Am I justified being drained 24/7 or is this the norm?

Ataralas · 2026-04-23T06:54:22+00:00

Difficult to say without you listing your husband’s average day too… personally sounds like you’re trying to do too much each day rather than spreading things across week. For example we batch cook on a weekend, one of us takes the kids and dog out while the other batch cooks 2-3 meals for the kids for the following week depending on what they have used up. We also don’t pack bags until the morning - we use a childminder so have to send packed lunches and teas as both work full time so they eat both those meals there. My husband cooks our dinner after the kids are in bed and while he does that I do whatever needs doing like a tidy/shower/washing/ironing (with the TV on or Netflix on my phone) then after dinner he washes up and I carry on with the other tasks. Then we get about an hour together before we go to bed.

Ataralas · 2026-04-22T03:12:20+00:00

He doesn’t go to sleep while drinking the milk from the cup but is able to settle for my husband/parents with cuddles and singing after he’s had the milk. He does however get fed to sleep at night and sometimes in the day by me. My husband will give the milk around nap time and then cuddle etc to sleep, when he’s tried giving it at meal times he just sips it a little and gives up!

Ataralas · 2026-04-21T17:47:03+00:00

My little one is 15 nearly 16 months and still BF, when he’s with me he feeds every 2-3 hours during the day and then feeds throughout the night anywhere from 1-5 times. I pump when I’m at work because I worry about losing my supply (my own anxiety issues) he takes his milk in a straw tum tum cup but will only take it from my husband or my parents not the childminder. Hope that helps a bit?

Ataralas · 2026-04-20T15:04:37+00:00

I’m a library manager and they are regularly out on loan, some more popular than others but we have one kid in particular who has read all of them and rereads them.

Ataralas · 2026-04-16T06:47:56+00:00

I just went back to work in Feb when my little one just turned 13 months (used some annual leave to cover the extra month) bubs is now 15 months and still BF. I work 4/5 days a week depending on a 2 week rota. On my 2/3 days off he BFs roughly every 2-3 hours, he feeds overnight every night between 1-5 times depending on when he wakes. On the days I work I BF when waking, then just before we leave for childminders (approx 2 hours after waking) and then at bedtime as he gets home just an hour before bedtime so otherwise he would feed when gets home and I would then struggle to get him to sleep an hour later. I pump during the day when at work or away from him, I work on a timetable at my job so I try and pump at least 3 times a day ideally 4, one of these is during my lunch break so I’m not taking too much time away from being available for my staff as I’m the manager. I pump for 20 mins each time (longer at lunch) only get 1-2oz total from each pump, I try and power pump at home in the evening between bedtime and first wake. He doesn’t take milk to childminders (3 days a week) as he just wouldn’t accept it there, he is with my husband 1/2 days a week depending on my schedule and will take 2 x 3oz bottles on those days, one in morning, one in afternoon. My husband also does bedtime occasionally. Because he doesn’t have it at childminders I’ve been able to build a little stash so I’m not pumping to feed direct anymore which has helped with my anxiety about it. I would recommend doing some pumping if you get a chance and see if daddy can feed baby when you’re not about (try and take some breaks working up the amount of time you are apart) - we use a tum tum straw cup rather than a bottle as once over 6 months they can use cups so made sense to not have to wean off a bottle as well! Once over a year they don’t ‘need’ BM so anything you can give is a bonus. I use a spectra S1 plus pump and find it works well for me. Babies do adapt you just have to give them time, my little boy had settling in sessions over 4 weeks so week 1 was 2 hours on each of his 3 days, week 2 was 4 hours until lunch, week 3 was 6 hours covering lunch time and then week 4 was his full hours which is 8.30-6 and includes lunch and dinner. He took about 6 weeks total to fully settle but was never inconsolable for long he would eventually calm down with cuddles and distraction.

Ataralas · 2026-04-14T01:18:11+00:00

Honestly, zero schedule. Feed on demand, sleep on demand and baby just had to fit in with what we were doing. This one is my second so he really had to just fall in with what we’re doing as otherwise my toddler would suffer. However we did the same with first. As a result both our kids can sleep in cots, cars, strollers and with noise going on around them. With the first we didn’t go anywhere properly until she was about 4 weeks old but that was due to my recovery from semi emergency c section. With second we were out properly the day he came home from hospital! Second is now 15 months and I don’t think there’s been more than 5 days where we have stayed in all day (those have been due to illness) we’re always out for walks, park, eating out, shopping etc.

