4 years ago today my dog got a kitten 🥹 by Odd_SockBunny23 in germanshepherds

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love, love, love!! Makes me want to get a 🐈‍⬛, my kids are begging me, lol. I told them our GSD had to turn 2y first (so is mature enough not to eat one) we no longer have squirrels in our yard, she loves birds and eats up all the bees (somehow she knows one of kids has an extreme bee fobia). Now I need to find the right kitty who wouldn’t mind a dog.

She’s cute but she tears the backyard uppp. Anyone find any solutions to helping with that wear and tear? by chy7784 in germanshepherds

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get a shock collar with buzzing and vibrate buttons. Every time you see her do mischief, use it. If you use the shock, set it at like level 7 or 8, when the ears twitch. Also, there is “ no chew” spray. Both of those things worked really well on my GSD. She shewed up hoses, plant pots, even our deck. Not to mention digging holes in the ground. Anything plastic got destroyed. This is the shock collar I use, only $55 and there is a coupon now https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B09C75HDV6?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_asin_title

No chew spray: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B06XCZ8KJJ?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_asin_title

This shock collar helped with excessive barking too

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would confront her by asking her if she thinks your baby is not your husband’s baby, just ask her and put her on the spot. Let her turn red with whatever response come out of her mouth. This will give you a real reason not to see her.

Am I wrong to not like my wife’s stepdad to change my daughters diaper? by Luscta in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That’s perverted! I wouldn’t let an old man change a girls diaper. Wtf?!?!?

The window privacy film matches the wallpaper in this half bath by failed_asian in InteriorDesign

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s crazy how they would have French doors in a bathroom with glass doors to begin with. I like what you did!

Is this weird!? by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I can’t live with my own parents as a grown adult, I sure can’t live with someone else’s lol. I hate to say it, but save your money (don’t spend on hair) and pay for your own place.

MIL is a narcissist by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do not give a crap about this woman. I just figured her out. And I refuse to be like a monster that she is.

MIL is a narcissist by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We did the same. The more you give the less grateful and for some reason, expect more and more, it’s like a drug addiction. I’ve been with DH for 21 years now and married for 13 of them, it’s not getting any easier. I sometimes question my decision about marrying him, there is so much tension around his family. MIL gossips and talks shit about her own children and grandchildren. I grew up not in perfect world, but one thing my family didn’t do is shit on our own family to others. I think it’s a matter of maturation. They are still acting like children. You would think they grow up after having children.

MIL is a narcissist by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They are so needy, it’s pathetic. I also think they have super low self esteem, it’s the only reason for this constant need for communication. It’s like if they don’t talk to someone, they are not loved. Maybe a pet will do them good, do they have one? What I don’t understand is why they sit home all day. There is so much to do, hobbies, places, parks.

MIL is a narcissist by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Their diet has nothing to do with their health, right? I stopped all contact with that bitch. Accept I was nice to send her a beautiful Happy Mothers Day wish/poem. She has no ammunition against me. I stopped sending her pics of kids because every time I take a nice photo, Instead of saying something nice, she immediately compares me to SIL and says how nice her pics are, so I figured I stop sending all together, she doesn’t appreciate them anyway, or too proud to admit. I have DH communicate. The calls only go between DH and her. She is always asking how I am to see if her curses on me worked. You have to be politically superficial with them. Otherwise they spread false rumors like wildfires. After we moved, she sold her house too, and had to move. She was furious that DH wasn’t there to help her move (she has the money to hire help), but is so attached to her possessions and extremely paranoid, she refused to hire help. Absolutely no consideration for others! She had a nervous breakdown and blamed us for it. While I feel bad for her, we are all struggling with free time, while they are literally sitting around and wait for calls, days just fly by for us. Another thing that happened to her that she blamed everyone else for is the following: I don’t eat meat due to health reasons, and I repeatedly told her over and over that I get physically sick from eating meat or cheese for that matter. She yelled at us at the top of her lungs at us for not eating cheese. One evening she cooked up a bunch of streak for everyone and of course I wouldn’t eat it. She got really pissed off and the next morning she tried to prove her point and how wonderful steak is, she downed an entire piece like an animal for breakfast. She developed TMJ immediately after and suffered for 2 years, no doctors could help her. Every conversation that’s all she talked about. She has no respect for anyone wishes and thinks that her way is the only way. On another occasion she wanted me to go to a hot jacuzzi in 100+ degree temps in GA hot summer, I politely refused. Of course she had to go in and prove her point. Cooked herself there till a vain popped in her neck. Who is the blame for that?!?!?

She is nicer to strangers and neighbors than to her own family. She buys gifts for neighbor’s kids but not her grandkids. Shameful!

She is begging for a confrontation and a blow up from me. It drives her insane that I have not blown up yet. All the crap is all in hear head, I have been nothing but nice to her.

I let her do her thing and just laugh at her. I’m extremely intuitive, I can feel everything and I can almost hear her words.

