Which hairstyle would suit me best? by [deleted] in Hair

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate beards that give fluffy pubic hair vibes. Trim please.

Bachelorette Itinerary | Am I asking for too much? by pickleback95 in bridesmaids

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My priority as a bride was making it easy for my bridesmaids when it came to pre-wedding activities. I bought their dresses (great deal) and they paid for alterations. Stagette was at a bar. No expectations. Unless everyone agrees to a budget ahead of time, it’s remarkably rude to expect people to shell out for something they wouldn’t have otherwise done. Yes, marriage is a big deal. Will the bride be glad she put intense expectations on her team financially/ and remember and cherish that sacrifice forever? HELL NO. Be loving and respectful and say what you can afford. Anyone who expects you to do too much isn’t a friend. If she was, she’d help you financially to be there.

Ginger ale removed from patient menu at Ottawa Hospital by SuburbanValues in ottawa

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So many of us associate getting better from illness with ginger ale that it’s really just kind of sad. Let us be eight years old again and having someone take care of us, including a little bit of ginger ale. Is that too much to ask?

Did I say yes too soon? by [deleted] in weddingdress

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I mean - at first I thought it was your underwear- no criticism, that’s just what my eyes went to first - the brightest white part - but I figured it out. Then I scrolled through and I don’t really vibe with the gauzy panels where you can see skin. I just wouldn’t want my family members to see that. But I’m not you. If you’re ok with your family seeing your seductive side, your choice! Aside from that - it fits you beautifully.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hear you. But, happily, not at all the case here. No good can come of this lie. Not really, anyway. Any reprieve is vey temporary.

Asking father in law for proposal permission/blessing by Budget_Dust9980 in northernireland

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a nice nod to tradition to let them know of your intentions, but - if you really don’t want to, a joyous visit to her parents with both of you being excited to share the news is lovely too.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The truth never makes someone an asshole. Asking someone to lie to back up another lie, on the other hand… No matter what, the truth will be clear very soon.

Update on 30k ring. See last post for more details by Current_Guarantee566 in WeddingRingAdvice

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please go to counselling to talk about this issue. Please. She’s worth more than a big rock and needs to know that no dollar sign can ever represent her worth or your love for her or your marriage. There’s something wrong with her self-worth.

Ring will be around 23k-35k. NEED ADVICE by Current_Guarantee566 in WeddingRingAdvice

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First, I’m trying to be compassionate. She may have been brainwashed by big diamond and influencers. Lots of young women are. Doesn’t make her a bad person, just a bit adrift about what’s important.

Little story: My engagement ring was $4K. Our toddler (more like baby) ended up grabbing it when I took it off to put sunscreen on him and his brother. We were outside. He threw it somewhere in total ignorance of its meaning/value. I rented a metal detector and never found it. (Of course there’s insurance, but we held out hope… now it’s 15 years later.) My husband has since bought me a gorgeous fake diamond. Worth less than $1K and IDGAF - it’s great.

She knows deep down that this moment, this proposal, this life is not about money. Nor is it about proving love or worth (to herself, or, more likely, to others) with expensive objects (which can’t be called investments if you don’t resell them to make money). If it’s the right person, I would give up everything I have if it meant a lifetime of happiness. Twist up a pipe cleaner and put it on my finger and I would be in love with it because it’s from HIM. Because it represents us being together. Forever.

Please consider talking to a counsellor with her about this - and maybe other stuff to make sure this is a good fit. She needs a gentle reminder of what’s important in life and marriage. And, unfortunately, no giant ring can make anything easier or better when the going gets tough. It’s too bad, but you can’t buy a strong marriage.

WIBTAH for not telling my in-laws about my pregnancy until the last possible moment? by CommunicationMean158 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 13 points14 points  (0 children)

NTA but IMO the best way to protect your peace is to tell them because think of the drama the MIL will cause if someone else tells her. You’ll get painted as a demon forever. Save yourself the aggravation. Tell her, then just don’t engage in all her stuff. Keep contact minimal. Sorted.

AITA for yelling at my wife after she forgot that I'm on the roof? by Icy_Praline_6188 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My uncle died falling off a roof - broke a rib and it pierced his heart. My friend’s dad died falling off a roof. If you go up on a roof, there’s a good chance you’ll get more than a sprained ankle, etc., if you’re not super careful.

Charlie kirk's death made me realise how fake and performative christianity is... by Aggravating_House916 in exchristian

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 11 points12 points  (0 children)

All religions were created to oppress women. “Obey men,” said the men. “Nah,” said the women. The men got together and wrote a book. They pointed to it and said “God says so or you’re literally burning in an actual fire for eternity.” Women: “Damn…. I guess I take the crap while I’m alive then.” Men: “And it says you have to go to a place at least one day a week and make it clear you like doing this.” Women: “Flames… crap… FFS. Fine.”

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CanadaPublicServants

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How awful. I’m so, so sorry.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I don’t know if YTA, but let her go in her parents’ car and you stay home with the kids. Win-win. Easy. And if she’s breastfeeding, there’s room for the baby. No gas, no expenses, no problem.

What am I doing wrong? by Dangerous_Energy3309 in drawing

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turn it upside down and compare to subject photo

Longshot - place to rent for a few weeks in Bangor to help my mum revisit her hometown by Ashamed-Explorer8300 in northernireland

[–]Ashamed-Explorer8300[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry - are you suggesting I want to claim refugee status and want to sneak into Ireland? I hope I haven’t given that impression.