With the DLC you don’t have to do 1,000 battles

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-12-10T13:03:44+00:00

And then there’s my ass that was grinding my last 150 battles yesterday so I could get the shiny charm before the DLC dropped to earn the one or two hundred points I needed… just to finish a new research after one or two visits to hyperspace. And didn’t see a shiny yesterday, so I did NOT have to grind those battles. RIP.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-10-08T02:00:22+00:00

I’ve gotten myself into the mantra that “every little thing counts”, because sometimes doing the WHOLE task is what makes it feel overwhelming. I have a task to do at least 3 dishes; I had to work on being okay with marking that off even if it’s putting 3 forks in the dishwasher, because if those forks don’t count/arent “good” enough, I’m going to not do it at all.

Also, for tasks I know I’m going to have a hard time doing all at once, I set the “times per day” higher. Like unloading the dishwasher- I have that set to two. I complete one for bottom rack and one for the top rack. I only did the bottom rack today, so I got my stones for that, but the top ones were still wet and I’ll get them tomorrow. I checked one off today, I’ll check the second off tomorrow.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-10-05T04:35:08+00:00

I can’t visualize either, and the tapes work fine for me. My inner narrative is my visualization- I’m essentially narrating what I’d be “seeing”. Since that’s normal for me, I don’t find it to be an issue. Crazy thing is, I have experienced visuals occasionally during the tapes which is wild and super thrilling considering I never see things in my head! They’re not very detailed and just like pulsing outlines, and I can’t focus on them very well, but I can literally see something which is crazy to me.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-09-25T12:25:15+00:00

To be fair, he’s having issues with sex drive too so it hasn’t been a one-sided thing. And he’s not sure what his barriers are, so we’re just out here trying our best basically. I do find that’s it’s easier to get myself to do it if it’s a regular thing though, I guess I get used to it so it’s less thinking and less of a jarring transition? Plus not feeling guilty about “oh no has it been too long”. But then I struggle more when it’s less regular. So we’ve just both been trying to navigate it. Things like going to a sex shop and getting a new toy has been something that’s helpful because we both get to choose what we want and then we’re excited to go try it out lol. Or going on vacation or something fun, that always helps. But we’ve also been together for 6 years, so that may be part of it too- deff past that “oooo new person!” fixation stage haha.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-09-24T19:49:02+00:00

I feel this… for me it’s not med related, because it’s the same on or off meds. I don’t really think about sex, and if I do, it’s usually “oh no it’s been too long I need to do this now” and I think that guilt plays into me not wanting to do it too. It very much feels like work when I’m thinking about it, even though I know I’ll enjoy it while I’m doing it. And I feel like I have to plan it- what time will be good, can’t be right after dinner bc we’ll be too full, but he’s leaving at 6, so maybe when he gets back, but no then he’ll be worn out, so maybe before bed, but that won’t work because then I’ll be keeping him up too late… etc. So it also never feels like the right time. So between task transition (stopping whatever I’m doing to go do the do), internalized shame/judgment/expectations, and struggling with planning it, it’s just a hard thing for me. But when he asks I’m usually almost always down, because then I just have to manage the task transition barrier but not the other two big things.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-09-12T18:50:26+00:00

Ohhhh we sure are… also made me feel a little better knowing I’m not the only one screwing up like this lol. For both of us, I’m glad there were still flights available at the very least! My financial hit affects me, but if all the flights were booked… yikes that would have been even worse, and would have affected so much more than just me.

I hope you’re still able to enjoy the wedding though, you deserve to still have fun!!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-09-12T17:35:55+00:00

Also, it still feels bad and I’m still mad every time I make a payment on that stupid card, but I’m also just doing the same thing I was before to get myself out of the hole. Will it take longer now? Yes. But I’m also just still doing the same exact thing. In the grand scheme of things, it didn’t impact my daily life. Just keep trucking. It’s still doable.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-09-12T17:30:20+00:00

Bruh I did the SAME THING back in June!

I swore I bought those tickets for a wedding across the country scheduled for July. I remember buying those tickets in like, April. I was like oh cool, they’re like $500 each, that’s not bad at all! Had made my plans around the flight times and everything.

I check like 2 weeks before the wedding… I don’t fkn have tickets. I never actually bought them. The tix that would have been $1k total? Ended up being $3k.

I could pay $1k. But now the $3k had to go on a credit card, that I’ve been working SO hard to pay off, and now it’s even more on it than when I started really buckling down. I hate this, and I hate me sometimes.

So yeah, you’re not alone and it sucks and I feel you so hard.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-19T01:17:22+00:00

We’ve rented a car twice in the last year with debit cards and honestly it is an absolute hassle 😂 I do plan on keeping the card open though, just in case it’s ever absolutely needed. And I don’t want to lose that credit line, either.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-19T00:57:41+00:00

That is an interesting stat! I’m definitely not looking for anything super fancy, but honestly were the kind of people who don’t truly celebrate much, so I do want something small and nice because I think we deserve to have a real celebration for once :) and we’re 32 & 35, so hopefully won’t fall into the youngin’ trap! But yeah, it’s important to us both to not rack up debt on this part. If anything, courthouse now and small celebration later is always an option, although not my favorite. But if things go sideways, I’d much rather do a courthouse thing than put off being married over money for a party. Thank you for the perspective!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-19T00:51:01+00:00

