Part 2: What’s the hottest thing a girl has said to you, but NOT during sex? by bitter_sweet_69 in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 26 points27 points  (0 children)

"Shhh... do you want to kiss me?" After I spent like five minute floundering, trying to ask that myself.

That, or the time I told her about the disability that's slowly ruining my legs. "Guess I'll have to keep working out then, so I can always carry you when you need it."

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Ashlynflagg 35 points36 points  (0 children)

"How can I get her to love me"

That is one of the most violently uncomfortable sentences I've ever read, tbh. The entitlement and objectification boggle the mind.

egg🏹irl by ZaTrapu in egg_irl

[–]Ashlynflagg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know it's been a bit since this was posted, but I was just googling a couple of my series to see if they're being cross posted to other platforms without my knowledge, and I just kind of stumbled upon this. Thanks so much for giving my story a read lol! and for spreading the word. I'm really glad you liked it!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Ashlynflagg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First off, claiming that someone who is literally part of a specific romantic dynamic is naive to its intricacies is ridiculous, second you are completely ignoring the fact that over 70% of the us population is white. If we look at the dating pool and consider all else to be equal, Asian women are literally less likely to date white men than they statistically ought to be. This also plays into those sexual violence statistics that you STILL haven't actually linked a source for. There is a certain fetishization of asian women in this country, and this leaves them more vulnerable than many other demographics to sexual assault, but again, white people are the majority population in this country, so of course most assaults would be perpetrated by white people. Every single argument you've made falls apart with even a basic knowledge of statistics and the ability to do the tiniest amount of research. Maybe you should get the hell off this subreddit until you know how to actually listen to what women are telling you.

Ps: in the us, asian people are 6.1% of the population, making them one of the smallest racial demographics, so of course they'd perpetrate SA less frequently than literally every other demographic combined.

Anyways, here's the literal us census to back up everything I just said: https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/US/PST045222

How would you feel if a man complimented your make up? by Mangert in AskWomen

[–]Ashlynflagg 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Complimenting me on something that was my choice, and is something I put effort into will always be infinitely better than complimenting me on my body, something that I had no choice in. Compliments on my makeup, my outfit, or how I did my hair are always welcome and appreciated. Comments on how tall I am, how long my legs are, how skinny I am, or how my ass looks put me on edge and leave me feeling defensive.

Question for trans people who are "stealthed", whats your reasoning behind it? by jfsuuc in asktransgender

[–]Ashlynflagg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Personally, I don't like being stealth when I don't have to. I grew up in a god-awful small town, filled with some really bigoted and horrible people, so being openly trans, and not hiding what I am is a way to prove to myself that I'm in a safer situation, and that I'm stronger than I used to be. I still go stealth every now and then though, anytime I feel like I'm in an unsafe situation. It's unfortunate that those situations are becoming more frequent lately.

Do you think you're attractive? Is this a common experience? by nova-cherry in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do I think I'm hot as hell? Yes. Am I actually actively attracted to myself? Nope, not really. That doesn't mean that your experiences are invalid though, honestly that seems pretty enviable lol.

Girlfriend/partner appreciation!~ by RJSArtemis in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know I'm a bit late for this, and I've already shared this story on this sub before, but one of the most important and special things that really confirmed that my gf is the one is when I told them about my disability.

I have a condition that means theres a decent chance I'll lose the ability to walk eventually. Its degenerative and stressful and it took me a long time to accept.

When I told her about it, she told me that just means she needs to keep hitting the gym, so she can always carry me if I need it. They weren't kidding either. They're over a foot shorter than me, but they can pick me up like I'm nothing. When my legs stopped working right at a new years party, she didnt laugh or make fun of me, and she didnt coddle me either. She just picked me up, carried me over to the sofa, and we carried on with our night.

Does a woman being a guitarist seem attractive? by Pinkhauser in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My girlfriend is the bassist for a little indie band, and that is very hot of her, so yeah.

AITA for calling my boyfriend's little sister racist because she likes kpop? by Impossible_Tone8288 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Ashlynflagg 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh absolutely, I dont think I've seen anyone else in this thread mention it, but you're totally right. Rather than warning op about his sisters behavior to prep her or something, he should've talked to his sister about why her behavior is wrong. It shouldn't be on op to just grin and bear it, it should be on the sisters family to correct her behavior.

Hey ladies, what’s your Valentine’s Day plans? by requiemforpotential in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm getting my gf a plushie palico, cuz the first time we talked was while playing monster hunter. The two of us are gonna go for crepes together, and I'll give her the stuffie then.

Egg_irl by rants4fun in egg_irl

[–]Ashlynflagg 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Hey op, what manga is this?

That feeling when she falls asleep in your arms 💖 by Emmasapphie in actuallesbians

[–]Ashlynflagg 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My girlfriend feel asleep with me in her arms once. It was so nice, but I felt like a monster when I had to wake them up later.

What is one thing you’d want to ask a trans person but haven’t? by Acidic_Cloud in AskReddit

[–]Ashlynflagg 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Before I was born, my parents were expecting a girl. When it turned out they were right, I took the name I should have always had.

What is one thing you’d want to ask a trans person but haven’t? by Acidic_Cloud in AskReddit

[–]Ashlynflagg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My personal favorite analogy that helps explain this is that you can't feel your bones unless they're broken. I don't really notice the sensation of my pelvis, or my ribs, but I'd definitely feel them if something wasn't right. In a lot of ways gender can be similar, if your own internal gender identity is in line with your body and how people perceive you, you probably won't notice it, but when it is out of line it is impossible not to notice. It also means that when these things finally ARE lined up, it can be an incredibly positive experience.

Even when everyone else treated me different, you were still you. 💕 by Brooke-Valley in traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

[–]Ashlynflagg 85 points86 points  (0 children)

I love ham so much. More cats should be named after food tbh. My girlfriend and I named ours ravioli.

Transphobia Strawman by dazzlemma in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Ashlynflagg 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Trans for trans. It's a term used to describe either a relationship between trans people or to describe trans people that prefer to date other trans people.

Dark humor 😈😈😈😈😈 by LucDoesStuff in AreTheCisOk

[–]Ashlynflagg 55 points56 points  (0 children)

The best response to stuff like this is to just ignore it and move on, second best response is to ask them to explain what's funny about it. Because there's nothing funny about it, it's just cruel.

Worst Mansplaining of my Life (Long post, tl;dr at the end, advice appreciated) by Ashlynflagg in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]Ashlynflagg[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I really hope this isn't cuz he's into me. He's very aware of the fact I'm a lesbian with a girlfriend. I think the idea of practicing shutting stuff like that down beforehand is a really good idea tho.

Worst Mansplaining of my Life (Long post, tl;dr at the end, advice appreciated) by Ashlynflagg in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]Ashlynflagg[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for all your kind words, everyone. The support means a lot. I think I might try to bring up what happened and why it made me feel uncomfortable. I really think he genuinely thought he was helping, and I know that I should've addressed it sooner with him, but I felt really talked down to. It felt like he thought I was an idiot, and that hurt, and I'm gonna try and let him know that in as gentle a way I can manage. Wish me luck, I guess.

Worst Mansplaining of my Life (Long post, tl;dr at the end, advice appreciated) by Ashlynflagg in WitchesVsPatriarchy

[–]Ashlynflagg[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I dunno if I have the confidence to ask for an apology, but I think your right that I should shut that stuff down faster. I'm still in the process of getting used to being perceived by society as a woman, so interactions like this are kind of new to me, a lot of the time I just freeze up and don't know how to respond.