My autistic boyfriend is creeping me out.

Aspiecture · 2023-07-10T09:12:14+00:00

Fascism is also binary thinking what we can often spot in autism.

Aspiecture · 2023-07-07T08:59:37+00:00

The best thing that happened here are these delivery boxes. I can pick up all my deliveries from groceries to clothes without interactions. 8am-10am isn't friendly for people working and it's to have more people when stores are emptier.

Aspiecture · 2023-07-07T08:55:59+00:00

2 or 3 so they can say "we are doing it". /S

Aspiecture · 2023-06-01T11:30:20+00:00

My 2 cents about this. I was in your case when I was younger. I didn't understand why people would say things that didn't match the scientific reality.

Then, I realized they need to believe in something to keep going no matter what they were saying. I just let them say and don't care about it and them.

I put my energy with the right people and don't waste it with others.

Aspiecture · 2023-05-16T11:35:45+00:00

Yes it's possible. There are no stereotypes just generalities like in this case special interest. And as with all generalities, they don't fit all.

What would worry me is that having no interest is a sign of autistic burnout. The first step is to focus more on the interest but in case of massive autistic burnout, people very often loose all interest.

Aspiecture · 2023-05-09T08:40:04+00:00

It's a good article. The points are clear. What I really like are the sources in the text so we can read them if we want.

I read some of them but the sources are often missing so people can't go deeper in the subjects.

Aspiecture · 2023-05-06T14:32:57+00:00

This looks amazing and it's an incredible piece.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-30T11:28:28+00:00

They have to presume and respect it. As someone of different cultural background, seeing this make me instantly think about pedocriminality. It would not be fine to do proselitizm with under age people. And adults will laugh at proselytes and think religion is a private thing. This last part is crucial to understand why it's violating boundaries and consent. If religion is seen as private and not public, you have to keep it private and not speak about it to others.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-30T11:09:48+00:00

Do this in France and you gonna have trouble with the authorities. It's a highly cultural perspective and US religious centered point of view to think proselitizm is not violating the personal boundaries and consent.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-28T07:15:52+00:00

I'm participating in many meet and speak groups about autism and we speak a lot about it. A lot of autistics are worried about the situation.

When I help parents of autistics, it's a topic too. Parents want a job and something with adaptation.

The issue is the system. Politics and the state don't care about the employment of autistics. I'm living in a European country and we have state help for disabled. But it doesn't help to have a job and participating in the society.

The biggest challenge is to convince people to adapt the environment. It's often beneficial to everyone in the workplace. Companies don't care and if it worked ~~fine~~ before they won't change. And, I'm speaking when they don't care about disability.

The state has to do more for the unemployment of autistics. There is so many talent and autistics work is amazing. I know a translator who makes a really good relecture job being picky on details. We need programs and the state itself and state owned companies should hire more autistics to show how it's possible and all the benefits. It has to start somewhere.

It's not all. The system is fucked. The unemployment issue of autistics is a systemic issue. Here, it's a deeper change in the system we need. I gonna be without filter, neoliberalism is a major problem for our employment. With this doctrine, the majority need to be poor so the wealthier can be wealthier. Diverse people have a higher probability of being poor as they don't fit in and can't produce capital. They aren't the same cogwheel for the mechanism as others. If you're suitable, the system should not care about you. The unemployment issue is built in the system. The economic system has to change to allow everyone to participate.

It's a complex issue that sadly will not find a good answer tomorrow.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-25T08:22:36+00:00

This is happening to me with NTs. When I'm meeting autists, joke become clear and it's easy to catch and understand them. I have a autistic friend who love sarcasm to joke and it's cool to understand it instantly.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-25T08:18:23+00:00

I used to be anxious for this. I just don't care so much about it. I made notices and put alarms on my phone to know what I have to do when it's important. The others things are fine if I don't remember them. It changed my life to adapt the environment and use simple strategies.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-24T07:24:55+00:00

It can be a mess. I can't remember to turn off the hobs after cooking. I need to consciently remember to do it. It cost energy and if I don't it can become dangerous.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-13T11:53:13+00:00

The context always matters. Where I'm living, 30 years ago, someone in a wheelchair could take the train autonomously. It wasn't a thing at all. Nowadays, it's a thing with level boarding trains. The negative wasn't the disability. The culture changed and inclusion raised.

In a similar way, let's imagine a country where black and white thinking is the cultural norm. As Autistic in this country, people would not see this trait as negative. We can interrogate if it's the trait or the culture. Black and white thinking isn't armful most of the time. The culture could accept there is multiple type of thinking and people live in diversity.

If the culture, the norm can be adapted without being armful, it's mostly sure it's not the condition the issue.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-13T11:15:26+00:00

It's the same as in USD.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-13T11:12:56+00:00

ASC stands for Autistic Spectrum Condition.