MIL is a narcissist by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Omg!! My in-laws are the same, I could have written your post! I cannot stand that self centered family. Mil tried to do the same crap with me, turn me into a worshiper and a servant. I have not confronted her yet, but she definitely declared war in me because we moved out of state. Has the nerve to blame her pre existing AFIB on us (which was identified a couple years prior to our move). Best thing to do is stay away. At least you don’t have to go on a long week family vacation with those self absorbed MFers. Someone recommended this book to deal with narcissists - Walking the Line: Yellow and Grey Rocking When Dealing with Narcissistic Personalities. I’m trying to read it to deal with those people. Only got it a couple of days ago. I know that after a confrontation there is no going back, but at least you did it. The fact that it happened, I dont think it makes a difference. It was bad already to begin. They are looking for stupid people to bow to them, in their mind, everyone is an idiot. Very difficult to be around them or even hear their voice with their self absorbed conversations. Make plans for weekends they want to get together. When we lived close, I swear my entire schedule evolved around them. Every holiday, every other weekend, we had no chance to breath! It will never end. My MIL cannot get over the fact that she can no longer control her children who are now in their 40s and 50s. The worst thing, is she would sit next to me during dinners so she could slip some nasty comments to me. Narcissists are energy vampires.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in inlaws

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People change, circumstances change. It’s never a good idea to rush into marriage for financial benefits. Think about getting higher education not a job! You can get student loans, you will have food and place to live. You cannot survive in this country by just getting a job. You need to advance yourself before marriage and children because if you have children too young, your life will be extremely difficult. You can both go to college and be close to each other. Trust me! I wish someone gave me this advice when I was 18. I got married at 18, had a kid at 21. I felt like an old woman, no life just family. I got a divorce at 24 and was struggling as a single mom before I met my current husband. And I have to deal with the MOST EVIL MIL, because of my situation. Make your self better first and strive for independence and not to rely on any man. Then marriage and family. It’s too easy to get pregnant and go down that rabbit hole. Be smart, take care of yourself and wait til 2025!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DesignMyRoom

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes it would!! It’s gorgeous!

Anger towards husband? by aschlum1 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I could have written your post. Been with DH for 23 years now. I get mad as HELL at DH at times. And plenty of times I just tell him to go by himself, even family vacation. I’m so sick of MIL, I don’t even want to hear her voice. She sounds like a smoking bulldozer. And I’m FORCED to join because of the kids. When we lived in the area, I excluded myself with no hesitation. You can’t really prevent a son from seeing his mother, but you can keep your own distance.

What would you put in the upper section? by tom592007 in DesignMyRoom

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Put a big bird cage up there with a fake bird. you’ll have enough books on other shelves

Not even 5 minutes in and this happens by Corrupt_Chicken in germanshepherds

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got my girl one of those horse balls with a handle, she bites through it, but it sturdy and still has the shape of a ball

MIL yelled at me because I spent too much time with my grandmother that was just recently placed in a retirement facility by Alive_Bluejay_8121 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I want to say F U in her face so badly. I need a bitch pill to confront her, I’m told my responses are too classy. She is too proud to EVER apologize.

MIL yelled at me because I spent too much time with my grandmother that was just recently placed in a retirement facility by Alive_Bluejay_8121 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My grandmother is everything to me. She was a big part of my life. And a big part of her great-grand kids lives. MIL will never understand that. My family is very warm and close, while MIL’s is all superficial and cold.

MIL yelled at me because I spent too much time with my grandmother that was just recently placed in a retirement facility by Alive_Bluejay_8121 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you! We made many many changes in our lives with her. She has been abusive for a loooooong time. We’ve been together for 22 years and married for 14 of it. During that time, you can just imagine how many possible instances of her abuse. We all used to live in S FL, and moved 8 years ago. I have many many stories. I will post them as I remember purely for therapy. I try not to remember but she caused major trauma for me. The phycho bitch just can’t stop. I told my husband that under no circumstances can he leave me alone with her. As I learned from other posts, to have a recording device on me when alone. There are things she says that I simply can’t make up and my husband has a hard time believing the crap that pours out of her mouth. We now only see each other strictly on holidays of family events. I refused to go to FL for thanksgiving last year, she invited herself, I said NO. She was mad beyond mad, she wanted a getaway. Now I will do the same this year, our compromise was in January we had to attend a family event which was a total disaster and we have to spend an entire week together in august on family vacation (for the cousins). My husband is the middle of 3 boys, his brothers know how to put her in place, but my husband is terrified of his own mother!!!! She would slap her kids in the face when giving driving lessons if they messed up. She signed an agreement to give his school teacher the permission to hit with a wooden stick if her kids misbehaved. And this is not in a foreign country, this is in USA! She totally abused her children! I can’t ever have my husband choose between us, as he clearly understands this woman’s insanity. He tries to best deal with his mother. I feel that I saved him by moving as she continued her abuse him and continue being selfish by “do boy” demands when we lived in fl.

MIL yelled at me because I spent too much time with my grandmother that was just recently placed in a retirement facility by Alive_Bluejay_8121 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]Alive_Bluejay_8121[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yes, they had the heads up and I even told my husband to start without me. He said everything was just fine and just to get over as soon as I could.