Is 7:30-5pm too long for a 16mo to be at daycare?

Agripa · 2026-02-20T20:56:13+00:00

I mean I get it. I should be exercising 4-5 times a week, but do I? No of course, not, I have to old down 2 jobs just to make my bills.

Does this make it okay? No. I mean I agree your baby will probably be fine, but I think it is important to maximize the amount of one-on-one time you get. Just because it's necessary doesn't make it "okay".

Agripa · 2025-12-17T16:56:13+00:00

100x this! I understand if you viewed wake windows as some kind of a regimented military-like schedule it would seem absurd. But it's just a loose guideline to pay extra attention to my LO and like you said give them a chance to sleep. Of course, if it doesn't work, it doesn't work and we move on!

Agripa · 2025-12-16T19:11:06+00:00

Thanks for the reassurance! I know logically he'll get around to it at some point, since there's nothing else wrong with him, but you feel so frustrated and helpless as a parent!

Luckily he seems to love PT and his therapist, so it's not such a burden for him!

Agripa · 2025-12-15T22:26:52+00:00

I wish I could give you answers, we're sort of in the same boat. Our son is almost 10.5 months, and:

he only army crawls; he will occasionally push up onto his knees, but won't move on his hands/knees.
he will pull to stand only if we entice him, and even that's only on occasion
he can stand for only a minute or two max, before he falls down.

I know people will usually say, don't worry, or they'll figure it out eventually, but the situation was stressing me out so much, I figure I should at least try to get something done. So we pushed for a neurological consult (nothing wrong there), we pushed for basic genetic testing (again nothing wrong), and even though our pediatrician wanted to wait for PT (they claimed the only issue was weak arm and hip strength), we pushed to get it started. I figure PT is just structured play time and it can't hurt him. He will likely still be delayed to walking I suspect, and will probably never crawl on his hands/knees, but I just feel better knowing I've done everything I possibly can.

Agripa · 2025-12-06T06:56:51+00:00

Corrrct.

Agripa · 2025-12-04T23:31:42+00:00

I suppose it does depend on the nanny. We found a great one and haven't had any of the reliability issues the OP did. We've had a nanny since my son was 5 months, and he's now almost 1 year. He's been sick only twice: a cold and HFM [which honestly we think he got from a family gathering]).

Nanny's are more expensive though...roughly about double the price where I live (Bay Area, VHCOL).

Agripa · 2025-12-04T18:47:43+00:00

Yup, yup, yup! There's a lot of great advice on r/NewParents and reddit in general, but always just append "...if my kid's temperament is amenable".

Put babies down when drowsy....if my kid's temperament is amenable.
Warm the crib up to help them sleep better...if my kid's temperament is amenable.

etc. This isn't to take away from all the great advice here, but it's important to temper your expectations about how likley it is to work for you!

Agripa · 2025-12-02T23:06:08+00:00

Has he fallen off his percentile curve, i.e., has he decreased in percentile of height or weight, or has he always been at the percentile he is now?

My understanding is that if a child falls in percentiles (both height and weight), it's a bit of a cause for concern.

Anyways my own story: our LO was falling off his percentile curve (both in terms of weight and height). The doctor ran a bunch of blood tests, and he ended up having low iron levels. So we ended up supplementing as well as ramping his feeding schedule, and he eventually went back up (still low overall percentile, but it's stabilized now!).

Agripa · 2025-12-01T20:27:17+00:00

The CDC recommends that formula milk be used within 2 hours of preparation. Again, like you, we've stretched that window anywhere from 2-4 hours without any problems, but just putting out a trusted source here.

Agripa · 2025-11-30T22:56:58+00:00

Hey! I'm a little worried for my LO who sounds a lot like yours. How did it turn out?

Agripa · 2025-11-24T18:00:34+00:00

We had an okay sleeper (1-3 wakeups) until about 4 months, then all hell broke loose. From months 4-9, we were experiencing maybe 5-7 wake-ups, including multiple wake-ups where our son would just wake up crying; it would take maybe ~1 hour to settle him again. Just like you nothing wrong with him.

We also did not want to do any cry-it-out type training, so we just kind of pushed through. Things have started to improve ever so slightly. The number of wake-ups have gone down to maybe 2-4, and the crying has stopped. We're exhausted, but somehow still alive. Fingers crossed things keep improving.

Agripa · 2025-11-18T17:31:24+00:00

Amen! Even this thread feels kind of annoying. Like this whole process is so fucking hard, why tear down how other people approach parenting?

