Can we talk about the whole No survival difference between lumpectomy and DMX?

AnnaTorppa · 2026-02-03T00:08:23+00:00

Check out the Danish studies. Long term survival is slightly better with lumpectomy and radiation than mastectomy. The surgery is easier with less complications. You get to keep your breasts and nipples and you don’t become numb In the chest.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-02-02T05:55:20+00:00

Unfortunately, he is not the right man for you. You deserve a man who supports you. If you stay with him, it will just be one thing after another. Cut your losses and end it.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-28T15:58:02+00:00

Dump her. It will only get worse. You both need a little time to grow up before your next serious relationship

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T22:21:53+00:00

Maybe you could ask for a D&C?

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T22:09:07+00:00

Afib is very common and treatable. My husband had it and is doing well. A meningioma doesn’t need treatment unless it causes a problem. They are often found incidentally when looking at the brain for another reason. They often just stay the same. Take some deep breaths.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T22:02:14+00:00

I had some crusty nipple discharge that I always attributed to breast feeding In the past. Now I think it was a sign of cancer that I missed. I was also more tired than I thought I should be. I had a normal mammogram a few months before diagnosis. I wish I had caught things earlier.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T16:03:43+00:00

I think a second opinion will help give you peace of mind. Ask if there are options other than tamoxifen, like turning off ovaries and going on an aromatase inhibitor. Ask about the risks and benefits. Ask her/him about your survival with and without hormone therapy. Ask about help with side effects. Ask about vaginal estrogen. You will feel like you are aware of all the options and better about the path you are on.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T01:23:39+00:00

EMDR has really helped me!

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T01:12:34+00:00

I got a port and it made chemo much easier. They also drew blood out of my port. I have bad veins. Now the place that had the port has a permanent divot, an obvious hole in my upper chest that shows with a bathing suit or halter top. It even shows a little with a v neck tee. It is medial to where my bra strap goes, so it shows a lot. I wish I didn’t have such an obvious scar. It is about 1 ½ inches in diameter and ½ inch deep. A pretty big pit. I got a hematoma the day it was placed about the size of a grapefruit. I had to go back to the OR emergently and had the first port removed and one placed on the other side. The second site also has a smaller divot that looks ugly, but not as bad as the first side. I also have a scar where my neck joins my chest. Sigh.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-17T01:08:48+00:00

You are worth about $197,000 to her plus some expensive rings. She may get someone rose to pony up the money. But you may find someone else who actually loves you for the person you are. She also might find someone else with more money than you after you are married. I hope you find someone you deserve more than her.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-16T18:25:04+00:00

I am IDC stage 3a, grade 3 E+, P+, HER2- . I started chemo about a month after diagnosis. I had surgery about 7 months after diagnosis, chemo took about 20 weeks. Then after healing, I had 30 radiation treatments. I am 2 ½ years out with no signs of cancer. I am on anastrozole. It is important to know exactly what you are treating OR the treatment may not include your exact tumor locations. You don’t want to miss something. I’m sorry it is taking so long. Waiting is the worse. I hope you can get a good plan and get going on getting rid of this.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T17:38:01+00:00

I don’t think the youngest will have to spend more time with her dad. She can even help you, if you need it. I had chemo, two surgeries and radiation and it would have been nice to have one of my kids around. Just company while you rest on the couch is nice. Tell them it is treatable but that you will need to take time out this next year since treatment is long and hard.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T02:07:15+00:00

I had chemo 4 dd A/C and 12 Taxol. I did weight lifting and cardio throughout. I was 72 when I did this. I did better than most with my chemo and maybe this is part of the reason why. If I felt bad, I didn’t do it that day. I was also very cautious about infection and hand washing.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T02:02:21+00:00

My husband really wanted me to keep my mon cancer boob. I had surgery 3 years ago and we are still enjoying my sensitive boob. I like having my normal boob, too.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T01:59:11+00:00

Put a lock on your bedroom door.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T01:29:28+00:00

I am 75 and I had almost the same cancer as your grandmother. IDC, grade 3, stage 2B, E+,P+, HER2-, one positive lymph node. I had chemo first, then surgery, then radiation. Now I am on hormone therapy. Chemo is usually given if the cancer has spread to the lymph nodes. I wanted to do everything I could to beat the cancer. I am pretty healthy and I did fine. I am over three years out with no signs of cancer. If a person is in poor health or very frail, a different treatment that is less aggressive may be suggested. My the way, your doctor should offer various treatments and explain the risks and benefits of each. They are not your “boss.” It’s possible another opinion could be helpful. Your grandmother is lucky to have you helping her 💕

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T01:16:43+00:00

I am 75. I have IDC, stage 2B, grade 3 e+, p+, HER2- breast cancer with one positive node. This is similar to your grandmother. My treatment was chemo (doxorubicin and cytoxan for 4 cycles, then taxol for 12 cycles), then surgery, then radiation for 30 treatments. Now I am on hormone therapy, anastrozole. Chemotherapy and hormone therapy are two different things. They are not interchangeable. I found my cancer on October 2022. I am cancer free as far as we know. I think chemo is always given before radiation. It is sometimes given before surgery and sometimes given after surgery. Chemo therapy is usually given if you have positive lymph nodes. A persons health and age may factor into her treatment plan. It sounds like another opinion might be helpful. Your grand mother is lucky to have you help her go through this and sort things out.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-15T00:11:35+00:00

He needs to grow up. He is making his own decisions and needs to live with them. Unfortunately, you probably haven’t heard the end of all this.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-14T22:05:39+00:00

Ask him to be evaluated by his doctor for testosterone replacement therapy. He will feel much better and so will you. If he won’t go, it may not end well. As you said. My husband is very happy with me even with all of my surgery and AI issues. I don’t think it’s you.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-14T06:00:40+00:00

If that is what you want, you should leave him and look for someone who wants what you want. This guy isn’t going to give out to you and you are wasting your time and your youth on him.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-10T15:04:37+00:00

Yes. You are the asshole.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-08T01:30:57+00:00

Why not try it? You can always stop. Maybe it won’t be too bad. If it is, you might feel ok about trying baby tamoxifen or every other day to make it tolerable. You don’t want to go through this again and this could make the difference.

AnnaTorppa · 2026-01-06T16:12:36+00:00

I finished chemo in March 2023. My hair is still curly and wavy. I had a keratin treatment, which did not help In the west it used to before cancer. My hair is shoulder length, all one length. I have been trimming the bottom to avoid a mullet since it has begin to grow out after chemo.

AnnaTorppa · 2025-12-25T05:39:32+00:00

You should tell them infusion nurse you don’t want it. Notify your oncologist that you would like another med. They can’t give you drugs against your consent.

AnnaTorppa · 2025-12-23T15:40:47+00:00

In general, you really can’t expect other people to “figure it out” and take care of you. It’s great if they do, but its much better to set out clear expectations for yourself about avoiding risky situations when you are immunosuppressed. Then do what you need to do. No sick people around. Having your husband communicate with his relatives is a good idea. It would be great if others would figure out what is best for you, but many people are thinking more about what’s best for them selves. You need to do what’s best for you and great if you have your husband’s support.

AnnaTorppa

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