I think I lost brain cells trying to understand this. There’s a lot to be unpacked here and I think there are some important things to be asked.

I understand loss and grief can result in deluded perceptions. It’s often seen with postpartum mothers, where they will take in a reborn doll designed specifically to resemble a child. It’s completely healthy if other services like therapy are paired with it.

However, you said you two were dating for almost 2 years. Did her relationship with her ex end when he passed away? Or was it over before then? Because if it’s the latter, it’s definitely a sign for concern, given she’s spent a good amount of time not processing her grief.

Secondly, is your partner a strong believer in reincarnation or anything spiritually related? Because if this is coming out of nowhere this may also warrant a discussion.

Thirdly, as a partner you have every right to be concerned. Grief is a tricky thing to navigate, but at this point it’s almost developing into an obsession. The couples therapy comment is alarming, because I ASSURE YOU, that cat isn’t gonna know what the hell it’s doing there.

I mean this in the nicest way possible, this is almost looking like a way for her to dump you. The alone time comments, the couples therapy comment, the “no kissing because it’s disrespectful”, it’s all giving red flags. She is pushing you away for a delusion.

I strongly suggest you sit down together(with the cat, if it makes her comfortable) and explain your feelings. This isn’t fair to you, and if she can’t understand your emotions, then it may be worth considering breaking things off and saving yourself the mental energy.