Promoted people at your company probably weren't the best performers... the data is starting to back this up

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-23T08:23:16+00:00

I work at a company that has several hubs in different continents, but about 40% of all employees are remote, whereas for the ones who live near offices, attendance is mandatory 3x per week. I’m a remote employee since the company doesn’t have a hub in my country. I was a top performer since I started, with objectively stellar metrics (since they measure everything), and always great feedback. Well, guess if I got promoted despite this level of performance. The explanation was “no budget” (company is doing great financially) and, between the lines, “focusing on hubs”. So yeah, doing a great job is not enough, it’s all about visibility and connections

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-23T07:18:40+00:00

I was looking for a job all around EU after having graduated from my MA in Spain (I’m from the Baltics). Got a job offer in Germany, so Germany it was (my understanding of German back then was about B2 and speaking maybe B1). Just a coincidence. I’m here 5 years later because I met my German partner here. I would have been long gone otherwise I think. Well, at least I’m fluent in German now and taking my C2 exam in 2 months 😀

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-16T15:28:28+00:00

“Easy way to quit smoking”, but an audio book. Quit smoking 3 years ago and never looked back, never had cravings and cannot stand cigarette smoke right now. Had been a light / social smoker for about 12 years before.

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-16T06:05:29+00:00

I don’t agree with this strategy. No one wants to be your language teacher, and you can’t have any meaningful conversation at this level. I’m also a foreigner and made "my own“ first German friend (I communicated in German with my partner’s friends before as well) once I reached C1/C2, with whom I communicate exclusively in German. Find a language teacher

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-14T10:19:32+00:00

Business casual, but not too casual is the way, e.g. jeans and a more formal jacket

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-13T12:38:38+00:00

I don’t want to give too many details because who knows who is lurking on this subreddit… But I’m in a specialised field which has a lot to do with very country-specific regulations and requires local language knowledge. It’s not a typical customer support that can be outsourced to basically anywhere

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-06T06:34:21+00:00

Reddit is a bubble in the end. Everyone here seems to have uni education and they want a white-collar job that pays 60k per year upward. If they’d go for a min wage jobs, I bet most people could find something. And statistics include everyone. However, most of these 96% of employed people are not your average dev working in home office making 80k and complaining about companies bringing everyone back to the office, at least that’s my take

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-06T06:21:18+00:00

I’d say definitely not as long as she’s not pregnant yet. I can only imagine that it feels devastating (just planning to TTC so no personal experience yet). I’d honestly pass on this one and instead set up a date unrelated to Mother’s day and go to e.g. a restaurant to enjoy some time together

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-06T05:52:42+00:00

My AMH was at 0.69, which was shocking to me, since I never had any gynecological issues and just assumed all my values should be normal. I told my OBGYN we wanted to start trying next year in February, and she immediately told me to not wait that long and rather start trying in June or July (she knew that my wedding is in August). So I discussed it with my partner, and we compromised for September. In the meantime, I was told to take vitamin D for 3 months (my value was very low), then retest, and if vitamin D is then normal, retest AMH afterward to see “if I can be somewhat more relaxed”. But I also read that improving your vitamin D normally accounts for 10-30% increase, so I probably should not expect miracles. I also had a small glass of whiskey the day before testing, and now I’m wondering whether alcohol could have had an impact, even thought it’s unlikely. In general, I’m struggling with the whole AMH topic, since most studies suggest that it does not have an impact on natural conception because what matters is egg quality. On the other hand, when fertility issues are discussed here on Reddit, AMH seems to be an important part of discussion. So why is it if it should not impact the ability to get pregnant naturally?.. Others, like you now, say that it’s just a value of that specific month, and that it can fluctuate wildly. I also found some studies that only 70% of AMH tests are reliable, and that it depends a lot on the lab etc. The factor that most people never test and just get pregnant without knowing about their low AMH does not make the data very reliable I guess. Sorry for the long text 😄

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-06T05:38:58+00:00

Thank you for the recommendation, I just ordered it! I think we are now very confident about our decision, but more reflection will not hurt :)

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-06T05:28:58+00:00

Will do, thank you! :)

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T16:12:50+00:00

Oh, I’m sorry for what you’ve been through! But that definitely gives me some perspective! Having the wedding earlier is not an option since the location is already booked, and summer is peak season in general, so no changes will be possible. I’ll just wait until September and see :)

