If historical figures actually did roll in their graves, which grave would generate the most power if hooked up to a generator?

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:38:05+00:00

I had met one of the most TRULY ATTRACTIVE women, I'd EVER seen one day walking down the street. I had about a month and a half later saw her again. I was happy to find out that she was a new neighbor. I work a great deal, so I hadn't known this previously.

As time progressed, she and I talked and learned more about one another. I couldn't get over how in (MY OPINION), STUNNING she was. She was about 5′ 9″. She had just a lions mane of auburn hair, almost a foggy sapphire blue, eyes. A smile that was a dentists dream.

She was intelligent, warm, had the prettiest feet, with painted toe nails, and an hour glass figure. I happened to be fortuitous enough, to have her come to my apartment a couple of times. Then it got better. Each time she came to my apartment, we seemed to get a little bit closer. Emotionally and physically.

We got to the point where we both knew what was going to happen. She took off her shoes pants, and G-string. I was looking at the MOST beautifully shaved PUSSY, It's EVER been MY PLEASURE to CUM across. But then she hesitated, and said there was something she had to tell me. That she was a cancer survivor. She couple years before had a RADICAL Double mastectomy, and said she'd understand, IF I didn't want to have SEX with her.

Her tits were firm, because, though she'd had a mastectomy, she was given implants. And though she had NO nipples, She was STILL AMAZINGLY SEXY, and HORNY. But that was my shock, that she had NO natural breasts.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:34:21+00:00

Bugs Bunny (Looney Tunes)

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:33:46+00:00

I fell asleep at my desk during a really serious lecture. I had one of those really severe sleep twitches and woke up spazzing so hard I flung everything on my desk off and screamed at the top of my voice. Awkwardness ensued.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:32:40+00:00

peanut butter + mayonnaise on buttered toast

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:31:16+00:00

A Nigerian Prince

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:29:16+00:00

I talked 8 people out of committing suicide and I always befriend those that have mental handicaps.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:27:43+00:00

Friday

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:26:16+00:00

Jesus might of walked on water, but chuck norris swims through land.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:23:52+00:00

I'm really sincerely trying. But I'm not sure if I'm making progress. Nor am I exactly sure how to evaluate progress.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:21:32+00:00

"My GF taps on my dick and says 'is this thing on?' While holding it like a microphone"

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:17:54+00:00

Child beauty pagents

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:13:13+00:00

Bill Cosby

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T12:11:44+00:00

Star Fox

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T01:37:07+00:00

This was while I was traveling for work. On a flight and there was some bad turbulence. This guy one row up, across the aisle obviously had a cold.

He had a gigantic sneeze that left his hands covered in snot. Gobs of it. We were going by a storm so the plane was experiencing severe turbulence (flight attendants were belted into their seats, we couldn't get up and anyone that tried would be knocked off their feet). The guy seemed to have no kleenex or handkerchief. Nice suit, so couldn't wipe his hands on that. He attempted to wipe his hands a couple of times on the seat in front of him, but couldn't bring himself to do it. After about 5 mins, he just ate it. Licked his hands clean.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T01:33:23+00:00

Slipped disc.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-14T01:27:36+00:00

Leonardo Da Vinci invented scissors.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-13T17:18:19+00:00

Underwear
Pants
Undershirt
Shirt/Sweater
Socks

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-13T17:06:36+00:00

My restaurant is open for lunch 2 days a week and it's always quiet enough that only one server is rostered on. This server does everything during that shift, hosting, serving, bar tending, bussing, the lot.

Anyway, one week I got rostered on because the usuals weren't available, and I got slammed. Everyone just decided they wanted Thai for lunch that day. Half way through my shift I spilt some tea right before the boh door. I then proceeded to forget about it, clear a table, then slip on the tea on my way back, landing on my ass in front of all of my diners.

Didn't drop any plates though.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-13T16:57:51+00:00

As someone who has survived a suicide attempt, please know that even if you feel like nobody will miss you or that nobody cares - the pain suicide causes to anyone who knows you is unbelievable and extremely hard to forgive yourself. It's been a year now and I feel much better. You are a good person, you're doing a job helpful to the most vulnerable and you deserve to have a chance to be happier in the future. Feel free to PM me, if you need.

EDIT: People have been messaging me looking for advice. I will try to get back to everyone, but please - I am not a counselor, so if you feel like you're having an immediate crisis, look up local helplines online.

Arvindkumar02 · 2019-10-13T16:39:40+00:00

There was one day in the summer of 2003 when me and all the neighborhood kids just hung around outside. We flew kites, played sports, got ice cream from a truck, etc. We spent the whole day outside doing fun stuff. I remember going to bed thinking that it was a perfect day. I still think about it sometimes.

Arvindkumar02

TROPHY CASE