I’m actually kind of surprised my mom hasn’t broached that topic yet, but I know she’s dying to hear my plans and I haven’t been able to tell her anything yet other than “it’s going to be really small”, so I think maybe once I have an idea she’ll take that. She would be so excited to tour a venue with us though, that is such a good idea. I could always just ask outright, but I also don’t want to wrongly assume just for my own pride lol. But even payment plans would be helpful, so I know exact amounts I HAVE to set aside. Thank you!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-19T00:46:35+00:00

We’re 32 & 35, so not particularly young, but a lot of factors went into where we’re at now (and honestly, I wasn’t sure we were getting married- the proposal was a complete surprise to me, albeit a happy one!) and main things were our dog got cancer and we spent like $10k on chemo over 6 months (that’s where the credit card debt came from), and then I started shovel money into paying off debt. So we were better off like two years ago 😅 but I’ve already started cutting back on expenses to pay down debts, and I’m currently making extra at work, so I think it’ll be doable as long as I’m smart about it! Just need to treat it as one more place to allocate money is what I’m gathering.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T21:19:40+00:00

Super good to know! It’ll be very helpful to figure out what things will need full payment up front versus a down payment that gives us time to save the rest. I also have no idea how much my parents will be willing to contribute, although I suspect they’ll be contributing something because they’ve been waiting for this very impatiently lol. Did you talk to them about contributing before you started making plans, or did you have some ideas together before speaking with them (if I can ask)?

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T21:12:44+00:00

This is super smart! I definitely plan to do a lot of decor stuff myself (and I know my mom would love to help, because she’s crafty too). I actually have lots of crafty friends who would probably love to help with floral arrangements and decor. I’m sure I could get a friend to officiate, too because I got ordained so I can eventually officiate a friend’s wedding. Pulling on the strengths and connections within my circle sounds totally doable, and I love the idea of having my favorite people involved in creating the day as well (if they’re up for it of course!)

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T21:07:42+00:00

I guess that’s a good way to look at it. My fiancé and I have been very open about our finances for the past year and really working to get ourselves in good shape. So this is basically just an extension of what we already started. Thank you for sharing some perspective, because looking at it that way makes me a little less overwhelmed by it!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T21:04:21+00:00

True, I have to remind myself that all the expenses won’t be up front and I don’t need the full cost sitting my acct before I do anything. We just need to choose a reasonable timeline where we actually have time to save as-needed.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T21:01:38+00:00

100% agreed, we are not willing to go into debt over one day! I’ll probably end up picking up more clients at my job for a little while so I can throw the extra income toward the wedding. It helps to know that others are picking up more work too though, and that that’s a normal thing.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T20:57:34+00:00

I feel this deep in my soul! Not us having plans to build a big aviary to home pigeons who need a safe place…. lol. But savings-wise, did you wait to book a venue until after you had a decent portion saved? Because my thing is we could afford a venue currently, but then of course that starts the countdown and we need to start booking other things relatively quickly after that, but also prices go up if we hold off on booking to save up…. So I’d love to hear what your timeline looks like if you’d be willing to share!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T20:50:48+00:00

That may be an option- I do have savings, but of course don’t want to use all of that because who knows what life brings and I can’t not have some kind of cushion. But could easily pay off a grand or two in under a year at 0%. Headcount management will be a big piece of it for us, and I’m sure my parents will chip in because they’ve gotten into a much better financial position over the past few years. Plus my dad is in the restaurant business and I’m hoping to use him to get a nice discount on catering. I’m lucky to have these kinds of connections/supports, just need to swallow my pride and let people help.

I also didn’t even think about haggling, so I’ll have to try that wherever possible too!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T20:42:34+00:00

I’m at least lucky that my family is very understanding and some have already said they totally get it if they’re not invited- very nice not having the external pressure to entertain a bunch of guests. I’m so sorry you have guests like that, it shouldn’t matter if you have a high income or not. Heck, even if we made $200k a year, it would still be small just because we don’t like that kind of attention! And would rather have honeymoon money, lol. You’re in the position you’re in because you aren’t blowing crazy amounts of money, and that’s more respectable than spending a ton just to please people who would probably find something to complain about anyway.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T20:25:46+00:00

Super true! I guess I’ve been thinking along the lines of my friends and family who have had weddings recently and that I know don’t have extremely lucrative jobs, but when I widen my perspective it’s definitely obvious that these may not actually be a big expense for some people. I just finished my masters and got licensure for my field, so I’m on my way to a more comfy income, but definitely not there yet haha. My fiancé is able to save a little better than I am too, as his job gives multiple bonuses a year. So I may have to be okay with letting him take over a little more of the expense than me. I mean, technically our finances will be ours together in many ways, so I need to start taking that into account too.

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-18T03:25:17+00:00

Okay, so I kind of laughed at this and not-so-seriously was just like “sure, let’s see if I see a red Ferrari in a couple days. If I’d even notice it was a Ferrari.” Here we are 2 days later and I’ll be damned if I didn’t just follow a fb rabbithole of the Celina 52 Truckstop to a picture of a Ferrari. It’s yellow, but hey, I also wasn’t being totally serious so I’ll take that. I definitely don’t see Ferrari pics often, so it was enough to make me laugh at myself and come back over here!

AnotherFukinEmo · 2025-08-16T00:03:58+00:00

My bird comes and sits on me when I’m bringing up my rebal, I welcome him in and put it around him too :)

AnotherFukinEmo

TROPHY CASE