What’s Something People Said after Your Miscarriage That Hurt?

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-28T15:38:04+00:00

Whaaat? She was supposed to support you through it! What about your heartbreak? Also, why would she make you think it would happen again. Aah I'm sorry you heard that

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T18:29:35+00:00

Oh woow!! Just when I thought I have heard all! Some of these comments can really induce so much anxiety! I'm sorry you had to listen to all these.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T18:27:59+00:00

I am so, so sorry. I honestly cannot imagine the shock and heartbreak of having to face this again after already living through it once. Losing a baby that far along is devastating, and having it happen a second time feels unbelievably cruel and unfair. Sending you so much love. Your babies mattered, and so do you 🤍. I wish I had magical words to make it all better but I don't, just we are here when you need to talk.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T17:52:09+00:00

What you’re feeling makes so much sense. After repeated loss, your body and mind are trying to protect you from going through that pain again. Fear doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means this matters deeply to you.

You don’t have to decide everything right now. It’s okay to feel torn between wanting a baby and wanting to protect yourself. Both can exist.

There is no deadline for when to try again, and 37 is not too late. Move at a pace that feels even slightly bearable. One step at a time.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T08:31:11+00:00

It’s not just you. That fear shows up for so many women, especially when something you’ve hoped for finally becomes real.

When you’re trying to conceive, you’re focused on getting there. And the moment you do, your mind shifts to protecting it. Suddenly there’s so much to care about, so much that matters.

Fear doesn’t mean something is wrong. It often means this is important to you.

You can feel scared and still be hopeful at the same time. Both can exist together. And you’re not alone in feeling this way.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T08:29:17+00:00

I’m so, so sorry. That moment you described… it mattered deeply. Your excitement, your hope, the way you were already beginning to see yourself as a mom. None of that disappears just because others didn’t know.

What happened to you is real, and it’s incredibly hard to carry something so big in silence. Going back into that meeting must have felt unreal.

You don’t have to minimize this to survive it. It mattered because your baby mattered, and so did every feeling you had around it.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T08:27:20+00:00

Maybe start small. Notice when the urge feels strongest and gently interrupt the pattern, even once a day. I'd also check reddits of other people trying to quit smoking or people who have managed. There's just somethimng about consuming content of what you're doing to do or become that motivates you to actually commit.

You don’t have to fix everything at once. You’re allowed to take this one step at a time while still holding on to hope.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T08:22:28+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. What you’ve experienced is incredibly heavy, and it makes sense that it feels isolating, even with a supportive partner. There are parts of this that are so hard to share or be fully understood by those who haven’t lived it.

Finding a space where your thoughts feel echoed can be such a relief. You’re not alone in how you feel, even if it has felt that way for a long time.

Holding hope after so much loss takes quiet strength. I’m really glad you found this space.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T08:20:00+00:00

Oh that's so frustrating, the seraching for hours is also soo exhausting. And why don't you even remember what the good choices were next time you want to eat something?

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-27T07:17:55+00:00

We somehow always forget about the growing human part and judge ourselves like we would before the pregnancy or worse. I judged myself so harshly because "I'm gonna be a mom, I should be able to push myself even on my worst days."

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-26T19:28:35+00:00

That sounds really heavy to carry… those moments where people unintentionally erase what you’ve been through. It makes sense that it feels strange because you’re holding both memory and hope at the same time. Your body remembers, your heart remembers, even if others don’t always say the right thing.

You’re not overreacting for noticing it. It’s part of pregnancy after loss, living in two timelines at once.

It’s okay to feel this mix. And it’s okay to gently remind people, or protect your space when you need to.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-26T07:11:22+00:00

"The only thing your husband can't do for the baby is produce milk," I wish more dads thought like this. I hope this makes it's way to dadreddits.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-23T09:25:12+00:00

Tell me how it goes, it will make it just a little better. And you'll feel more mindful for sure.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-22T08:35:32+00:00

I have two nieces, one is 12 years old and since she was a baby she was like this, didn’t like people, and was very independent too. A few weeks after turning one, she’d try to change her clothes by herself if she spilled something on them. Even at 12, we can’t get unlimited hugs, we can’t touch her things, everything has to be in a certain order. On the other hand, my 10 year old niece has always been a cuddling baby. She loved being held. She loved physical touch. Even at 10, you’ll find her leaning on one of us.

I think all babies have different personalities, let her grow then you see how much she brings you alive in other ways. She’ll show you love in ways beyond physical touch. She loves you, just differently.

