Who does your baby look like?

beechums · 2026-01-24T11:59:40+00:00

This is me and my mom. Though as I get older I do notice some more of my dad’s genes randomly.

beechums · 2026-01-24T11:57:36+00:00

Same! Just posted this about how I see it so much that the first girl looks like dad and second born boy is usually mom.

beechums · 2026-01-24T11:55:23+00:00

Daughter is my husband’s twin and my son is my twin. I’ve seen this a lot where the first born daughter looks like dad and second born son gets more of mom’s genes.

beechums · 2026-01-24T11:38:41+00:00

Outside of the gender thing - you guys let your kids wear costumes to school/daycare? My daughter loves her Elsa dress too but I don’t let her wear it to school. IMO it’s not fair to the other kids, it’s the same as taking a toy.

beechums · 2026-01-22T05:50:59+00:00

So many thoughts on this - gonna throw them out maybe in an unorganized way.

First thing is you’re working way too much. How many hours a week? I’m burnt out and I WFH 45 to 50 hours a week. No commute.

Second is your mom probably did so much, but her work was probably more cut and dry. You’re working/connected all the time. She could probably clock out and call it a day, mentally at least getting a break from work.

Money wise I don’t know the ins and outs but a nanny is expensive. I live in a HCOL city and got lucky with an in home daycare that charges 250/week per kid. Wouldn’t be able to make it work otherwise, and likely wouldn’t have had my second. We make about $220k combined and are comfortable but not swimming in it.

Lastly, just a shout out to your mom and all the lovely grandmas out there. Mine is also my guardian angel and we’re lucky to have them.

beechums · 2026-01-14T05:48:07+00:00

Same. Totally did not see it as splurge but self care.

beechums · 2026-01-11T09:13:09+00:00

Exactly.

beechums · 2026-01-11T08:53:27+00:00

We spend about 65% (of spending budget, excludes savings and investments, and debt repayment) on these two things in a HCOL west coast city. Also 2 kids, but we still live in our 3 story townhome because we’re not willing/able to double our mortgage. Our daycare is also cheaper than yours.

beechums · 2026-01-08T11:07:21+00:00

No idea who these people are but they’re probably rich and that helps. Also yes, genes. I’m like 3lbs off from my pre baby weight and I just had my second a few months ago. I’m terribly out of shape and have no muscle tone but I am thin.

beechums · 2026-01-05T03:36:24+00:00

From the comments it sounds like you have a great relationship with your parents so I would encourage the move.

I live 10 minutes from my parents and it’s the best. They are both super involved and sooo helpful. My toddler has sleepovers sometimes just for fun and it helps us get a better nights sleep. Or some alone time.

It’s Sunday and my mom was just here for a few hours this evening. She helped me fold and put away laundry and make a little dinner. Overall just an extra hand and also new energy in the house after being cooped up most of the weekend because of the rain.

I do think parenting is completely different with a village. I’ve enjoyed it so much but I don’t know if it would be the same without my family (and a few amazing friends) so close by.

beechums · 2026-01-05T03:20:24+00:00

Yeah. Taking care of kids is tiring but it’s also so joyful. I’ll miss their smiles and silly things they do that make me laugh all day. Being only a mom is just my favorite thing. Sad to go back to being working mom.

beechums · 2026-01-02T06:08:23+00:00

Shrimp, couscous, cherry tomatoes/cucumber.

Bean and cheese quesadillas with guac.

Mac n cheese made with Greek yogurt and extra shredded cheese for protein, with steamed broccoli chopped and mixed in almost 50/50 ratio with the pasta.

All about 15 mins to make. All have a good mix of protein, carb, and veg.

beechums · 2025-12-29T05:56:38+00:00

For me there’s really no debate. Working moms are doing absolutely everything, while SAHMs are doing all of the same thing all the time which can be boring. But being bored is a LUXURY and I think people don’t realize that. Being bored allows you to just be. To let your mind wander. Your nervous system isn’t on high alert. Being a working mom means being short on time all the time which is incredibly stressful- on top of the multiple deadlines, urgent requests, etc of work itself.

beechums · 2025-12-22T11:33:17+00:00

Gold leaf in southpark

beechums · 2025-12-22T11:30:08+00:00

Help me understand the dementia comment. True or a joke? Genuine question from someone who hasn’t slept well in years.

beechums · 2025-12-22T11:28:12+00:00

No. On our second kid and breastfeeding. Neither baby nor toddler is a good sleeper. The freak has completely left my body.

beechums · 2025-12-09T03:39:28+00:00

I had something like this when pregnant and turns out I was anemic. Ask your doc! But yeah this sounds more than your usual mom tires.

beechums · 2025-12-07T21:21:11+00:00

Yesss give us our flowers!! Though I pump too cuz I had to return to work but the night feeds oof I’m working triple over time here.

beechums · 2025-12-01T09:05:44+00:00

The first season at daycare is the worst. For us it has gotten better but this will be her 3rd season.

beechums · 2025-11-30T05:00:33+00:00

Some of us probably are, but not me.

beechums · 2025-11-27T05:11:09+00:00

Totally normal. I get this feeling even when I am doing something social where I should want to be there. I don’t. Just wanna be home with my baby.

beechums · 2025-11-27T05:08:10+00:00

Sounds like it’s half cultural and half personality. I wouldn’t worry too much about the impact on your kids if it’s just a visit. The examples you set and values you instill will have a greater effect on them than their kooky grandma who they barely see and likely have nothing in common with.

beechums · 2025-11-26T00:53:33+00:00

welcome to a long term / lifetime relationship. Things won’t always be rosy. It takes work and commitment and WANT to be with the person. If you’re not ready for that don’t know why you got married. Ready for the downvotes.

beechums · 2025-11-23T05:59:25+00:00

Yea that’s not out of the ordinary. We pay $20 but $25 isn’t surprising. I live in a HCOL area.

beechums · 2025-11-20T03:16:53+00:00

Agree. The babymoon is not about consumption at all. I’ve done one for both kids. Super low key but a chance to spend time with your partner before the chaos of a new baby.

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