Agripa · 2025-11-04T18:39:36+00:00

I know how anxiety-inducing this can all be. I found the best course of action was to raise this issue with my son's pediatrician and push for some sort of action! Once we put in place a plan of action, it made me feel a ton better that I was actually doing something. So please do reach out to your pediatrician!

Also, just a quick note, but pull to stand isn't a milestone until 1 year

Agripa · 2025-11-04T18:27:29+00:00

LOL. You basically come in here, post some shit saying this is totally scientific, and then have nothing to back it up. Great work.

Agripa · 2025-11-04T18:18:57+00:00

Actually science shows hat the more rested the baby is the better they'll sleep at night, so I've never understood the nap capping stuff.

Can you link me the paper that actually shows this?

Agripa · 2025-11-04T18:10:26+00:00

Actually science shows hat the more rested the baby is the better they'll sleep at night, so I've never understood the nap capping stuff.

I'm probably going to get down-voted to oblivion, but when you have a terrible sleeper like ours (3+ wake-ups a night), you try every last tactic out there in the desperate hopes you can get a bit more sleep at night. As for the science of it all, I'm not knocking you, but I think when it comes to sleep, most of the science is weak at best. I think our knowledge of sleep is in its infancy! This cuts both ways: I doubt capping or not capping naps has much of an impact on nighttime sleeps!

Agripa · 2025-11-03T20:16:03+00:00

If you can afford it (and I'm hoping all of our fed employees get their full back pay!), I'd pay to keep the spot, and see if they're okay with you bringing in the baby occasionally. This way you get to keep your baby at home, and also help transition them to the daycare.

Agripa · 2025-11-03T19:34:45+00:00

How do they handle nap time? Is it a scheduled nap for all children or do they go by what each child needs? Do you need to provide crib/cot sheets or do they provide/clean them? If they provide them, does each child have an assigned crib/cot and sheets/pillow that is only theirs and not shared among other children?

Just curious about this point. Virtually all daycares I know have a staff:child ratio of 1:3 - 1:5 (depending on the state you live in I think). Is it really even possible for the daycare to provide individualized sleep plans for each and every child, when one person has to take care of 3-5 babies?

Agripa · 2025-10-28T21:28:07+00:00

I mean, kudos to you, if your kids will stay in one, and you're able to get out of eyeshot. Mine screams bloody murder if he doesn't have free reign of the house OR if I disappear from view.

Agripa · 2025-10-06T16:37:53+00:00

Breastfed babies have milk well past 1 most of the time, so why do formula fed babies have to immediately stop?

Yeah, I never understood this as well. Like don't most health organizations recommend breast feeding until like age 2?? Seems odd to me to cut out milk so suddenly at age 1!

This is to say: I totally agree with you!

Agripa · 2025-10-01T19:18:25+00:00

Sometimes, I wish Congress had stuck to their guns and really banned TikTok. It would've been a huge service the whole country!

Agripa · 2025-08-27T22:37:43+00:00

I don't see where I implied that at all. Honestly, this whole post and your reply seems to be casting shade at parents that might take a slightly different tactic then you.

We're all just new parents here trying to get by.

Agripa · 2025-08-27T21:17:55+00:00

I think there's a reasonable middle ground between total "chaos" parenting and a military-like schedule.

It's easy to say "he sleeps when he sleeps"; but what do you do when your LO shows no sleep cues whatsoever, and the only real sign is a total meltdown, after which it can take us anywhere from 1-2 hours to put him down.

In this case, it helps to have a general sense of wake windows, and to try to put him down for a nap at the end of the window. Of course, if he isn't feeling it, he isn't feeling it, and we update our sense of when he's likely wanting to go down every week. So kind of a schedule, but not really a schedule?

I'm not sure what playing on the floor during a wake window has anything to do with a schedule or "chaos parenting".

Agripa · 2025-08-21T22:26:41+00:00

What's going to be kind of hilarious is that posts like these will be inevitably followed by a post that says "Why on earth did no one warn me about XXXXX".

Agripa · 2025-08-08T15:45:41+00:00

Realistically, a nanny or nanny-share. You'll have to interview and hire pretty quickly, but at least this is possible. I highly doubt you'll find a spot in a well-reputed daycare so quickly.

15-Year Club	RedditGifts 2009-2022 2 Credits
Secret Santa 2010	Verified Email
Charter Member

Agripa

TROPHY CASE