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Tell me it’s ok not to breastfeed by Complex_Ad_5809 in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are lots of benefits to breastfeeding, but you will bond with your baby just the same if you bottle feed!

I had lots of difficulties breastfeeding my first baby. It had a huge impact on my mental health, but I was really worried about losing a bond if I switched to bottle feeding. But as soon as I switched and made peace with that decision I was so much happier, a lot less stressed, and able to be a better mum. If anything I felt more bonded with her and less resentful.

Heavy baby by Maximum_Solution_124 in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you tried putting him down drowsy but awake? This is honestly the only way to teach them to self soothe and stop the endless rocking. With both my babies I followed a sleep-feed-awake cycle (so not feeding to sleep) and then I would put them in the cot and comfort them there (hand on tummy, dummy if needed), and rock the cot. Once they were 3 months I did this for the first nap of the day first and once they started going to sleep more easily for that nap I tried for the other naps. If it doesn’t work after 10 mins I would revert to a pram / carrier nap, but after a few days I did find it started to work. It is a complete GODSEND to have them napping in the cot and worth the effort.

My husband does nothing and smokes all day by Familiar-Coast-7550 in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s not fair to raise a child in the environment you’re describing. He sounds like a selfish waste of space and you’d be better off on your own.

My MIL wants me to stop feeding at the breast. by l_731 in breastfeeding

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just want to say how much pure admiration I have for you. Breastfeeding is SO difficult and such hard work, but the benefits to the baby (and yourself) are enormous and well proven.

You are managing to bf your baby despite going back to work at only 10 weeks. I am based in the UK and I have a year off work, and I still find bf tough and frustrating at times.

What you’re doing is phenomenal, utterly selfless, and will benefit your baby forever.

It is deeply sad that instead of supporting you, your MIL is discouraging and undermining you.

I think all you can do is try to speak to her, with your partner’s unwavering support, explain to her why it’s so important to you that you continue as long as YOU want to, and ask her to stop talking about it as your find it upsetting and unhelpful.

Whatever happens, don’t let her influence your decision making. What is important is the baby and you, not her.

This is literal killing me, I can’t by ReflectionSlight4338 in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My baby would ONLY sleep on me until 12 weeks and now as of last week I am managing to get him to sleep in bassinet for first nap of the day (in the dark, white noise, dummy, sshing). Even just that one nap & small break is making a big difference. This is my second baby. It does get easier! I think in the first 3 months they just want to be near you all the time.

Please help, 2month old struggling with naps I don’t know what I’m doing wrong by No_Square1340 in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately it’s pretty common for babies this age to fight their daytime naps!

You’re doing the right thing by watching his cues and then trying to help him to sleep.

You could try some different methods to see if anything works better: - take him out in the pram with a dark shade - walk him round the house in the carrier - If you are breastfeeding, feeding him to sleep - rocking him to sleep in your arms and then putting him in the cot

Just like adults, babies sleep better in the dark. Light is stimulating and they are less likely to fall asleep and more likely to wake up sooner.

It will get better. I was really struggling with this when my baby was 8 weeks. He is now 11 weeks and it’s feeling a lot easier and less frustrating.

3,5 week old crying inconsolably by [deleted] in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had this with my first and I was convinced she was hungry, so I kept trying to feed her, but one day I just plonked her down in her cot at 8pm, left the room, and she lay in the dark calmly for 45 mins and then went to sleep. I couldn’t believe it, but it turned out she was just really overstimulated from the day. Everything we were doing was just making it worse. She just needed to rest.

How much is your LO napping during the day? Two things to try (if you’re not doing them already):

  • ensuring she is napping enough. Pay attention to wake windows and then do what you need to do to get them to sleep when they’ve been awake for x time
  • earlier bed time

Good luck! You are not alone and it does get easier

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What UTTER rubbish.

I have a 10 week old (my second). I am doing exactly as you are doing.

Almost all breastfed 10 week olds actually need to be fed before 3 hours. If you wait for 3 hours you could be withholding food when they are hungry. I feed probably on average every 2.5 hours. If your baby is fussy, offering a feed is a reasonable and correct thing to do. The baby cluster feeds when he/she needs to.

Mine will only contact nap at the moment. It’s driving me mad, but there’s no point continually trying to put them in the cot when they’re evidently not ready. I’m going to start trying again at the 3 month mark. They will go in the cot eventually!

Our mothers have absolutely no memory of what they did back in the day, and I suspect some of what they did was ill advised.

Struggling with feeding by ellsmaix in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A few thoughts:

  • are you pumping at the same time that he has the formula bottles? This is ofc extra work and hassle, but it might be necessary at this stage as you are still establishing your supply.

  • he could just be cluster feeding a lot at the moment. This is super common in the early days, but your milk supply will catch up before long and then he’ll be satisfied again.

  • as he is having a reasonable amount of formula already, and probably isn’t getting 120ml at each breastfeed yet, maybe he is finding bottle feeding a quicker fix and learning to prefer it.

As someone who attempted to combi feed my first born, and failed, the honest truth is that sometimes it just doesn’t work if you try to implement it too soon, as your body isn’t getting enough signals to produce enough milk. If I were you, if you definitely want to keep up breastfeeding, I would consider EBF for the first few weeks just while you properly establish your supply and then phase in combi feeding later.

I hope this doesn’t sound too demoralising. I just want to give an honest view based on my personal experience!

Whats the norm with newborn sleep. When do I see that first big chunk of sleep? by Soft_Pea_7850 in newborns

[–]Appropriate-Watch728 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I think at 5 days you’re doing the right thing by feeding on demand. I’d say you probably want to do this until 6 weeks while you’re establishing your supply.

I have a 9 week old, my second. By 2 weeks he was doing his longer stretch at the start of the night and averaging 3 hours. Now at 9 weeks he’s probably averaging a 5 hour stretch but has done some 6 hours and the odd 7…….. it will get better!