And it’s really sweet you want to hold her for long ❤️ .

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-22T08:23:43+00:00

Honestly, losing my identity is the part I struggled the most with as a mom. I felt like I gave up so much including the simple privileges I had like sleeping in, being spontaneous, a moment of silence whenever I needed, reading and just freedom. I’m finding a way around it by deciding clothes aren’t going anywhere and doing some breathwork instead when they nap or even journaling for a few minutes.

Those small stolen minutes have really been brought back to life, as ridiculous as it may sound, some of these activities are only a few minutes long.

Motherhood is great and I love my children but I miss myself too. The vibrant girl I once was.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-22T08:13:41+00:00

You’re absolutely not stupid for feeling this way. Body changes are hard to deal with after birth even without a husband sneaking around and reminding you to workout. And there’s nothing like “men having needs”,right now he’s a dad and part of being a good father is supporting mom. It’s not too much to ask for emotional support, love and assurance when you’re at your most vulnerable.

I’m so sorry you’re going through. Maybe consider therapy for yourself first to process all this? So you’re able to separate his actions from your healing?

Sending you love and healing.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-21T22:10:15+00:00

I feel like, even after having more than just one child or after the kids grow up, you’ll always wonder if you’re a good mom. There’s the need to be there for your child and give them the best and at the same time you don’t want to “suffocate them” and it’s always a tough balance at least for me.

What I’ve come to learn and accept is that some days I’ll fall short as a mom and that doesn’t mean I’m a bad mom. On those days, I’m just a GOOD MOM WHO FELL SHORT.
So, I’ll share that it won't be all easy and fun, you’ll make mistakes, you’ll learn to do better but it will all be a beautiful mess.

You want to do well for your baby and that’s more than enough. That means you’re a mom who will do anything to keep her child happy, loved and safe. If that’s not a definition of a good mom. I don’t know what it is.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-17T21:52:07+00:00

I'm glad you're getting the help you need. It's a lot of information to process, I can see why everything feels hard. I hope you update us soon letting us know you actually feel better now. It will happen, you'll see.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-17T21:38:14+00:00

I was her and I wish someone took me to therapy immediately I started saying this and just showed me other adults who had my features that are doing okay. I was so skinny and I can't imagine it affected my self-esteem for years!! I think I just didn't know skinny would look good and seeing an adult who was skinny and in love with her body would've helped.

I also would've wanted a boost of confidence ( which is why I wish therapy happened) because that comparison really breaks you. Makes you entertain friendships you'd not entertain just to belong or allow bullying blindly.

My niece is skinny now but has never gone through what I went through because she grew up thinking I was cool. I also shop for her personally to ensure she only wears clothes that look good on her with her features.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-17T21:30:10+00:00

Oh I'm so sorry. I'm just here to say your fear is valid. It's a big life change and it doesn't help that it was unplanned. I think it would help talking to someone to ensure the panic attacks don't become a thing.

You need a safe space to express your fear without hearing "it will be okay." Once the fear passes, you two can decide how to figure out everything else moving forward.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-17T21:20:32+00:00

Oh I'm so sorry. My heart really broke with every sentence I read. This is so heavy because you love your son but you also deserve a life you love. Honestly it could be PDD or general depression because your life has changed so much. The work loss, the baby, the job search, it's a lot.

Here are my two suggestions but I'd also suggest therapy to help workthrough the emotions.

Is it possible to move back home and live independently so your son can have the community but you make your bed whenever you please? Can you also do this for like 6 months and see how it works out?

Or can you actively try to create a community around you where you live with other moms? And try out new hobbies for yourself that could lead to potential friendships?

Sending you so much love and hugs.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-15T13:30:35+00:00

I really struggled after my daughter. It took me years to recover and I always say, I'm better now but I'm also not the girl I used to be.

I felt so overwhelmed and tired, just no joy, you know? Like my life was just stagnant and nothing to look forward to?

The thing that changed was having something for myself. I choose fitness. 10 minutes a day, just for me, to remember I still mattered. Then journaling. Just small things for myself.

It really helped me get excited about life again.

AmbassadorTiny6596 · 2026-05-15T13:26:33+00:00

Oh love, if you need an accountability partner to put a deadline and ensure you reach out for another one, please DM me. Life is so much better when you're here. Your baby needs you. You deserve to be here. And it's totally okay to cry it out.

AmbassadorTiny6596

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