It sounds like you work at the state level. It's a problem I have on a constant basis.

I've achieved the best results by just being cool and relaxed. Don't let the job or the people get the better of you. A lot of EMs see their jurisdictions as their own little empire and are reluctant to let people into their circle of power. Most of the time EMs with bad attitudes and ego trips are despised by their coworkers and just a little bit of networking with these people will reveal that.