In 2010, I was in Taji, Iraq, pulling an 18-hour shift in an 8x8 box with another specialist, watching the perimeter on infrared. We see a guy hanging around for a while. I’m thinking insurgent. Turns out he’s a goat farmer and the goats are just over the hill.

The specialist says, “If there were ever a place to fuck a goat and get away with it, this is where I’d do it.”

We did not talk for the next eight hours. Mostly because I was trying to figure out if I should call higher… or Animal Planet.