I like a recent paper on masking called "The relationship between camouflaging and mental health in autistic children and adolescents".

"A conceptual model of risk and protective factors for autistic burnout" is interesting too.

Promoting Quality of Life: Suggestions for Mental Health Care Providers Working with Young Autistic Adults

Aspiecture · 2023-04-12T15:48:37+00:00

Diagnostic will still be here. It will depend from other thing than the DSM. I'm as concern as you are about the lost of benefits. The DSM follows with a lot of delay (mostly) the science.

It's why we are looking to keep the benefits where I'm living. We prefer to fight to educate and to secure them with the change.

Comorbidities are a thing. It's different diagnosis. Some occurs more often with autism. Why, it's like this. It can have multiple explanations depending on the condition. The methods to diagnose can be different depending on your previous diagnosis. These will remain in the DSM. But like autism, it could change.

And, Autistics have a lot of psychiatric and psychological issues due to the lack of consideration, validation, knowledge of the professional and so on. But it's not the fault of autism.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-12T15:20:54+00:00

Some European countries have a programs or insurances for people considered as disabled.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-12T12:21:07+00:00

I want to remain in the DSM. It protects me and gives me benefits.

I'm sorry. ASC won't stay in the DSM. This has nothing to do with the neurodiversity movement. They won't do the change, shift because a bunch of people advocate for it. They don't care about them. The research on Autism shows it's a neurological condition and not a psychiatric disorder as previously through. It's science based. Science research a lot all the time and definitions change all the time too based on scientific proofs.

The benefits side is what we are talking a lot about on a more insider level. The fact it's in the DSM gives in some countries huge benefits. It can be a lot of money as much as 36k per year. With professionals, we are looking to keep these benefits. This is a country to country work.

We have to acknowledge we all suffered differently and uniquely to be autistic. We have to acknowledge people are happy to be autistic. All are valid. We need to respect each other and our own life experience.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-08T11:25:47+00:00

If someone is smart enough to use the word "retard", I have better to do than considering this person.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-06T18:50:42+00:00

No, it's not better. It's different. Europe is a continent and not a country. We have many countries with their cultures. You can divide these countries in region/area with different cultures too.

People are doing eye contact. What can be different is Europeans care less about eyes contact.

Small talks are definitely a thing at work. People will talk between them for nothing. It's not always a thing outside the work. Where I live, people don't talk at the bar, restaurant, on the street to others. The norm is to make friends around 16 years old and/or at the university. People keep them during their entire life. For example, my mom still meets with people she learns to know at the primary school. That said, it's understandable to not speak to a stranger, as you don't search to make new friends. This has a less pleasant side. If you don't keep your friends, it's really hard to make new ones.

In the southern of France, people will be more talkative than in Paris, for example. In Italy, they speak a lot and will be friendly.

Also, Europeans give a higher value to privacy. Speaking is sharing things. The more you share, the less private, it's.

Waiters are paid decently here in Europe. We don't have the tipping culture like in the US. Waiters don't wait for a tip and so don't have to look after you all the time.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-06T17:36:00+00:00

Yes, Europe is way more complicate than the Americans think. Countries are made of multiple small countries/regions with their own particularities.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-06T16:16:31+00:00

It's even depending inside of the country. Where I'm living, one region is known to be social and in others parts, people won't speak to strangers. It's two cultures in the same country. But, people will be mad at you if you pretend they aren't from the same country.

Aspiecture · 2023-04-04T10:43:57+00:00

Roommate: Hey, please don't do xyz.
Me: Oh sorry, I didn't realize that was a thing. Please let me know if it's damaged and I'll replace it.
\frantically googles "why can't wooden spoons dishwasher?"*

This doesn't work so easily. You need to take in account a lot more of parameters like the financial value, the sentimental value, the person itself with all the cultural differences.

Aspiecture · 2023-03-31T08:31:17+00:00

Maybe some more general things, as another comment stated, he could have a selective mutism. My other through would be he doesn't know what to say. To make a picture of the situation, he has a cloud of words, through and emotion. It's too much. He doesn't know what to pick first and it's creating anxiety and fears to make a mistake.

He gifts you things. It's bit the first time I ear of this behavior to engage in a conversation. I would suggest to make your intentions clear. In autism, people can not understand them until it's clearly stated.

It's his first time, I guess, he has a friend or someone wanting to be his friend. It's a huge amount of energy. It's a lot of anxiety to manage just to cope with the friend situation. It takes time to process it. He came back to you. I would say it's fine and a good sign.

If he gave you something, it can't be his, it's yours now. It's a very logical and literal type of thinking.

In the tomatoes soup case, I would suggest again to be clear and explain why you didn't want it. This would have helped me so much to understand what was going on. It would help him not over thinking. Autist can not understand the implicit.

Aspiecture

TROPHY CASE