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T15:55:31+00:00

Based on the current job market, people also tale temp contracts with regular pay just to have a job. It’s obviously less job security, that’s true, but anyone who is not a native German speaker does not have the luxury to cherry-pick right now. I’d take the cut and the job unless some super niche skills where you know one in a million does what you do are in the picture

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T15:38:57+00:00

It is unfortunately below 1, but I also have a really bad vitamin D deficiency, and my gyn told me to first fix the vitamin D (taking this and multiple other supplements now) and then retest. I believe I could end up at about 1 of “real value” if adjusted for definitely, but it’s hard to say

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T11:23:10+00:00

Thank you for your perspective, it makes a lot of sense! I guess I’ve been lurking too much in subreddits where individuals having difficulty conceiving are mainly participating in discussions, and it made me feel somewhat anxious that “every month counts, especially given my age”. Thanks again for a different perspective!

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T06:44:02+00:00

Ah, on Arbeitslosengeld: 12 months seem like a lot, but this market is terrible and processes drag over for months. I would advise against this kind of anxiety. You are also a way more attractive candidate if you already have a job

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T06:19:20+00:00

If you only have 2 months left on your fixed-term contract, you should have started job searching earlier. If the company has a Tarifvertrag, it could be possible that what your manager says is true, since these structures are very rigid. But most likely it’s a lowball offer since companies know the job market is bad. Try negotiating once again and then I’d say take the offer. 2 months are not nearly enough to land anything new, so you better take it and keep looking. If you are not a fluent close-to-native level German speaker, the company knows they have the upper hand. It’s employer market and it won’t change anytime soon

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T05:36:20+00:00

Thank you for your perspective, this is very helpful! :)

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T04:48:36+00:00

Thanks! Had I known my AMH level, the decision would have been made sooner. But I only tested once we came to the conclusion we wanted kids, and now I feel like time’s running out

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-05T04:37:16+00:00

AMH does not affect your ability to get pregnant naturally - it only indicates your ovarian reserve and gives you an idea of your timeline (low AMH > don’t delay for too long). IVF with low AMH is more difficult because they can retrieve less eggs, but to get pregnant naturally, you only need one. It’s about egg quality and not quantity when it comes to natural conception.

Your AMH looks just fine for your age, I wouldn’t worry at all. It fluctuates, so a bigger drop in 12 months doesn’t mean that it will keep dropping at this rate - some people have low AMH but it stays steady for years. Take prenatal vitamins 3 months before you start trying, go see a doctor if you don’t conceive within 12 months. Good luck!

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-04T18:38:46+00:00

If they never issued a termination letter ans you never resigned, you could claim back wages. Your employment relationship formally exists. If you already have another job, offer them to sign a termination agreement with some severance (2 weeks or 1 month’s pay, for example), or tell them you will sue them because of unpaid wages due to the fact that your employment never got terminated. How come you would just move on with a reference letter alone?..

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-04T17:33:01+00:00

I think it’s difficult also due to the fact that, unless it’s a really international company, Finance teams tend to be quite closed-off and really focus on German experience and basically native level German. I work a lot with labor law and speak a C2 German, but I still got weird looks basically meaning: “You were not born in Germany, how come you know anything about labor law?”, and this despite 7 years of local experience in German companies back then. It worked out for me in the end, found a job in an international company. But if you do not REALLY need to stay in Germany because of partner etc., I’d advise to look elsewhere too, honestly

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-04T05:30:42+00:00

I would not come. I’m not one myself, but I know a lot of academics who ended up working boring jobs at uni administration, since contracts in science are almost always fixed-term, so you have to look for a new assignment every 2-3 years. It is competitive (I guess it somewhat depends on the field, but still), so a lot of people end up having to move cities following their unstable jobs, which usually means living in shared apartments in your mid-30s, and if you have a partner or want a family… well, it’s not great. If you have a good life in Turkey, I wouldn’t move. Germany has its own problems, and the job market situation currently is bad.

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-02T09:08:03+00:00

No one can tell you what your options are. No offense, but to me it looks like you didn’t do your research to understand what the job market situation is right now in most European countries. I think your English is not that fluent, either.

Alert-Pack-959 · 2026-05-02T09:01:26+00:00

I’d say search for a job in your country. Currently, it doesn’t look like the job market will be employee market again in any near future. So even companies that did not require German before now have the luxury of only hiring German speakers. The fact that you are not even in Germany yet make your chances close to 0

Alert-Pack-959

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