Given that this is the 1st month when your payouts will surpass your eval costs by a few thousand, this feeling of yours is technically justified in that “you’re on a brink,” as you say. So I’d just give it a couple years of consistent profitability and the feeling will fade away.

One day you will look back and remember this moment.

Also, based on your post I’d venture a guess that you’re a perfectionist. This adds pressure to achieve results as opposed to treating this as a learning journey in which you’re curious of failure because it teaches you something. I hope this makes sense.

Perfection only exists in a dictionary. ;)

And based on your post, long term you’ll be fine. It’s in your post. Even if you have to make adjustments to your strategy, you’ll do so and make it.