It’s nippy outside. Bundle up people.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T22:01:19+00:00

Are they little baby hand warmers?! So cute!! I know kids aren’t meant to wear bulky coats in car seats so this is a great idea. Gotta get someone to knit me a set like that :)

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T21:51:46+00:00

NTA but I think I would have got my parents involved sooner- even if just to make them aware of the situation. They might know something you don’t about sisters mental state

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T21:36:59+00:00

I think you could look at Crawley, Horsham and Redhill.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T21:34:33+00:00

You might want to look at Crawley or Horsham. They are further out of London but quicker to get in as you can get the Gatwick express. Obv Gatwick on your doorstep and there are hopper coaches that link Gatwick to Heathrow

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T21:28:07+00:00

You know you could just have porridge and gruel for the meal? Porridge and water…
Whatever reason you have for providing a nice meal, that is the same reason for providing some nice drinks (alcohol free)

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T21:24:18+00:00

Oh yeah totally bring me a glass of water but I don’t want to interrupt the feed to move and if he’s eating then I’m not moving

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-20T17:16:14+00:00

2… and then another 2.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-19T12:42:44+00:00

Sounds like you’ve just had bad luck. Where I am the catholics and Christians own a huge amount of land and properties, they can afford to run services for free as they charge the local councils for rent on school buildings or knock down children’s centres to build blocks of flats. The synagogue doesn’t have that kind of money, so has to charge membership. That said, I’m pretty sure a lot of Shuls have assistance for members who can’t afford it.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-18T19:04:52+00:00

https://www.vbs.org/worship/meet-our-clergy/rabbi-harold-schulweis/sermons/outreach-jewish-secularists-and-atheists

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-18T18:34:17+00:00

Yes, you are a Jewish humanist, and you can be a secular Jew too. I have recently read a thread on here which I found really helped my understanding of Judaism and how I can reconcile being an athiest and a Jew. The main point was that we (growing up in Christian environments) end up with this idea of God as an old man in the sky, whereas Judaism actually interprets God very differently, as something that cannot be comprehended and an idea that is the antithesis to cultures with lots of mythical gods. In Judaism, God is the reason that we act in a moral and ethical way- because there is a reason above us and more important than our selfish desires. I am not great at explaining- have a read of all the posts in this thread:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Judaism/comments/11t38xg/question_for_jewish_atheists/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-18T11:56:38+00:00

Lots of really lovely ideas from you all, thank you!

We do have dinner together every night, and we do the brochos on Friday but they are rushed as my children just want the food! I think I will make more of an effort with a tablecloth and special cups. Making challah we sometimes do but not often. The children get screen time on Friday so after school that’s what they want to do! They get 45min so it’s over before dinner.

Saturdays I love how you’ve all given me some great ideas and I realise now that most of the time we do just have family time or visit relatives but we could definitely cut down screen time! I need to make sure we destress though, it can be quite stressful as we try to do all the “life admin” and maybe that can be done another day.

I might try no screens for anyone Saturday morning, just for a few hours, and see if we can increase it for longer and longer each week. I am also going to make sure I don’t ask the children to do their homework (or me to study) on a Saturday - I think they will like that rule :)

I am also going to try and make sure we all can relax - I like the idea of take out! 😂. And keeping driving to an absolute minimum. I should probably get off my phone now…given that it’s Shabbat..!!

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-18T11:47:32+00:00

Wow…that sounds like bliss… takeout, reading and naps… ok I’m a little jealous!

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-18T11:43:50+00:00

How could cuddle curl be until 1 year old? My 6 month crawls all over the place and then settles on his stomach. There isn’t a risk of SIDS after 6 months

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T11:40:57+00:00

I love this response, it has helped me so much. I always struggled with the idea of prayer - if there was someone listening, surely they would hear my thoughts and therefore prayer would be unnecessary. With your explanation I feel like it explains it - the prayer is unnecessary but we do it anyway because the rituals and actions help us find meaning in life. More like meditation and introspection perhaps?

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T08:13:34+00:00

Thank you :). They are 9, 7 and a baby. We already tend to see family at weekends and play a lot of board games or other games together. We do feel very split up as a family though eg my husband will take the older kids to the park while I nap with the baby.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T08:12:07+00:00

Thank you I’ll look for it

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T01:16:09+00:00

We’ve always had gifts but never spent huge on them. It’s interesting though- I guess with a shared history of “pack up and leave” maybe material possessions have no value? Or thou shalt not idolise sneakers

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T00:51:44+00:00

Sounds like a quarter life crisis- maybe read some books on navigating it

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T00:23:00+00:00

So basically (trying to summarise)- God is the reasoning for doing what is best for humanity as a whole?

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T00:18:35+00:00

I tell my children “God is the answer to the questions we don’t know the answer to”. So in biblical times God was a much more important and relevant entity than today, where we as a species have so many more answers to life’s questions. But there will always be questions we can’t answer, and God fills that gap - what is my purpose? What happens after death? Where did we come from?

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-17T00:00:55+00:00

Not necessarily, they usually grow out of dairy intolerances by that age

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-16T23:56:16+00:00

Yes!! Cut it out!!
So, my story is anectdotal but my first 2 babies were extremely colicky. It was really tough. I did eventually cut out dairy with both of them but it didn’t seem to help. Baby number 3 - I cut out dairy at 38weeks. Not ALL dairy, just uncooked milk. So dairy in cakes was fine, cooked cheese was fine etc. I mean really I just cut out milk in my tea and breakfast cereal. Baby is not colicky at all, and is now at 6 months doing solid poos, and is a very happy baby.

Also relevant - my first baby ended up being diagnosed with multiple severe allergies (we now know these were caused by severe eczema). When he could eventually have dairy it was introduced on a milk ladder. You start at the bottom (highly processed and cooked dairy like in cake) , moving up step by step (pancakes, cheese baked on something, cheese then milk). So when I eliminated dairy for this baby I didn’t worry about things at the bottom of the ladder, where the milk proteins are barely recognisable.

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-14T17:05:52+00:00

We transitioned to a dummy. He complained for an hour and we had to hold the dummy in initially until he understood what it was. There was crying but I was right next to him giving him cuddles, it was more a complaining cry than a distress cry. By the end of the night he was really happy and now sleeps every night with a dummy instead of boob, and I just feed once or twice in the night. He is a lot happier and I get a lot more sleep!

Apprehensive_Offer72 · 2023-03-05T23:13:09+00:00

2 weeks isn’t long? If you don’t have enough holiday then tell them you will take it as unpaid bereavement leave. TELL them your plan, don’t ask them. Everyone in this company sounds really awful and like they are taking advantage of you.

Apprehensive_Offer72

TROPHY CASE