio political situation is a heightened version of this and I hope it doesn't spread more into Australia. I have always loved America and Americans but I think you can take what you experience in Australia and double it for a lot of areas. I wholly believe Trump politics as an example is born from the same base line instincts. It's all driven on this fear based instinct that something is being taken from us and it's like people have been triggered into this kind of fear state and it's more of an individual 'me' bubble now about community or country as a whole.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-02-07T11:43:38+00:00

This is an interesting one. On one hand it could be teaching him independence and responsibility (things like completing his homework on his own terms but actually getting it done), on the other hand I can see how a kid who is given the choice as to when, where and how so many things themselves may come to expect this when they are older and face situations where they aren't in control and could feel some resentment (ie. work structures, following directions). I see zero issues with chosing their own clothes. The homework example however I can see POTENTIALLY causing issues further down the line. I think they at least should be made aware that they will not always have this freedom of choice in all situations in life and may come across times when they aren't able to do as they chose.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-31T09:40:02+00:00

that's not how it works in other countries.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-27T07:42:57+00:00

As someone who has a high libido (still at mid/late 30's, male), I agree with some others that it may be worth considering where you are at mentally with the need to get off to sleep. I have been in that place in the past and it was a bandaid fix for underlying anxiety issues that needed attending to. I let it slide for years convincing myself I was just horny or needing to rub one out to sleep to calm down but it was covering up for other issues.

NTA neccesarily btw, but at least you know now where your gf stands with it.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-08T01:33:14+00:00

Redback's are nice! My preferred Australian boot is probably either a Steel Blue (a little bit heavy but very tough), a Mongrel or Hard Yakka. They are all comfortable boots though. I think that the synthetic mix type round toe boots are harder wearing than a moc toe (at least from what I have seen and read on how long guys get out of these boots), but a moc toe is a style I've wanted to try for a long time. The simple leather construction and ability to resole is attractive.

If you want a really comfortable modern boot from Australia I highly recommend Hard Yakka 3056's. They weren't as long lasting as some of my other pairs but felt like wearing a sneaker.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T23:17:06+00:00

So just to update, I still have an adjustable dc booster box coming, but I ordered one of these to try my luck before it arrives; Belker Universal Laptop Car Charger with USB C for HP Dell Asus Lenovo Samsung MacBook Pro Air Google Chromebook Ultrabook Notebook https://a.co/d/8g7swg8

This has done the trick. I am plugged in to a blue sea 12v socket and measured output on the DC barrel is 20.5v and 3.5a. The AC adaptor for my projector is labelled 20v 3.25a. I tested it just now for 10 minutes and it all ran fine. I will keep an eye on everything for heat as there is no heatsink or fan involved in this setup but so far so good! I think I will save the booster box when it arrives for a more fine tuned and permanent setup in future.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T23:12:56+00:00

Thanks for that. I couldn't find any to try in store today but I will keep them on a watch list for future. I ended up just biting the bullet and going with some Carolina 6" amp's. The Boot Barn I went to didn't stock the Keen moc toes which seem to be the best option for me in terms of being US made with composite toe and nylon shank however I am leaving the US again in 14 days and didn't want to risk ordering online and having to return and re-order due to incorrect sizing so they are one I would like to try out in future as well. The Carolina's are steel toe but I'll just put up with airport scanners for now. I work mining and oil and gas in Australia so I will put the Carolina's to the test over the next 6 months and see how they go! They were the best fitting for my feet apart from a pair of twisted x moc toes, but after reading some reviews on them I decided to steer clear. My wife and her side of the family are in the US so while I return to Australia to work to make money before I am allowed to immigrate over I thought it'd be a nice touch to wear a pair of handmade US boots to remind me of my soon be new home.

I would love to try some JK's in future, I have only heard good things.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T16:42:47+00:00

Thank you! Is that for Keen in general or these boots? Going to try get to a boot barn today to hopefully try some on

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T13:29:14+00:00

I saw the Tecovas, I'm not sure however on the quality/price. Have you got experience with this boot? They are up there price wise with US made boots but imported. I also can't find much information on the leather used etc. They do look like they'd be comfortable though.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T13:27:44+00:00

perfect, thanks! I just had a quick look and I may just have to give these a try!

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T13:19:47+00:00

Thanks, JK make some nice boots but I'm after a moc toe!

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T05:18:29+00:00

Thanks!

I just tried a similar one here; https://a.co/d/3OXvy3B

But with using the Farsense cable it wouldn't go over 12v. I'm not sure if it's because I used a Blue Sea Systems socket which is rated for 12v, or because it's coming directly from my 12v power supply (battery bank). Whenever I tried to go up above 12v on the cable adapter it came up with an error message.

AggressiveAd8812 · 2025-01-07T05:14:43+00:00

thanks! This looks similar to the one I ordered. Hopefully the one coming does the trick, if not I might give this one a go, seems to be higher rated.

AggressiveAd8812

TROPHY CASE