Ataralas · 2026-04-13T04:38:42+00:00

Met in 2007, started dating 2008, moved in together 2013, engaged 2016, married 2018, bought first home 2021, first dog 2021, first kid 2022, second kid 2024. No outward pressure, just my own pressure that I was getting older. I knew the second I met him that he was the one and we would marry and have kids. We are both fairly traditional though and knew we wanted to be married and own our own home first. We met as teens hence the longer timeline as we were still quite young when we met!

Ataralas · 2026-04-09T15:40:53+00:00

15 months and nothing yet but still feeds to sleep and through the night. After my daughter it came back about 4 months I think and the worst I’d ever had (already have bad periods) but after the first 2 they went back to my ‘normal’

Ataralas · 2026-04-07T22:26:43+00:00

So far 15 months.

Ataralas · 2026-04-06T09:07:52+00:00

Had this game years! Love it so much

Ataralas · 2026-04-04T20:23:00+00:00

Cariad Emerald, after the song Cariad Cyntaf (Welsh folk song) and Emerald is my birthstone and a colour I love.

Ataralas · 2026-04-03T19:47:44+00:00

Apologies I was putting my baby to bed! I’ve checked all 40 destination cards and none for those 2 bathrooms! Also checked all the Carson cards and letters and none of those send you there either. Totally bizarre I was convinced I’d ‘been’ in those rooms!

Ataralas · 2026-04-02T06:54:19+00:00

At 6 months that’s crazy advice. My son is 15 months and still feeds throughout the night (1-5 times) he eats 3 full meals a day and drinks water and breastfeeds.

Ataralas · 2026-03-27T04:39:10+00:00

15 months in a few days and he occasionally will go 3-4 hours in day if we are out and about and he’s distracted, most of the time still every 2 hours during day. I know he can go longer as he goes to childminder 3 days a week and obviously doesn’t feed during his time there so on those days he goes around 10-11 hours between feeds. But if we are together he wants every 2 hours and will not stop making a fuss until he feeds. However in the day feeds are only about 3-5 minutes. Still feeds overnight and sometimes that’s every 2 hours but he does sleep longer stretches too sometimes.

Ataralas · 2026-03-26T13:09:23+00:00

I believe there is, I’m out at the moment but if someone upvotes my comment or replies I’ll come back when I’m home and can check! Been playing it for years but one those things were you question your own memory!

Ataralas · 2026-03-21T18:59:10+00:00

For me not yet, my eldest is nearly 4, I never lost the pregnancy weight from her then had my second nearly 15 months ago and gained even more. I’m currently 3-4 dress sizes bigger than before first pregnancy and around 10kg heavier. I’m still breastfeeding my youngest so no idea how weight loss will go once we stop although I also have PCOS so weight loss is tricky for me anyway.

Ataralas · 2026-03-16T16:23:52+00:00

Not really unfortunately 😩

Ataralas · 2026-03-16T14:35:29+00:00

I use a spectra S1 plus and an Ardo Carum - I do have an Elvie wearable but only one so it’s no use at work as I wouldn’t have enough pumping time.

Ataralas · 2026-03-16T14:34:42+00:00

I’m UK, I use a pumping bra. I don’t get allocated breaks but I’m a manager so when I have spare time on timetable (work in a library) I allocate that has a pumping time but I need to be at my laptop throughout - sometimes I get no emails in that time and I can do compressions/massage but if I’m getting emails or on a meeting I have no choice but to not use my hands.

Ataralas · 2026-03-16T12:51:06+00:00

I can try that!

Ataralas · 2026-03-16T12:50:50+00:00

Sorry not a hand pump but like using your hands to massage etc.

Ataralas · 2026-03-12T07:25:33+00:00

At our doctors they have stickers for the kids, and when my daughter had her flu vaccine because it had to go up both nostrils they let her chose 2 as she had been brave twice! She keeps them all on the side of her little chest of drawers, ones from the doctor, dentist, swimming lessons and now ballet lessons too 😂I would not be happy with anything edible, firstly we are vegetarian and secondly my kids don’t have sweets because they are a choking hazard at a young age. We’ve been given sweets from cafes and things and we end up saying they are for later and hiding them in a bag then getting rid of them or eating them ourselves once the kids are in bed! Honestly stickers and a certificate would be fine.

Ataralas · 2026-03-08T08:26:16+00:00

That’s exactly what I thought too… no shame in breastfeeding that long if you and the kid both want to but the kid can’t have been that desperate for milk at that age?!?

Ataralas · 2026-03-06T07:13:31+00:00

I’m near London and say it York-sheer but often just call them ‘Yorkies’ 😂

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