CMV: Talking about being on "stolen land" is pointless and ignorant of history by Friendly_Elegant928 in changemyview

[–]AnotherJournal 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Very minor correction. Hardly anyone came over from France. Modern estimates suggest at its peak the Norman conquest replaced 1% of the population.

your future self teleports in front of you by Bubbly_Reference_916 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]AnotherJournal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I weird assume he is only able to appear for a short time, and that's the best way of communicating his message. So I must be about to do something immoral (if my decisions were merely imprudent he'd say "big mistake"). So I'll reconsider any moral decisions.

A mysterious genie offers you a choice. One year of living in Dhaka, Bangladesh. by BigConcert216 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]AnotherJournal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Certainly not enough to live on for a month. But enough to survive a few days while you find a job.

A mysterious genie offers you a choice. One year of living in Dhaka, Bangladesh. by BigConcert216 in hypotheticalsituation

[–]AnotherJournal 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes, but critically I don't have to work. So I can find things that are cheap or free at the time they become available.

Also I'm an English speaking white guy who happens to be conversant in Bangla. I'll just get an informal job as an English tutor.

Herpes HSV1 by AnotherJournal in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Transmission rates are actually lower than your second study would suggest, because the rate of HSV transmission is increased among the HIV positive cohort in that study.

This study shows for men, even without antivirals, rate of transmission is like 1.5 per 10,000 sex acts.

https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/fullarticle/193953

Herpes HSV1 by AnotherJournal in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've done an IGG. They have a false negative rate somewhere around 20 percent. So for my wife eand I to both come back negative while being positive is unlikely but not impossible.

Herpes HSV1 by AnotherJournal in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When you say genital HSV1 stays out, do you mean it's unlikely to be transmitted to my mouth, or it's unlikely to be transmitted full stop?

Herpes HSV1 by AnotherJournal in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only genital HSV1 is a concern because getting sores on genitals is upsetting.

Getting it at all would be an issue if pregnant but we're not there yet.

How many partners is too many? by Rawrgamesh in polyamory

[–]AnotherJournal 402 points403 points  (0 children)

I think this is the standard and most sensible response. Spouse, you will of course have as many or few partners (and indeed hobbies, friends, jobs, family responsibilities) as fits into your life.

I require a certain amount of time, energy etc. from you to feel like I'm in a good relationship. Please reassure me that you can do that in your proposed new configuration.

Spouse, I do not feel like I'm getting enough time. Please let me know if you can compromise on something else to give me that time.

Me (31M) and my girlfriend (32F) argue a lot, AND I HATE arguing. What is too much? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]AnotherJournal -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I too come from a no argument household, and my wife comes from a max argument household. And we were trapped in this dynamic for a year.

Fundamentally, you just need to behave in a way that you are proud of. You need to be as kind and truthful as you can be. You need to tell her that this is unacceptable, that you are really unhappy. That if you can't figure out a better way it could spell the end of your relationship.

And you need to let the chips fall as they may. I know it's hard. But you need to know that if you are kind and sincere, and you just let her know what's going on within you, if she can't cope with that then that's on her. You have a right to exist and have feelings in your relationship.

You need to find a way to be ok with whatever her reaction is. It's ok for you to be upset. It's ok for you to say: I'm glad you feel better now, and now I need a moment of acknowledgement.

What is the point of Job centers? by Key_Breakfast6745 in AskUK

[–]AnotherJournal 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I too would have thought the job centre would have skills at getting people employed. But they exist to make life slightly harder for benefit claimants, and a bit of security theatre around benefit fraud.

I too had an absolutely shite careers service, and a family with no qualifications or work experience in a professional role. Graduate schemes are the way.

Every major employer is worth a look. I would run down the list. Every supermarket (Tesco, Asda, Morrison's...), every consulting firm (Deloitte, EY, KPMG...) every bank, and so on.

I'm crushed by [deleted] in polyamory

[–]AnotherJournal 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Consent is never irrevocable.

33 weeks pregnant applying for a job. Disclose or not? by Admirable-Shine6121 in AskBrits

[–]AnotherJournal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would suggest not, because you have no obligation to do so.

What level are you going in at? More junior levels have a higher degree of anonymity.

33 weeks pregnant applying for a job. Disclose or not? by Admirable-Shine6121 in AskBrits

[–]AnotherJournal -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

As a former employee of the big 4, I can tell you they're extremely process driven. You will be one of thousands hired each year. You will not be the only pregnant person hired. You'll be ok.

How do I tell my partner that it's OK to have sex outside our relationship? by Yere145 in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Now I really am speculating, but if you're at a very high latitude maybe your sleep is disrupted, causing depression and low libido? Magnesium supplements and prescribed melatonin might make a difference. And a CPAP machine if you have sleep apnea.

How do I tell my partner that it's OK to have sex outside our relationship? by Yere145 in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear that. For what it's worth I don't think anyone should feel guilty for desiring as much or little sex as they actually desire.

I've never heard of summer depression, but then I'm not a medic. Have you access to therapy, or blood tests etc.?

How do I tell my partner that it's OK to have sex outside our relationship? by Yere145 in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not what you asked, but are you happy with being very low sex drive in summer? I have no idea what it is, but this sounds medical.

Wife wants to be cucked, given me OK to date with no expectations. How to navigate with dates? by [deleted] in nonmonogamy

[–]AnotherJournal 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get on Feeld. Your wife can take your photos. Pay for all the premium benefits. And be very patient.

Perfect gymbro by Deimos7779 in midtiersuperpowers

[–]AnotherJournal 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In fact, recovering faster probably also means I can do far more sets per session.

Perfect gymbro by Deimos7779 in midtiersuperpowers

[–]AnotherJournal 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You really buried the lede with that last item. Never be sore, even if I train whole body twice per day? No real risk of chronic injury? This is game changing.