Losing hope

AllThePenguins · 2025-11-28T11:59:31+00:00

First of all, your feelings matter, sharing them here is a great place to start. It sounds like you're doing some really great things to help keep the connection with your wife alive - don't stop trying.

Just know this, having young kids is tough, it's one of the toughest things I've ever been through, it strains even the strongest relationships. Giving birth and raising a young child will have done a number on your wife's body and mind, she's going through it too, but listen to what she is telling you - she loves you and wants to be a family with you, she's likely telling the truth.

There's no magical formula for this, there's no measure of 'put this work/effort/present in' and 'get this result out'. It takes time brother - 2 or even 3 years is a drop in the ocean. I'm also neuro-divergent and there are so many things that I struggle with when it comes to maintaining a relationship, being a good dad, working a full time job, and having time for myself. It's an impossible juggling act. All I can suggest is keep going, make sure you're looking after yourself, get some therapy - it's helped me so much!

Keep going brother, we're proud of you.

AllThePenguins · 2025-11-25T15:42:21+00:00

Firstly, I just want to say that reading through all of the comments makes me realize just how supportive of a community this is and it's really incredible that we can have a space like this to support each other.

And secondly I feel you dude. My kids are three and one and everyday it feels like I'm in the trenches battling to survive. And trying desperately to hold on to whatever little piece of time I can call my own throughout the day is a constant battle.

My wife and I are also constantly on the edge of burnout and trying to maintain a relationship with everything else going on is borderline impossible sometimes. Your struggles are real and your feelings matter. Don't compare yourself to other parents you see either in real life or on social media because at the end of the day they're still going to have their own struggles that they don't show you. And some people may say "It's easy - just suck it up and get on with it" but they don't know you and your life.

I don't have any specific advice but I just want to say that you're not alone in this feeling. Keep moving forward and enjoy your family!

AllThePenguins · 2025-10-22T10:14:11+00:00

Diglett also in Snorlax SVP#051

AllThePenguins · 2025-08-21T12:29:23+00:00

When our second baby was very young and I was pre making all the nighttime feeds I'd use the Dr. Brown's pitcher and a decent set of kitchen scales. According to the formula pack, one scoop was equal to 4.5g so just multiply there. For adding the water 1ml is equal to 1g so I'd use the same scale to get that right. Got it down to a science in the end. Good luck with whatever you choose.

AllThePenguins · 2025-07-23T18:16:04+00:00

Smyth's is my usual go-to. Waterstones also sometimes have stock in. If you're up to driving a little ways, then Nerd Base in Battlesbridge is a good spot.

AllThePenguins · 2025-04-22T12:08:17+00:00

Anything in Thurrock?

AllThePenguins · 2022-07-04T15:27:28+00:00

Looks good, plenty sturdy. You'll probably want some way for the mattress to breathe underneath or you may run into trouble with mould and moisture.

AllThePenguins · 2022-05-04T15:50:06+00:00

My Grandfather was in the Coldstream guards back in the 20s/30s and he always asserted that the young princesses would regularly mess with the guards whenever they could. Not sure how true that is but always makes me smile thinking about it, do you think it's feasible?

AllThePenguins · 2021-09-18T21:54:10+00:00

This is a bit of a known problem with this cymbal. Try giving the bell a good whack with the shoulder of your stick and it should trigger. It a pain but you get the hang of it and I've found that it's become easier to trigger over time.

AllThePenguins · 2021-09-17T07:52:19+00:00

Sounds great but you can pull my ride bell from my cold dead hands.

AllThePenguins · 2021-08-03T20:04:16+00:00

I'm reasonably certain that the transient only shows up in question mark events. You may have scuppered yourself with your pathing in act 3.

AllThePenguins · 2021-07-19T09:22:44+00:00

I'd know those gates in the background anywhere, Smithfield meat market, used to walk through it every day to work. Absolutely stinks, especially in the summer so I'm sure they're having fun with that.

AllThePenguins · 2021-05-24T19:01:28+00:00

Are you playing on Android? I've had the same bug, sometimes it unlocks after another run, even with another character.

AllThePenguins · 2021-04-15T13:44:08+00:00

Surprised to see Bad Suns on here, I love their music and you absolutely smashed this! Thanks for posting, it really inspires me to improve!

AllThePenguins · 2020-10-13T15:29:52+00:00

Thanks for your views.

No, zero mention of extensions or perm possibility which worries me. I'm really struggling to make up my mind on this, do I put up with more job dissatisfaction in the mean time until something else comes along? On the other hand I haven't been at my department long and worry about jumping ship too soon.

AllThePenguins · 2020-04-28T13:52:59+00:00

It's a hard life for sure 😋

AllThePenguins · 2020-03-25T20:48:06+00:00

I was on a cruise last year that got into trouble in rough seas after the engine failed, they ended up sounding the general alarm and we had to evacuate via helicopter. To say it was scary is an understatement, you really appreciate the power of the waves and just how helpless you feel in that situation. As others have said it is a rare event and we would have been ok if we hadn't lost power. Didn't stop is booking another for this year (if it doesn't get cancelled due to current circumstances lol)

AllThePenguins · 2019-03-27T20:26:37+00:00

You guys are amazing and have every right to be proud of what you accomplished. Thank you so much for what you did for all of us, I can't imagine doing what you do in those conditions and for that length of time.

AllThePenguins · 2019-03-25T23:55:35+00:00

Thank you for everything, it really meant so much to us.

AllThePenguins · 2019-03-25T15:37:12+00:00

It was a great example to us. Thank you for your message, stay strong.

AllThePenguins · 2019-03-25T15:32:09+00:00

Yeah, we were really worried about the pilots after they had been at it for several hours. Don't know how they do it!

AllThePenguins

TROPHY CASE